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Author Topic: Sticky for Jokes  (Read 105155 times)

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STEMO

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Re: Sticky for Jokes
« Reply #885 on: 03 January 2018, 20:48:04 »

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If you are offended by anything I post, sorry. Just thought I'd get that in now.

Varche

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Re: Sticky for Jokes
« Reply #886 on: 04 January 2018, 11:34:46 »

 :y
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My doctor has diagnosed me as paranoid. I wonder who else he has told?

ronnyd

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Re: Sticky for Jokes
« Reply #887 on: 04 January 2018, 23:05:00 »

SWMBO didn,t get it. ;D
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Shackeng

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Re: Sticky for Jokes
« Reply #888 on: Today at 18:41:06 »

 In the great days of the British Empire, a new commanding officer was sent to an African jungle outpost to relieve the retiring colonel.
 
After welcoming his replacement and showing the usual courtesies (gin and tonic, cucumber sandwiches etc) which protocol decrees, the retiring colonel said,
"You must meet my Adjutant, Captain Smithers, He's my right-hand man and is really the strength of this office. His talent is simply boundless."
Smithers was summoned and introduced to the new CO, who was surprised to meet a hunchback, one eyed, toothless, hairless, scabby and pockmarked specimen of humanity, a particularly unattractive man less than three feet tall.
"Smithers, old man, tell your new CO about yourself."
''Well, Sir, Smithers replied, I graduated with honours from Sandhurst, joined the regiment and won the Military Cross and Bar after three expeditions behind enemy lines. I've represented Great Britain in equestrian events and won a Silver Medal in the boxing middleweight division of the Olympics. I have researched the history of........................."
At which point the Colonel interrupted,
"Yes, yes, never mind that Smithers, he can find all that in your file. Tell him about the day you told the local witch doctor to f*&k off."
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