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Author Topic: Goodbye dear friend  (Read 864 times)

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Raeturbo

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Goodbye dear friend
« on: 02 September 2019, 14:21:46 »

An Obituary printed in the London Times.....Absolutely Dead Brilliant!!t
 
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who
has been with us for many years.
No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long
ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
 
- Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
- Why the early bird gets the worm; 
- Life isn't kkalways fair; 
- And maybe it was my fault.
 
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend
more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).
 
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing
regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
 
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the
job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.
 
It declined even further when schools were required to get parental
consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
 
Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses;
and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
 
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a
burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
 
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed
to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot.
She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
 
Common Sense was preceded in death,
-by his parents, Truth and Trust,
-by his wife, Discretion,
-by his daughter, Responsibility,
-and by his son, Reason.
 
He is survived by his 5 stepchildren;
- I Know My Rights 
- I Want It Now 
- Someone Else Is To Blame 
- I'm A Victim
- Pay me for Doing Nothing
 
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. 
If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing
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Lizzie Zoom

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Re: Goodbye dear friend
« Reply #1 on: 02 September 2019, 14:51:04 »

Very good and correct in numerous ways!! :y :y :y

I feel, I'm afraid to say, that his death started in the 1960's, the age we found was so liberating and good for the World! ::) ::) :(
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STEMO

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Re: Goodbye dear friend
« Reply #2 on: 02 September 2019, 15:13:46 »

I think I'm going to be sick.........


🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢 wait for it.......🤮🤮🤮🤮

 ;D ;D
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Sir Tigger KC

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Re: Goodbye dear friend
« Reply #3 on: 02 September 2019, 16:12:48 »

Alas poor Common Sense we knew him well....  :'(

Or did we?  ;D
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Re: Goodbye dear friend
« Reply #4 on: 02 September 2019, 22:37:57 »

I spilled my hot coffee whilst reading that on my phone, because some stupid car was in the middle of the road and nearly hit me!  I blame everyone, wheres my free money?!
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