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Author Topic: STEMO  (Read 6478 times)

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TheBoy

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STEMO
« on: 24 May 2016, 17:27:37 »
Some advice needed, dear friend...

I've been clenched for the last 2hrs, so tightly that my butt cheeks ache.  I've just sat on the potty, and mostly rusty water has come out, but, oooooo, the relief!


My question is, is this what its like to be old?
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Re: STEMO
« Reply #1 on: 24 May 2016, 17:35:10 »
Quote from: TheBoy on 24 May 2016, 17:27:37
Some advice needed, dear friend...

I've been clenched for the last 2hrs, so tightly that my butt cheeks ache.  I've just sat on the potty, and mostly rusty water has come out, but, oooooo, the relief!


My question is, is this what its like to be old?

'Fookin ell'

The old boy will give you advice as soon as he returns from taking his whippet for a walk. :)
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Nick W

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Re: STEMO
« Reply #2 on: 24 May 2016, 17:45:52 »
Quote from: Doctor Opti on 24 May 2016, 17:35:10
Quote from: TheBoy on 24 May 2016, 17:27:37
Some advice needed, dear friend...

I've been clenched for the last 2hrs, so tightly that my butt cheeks ache.  I've just sat on the potty, and mostly rusty water has come out, but, oooooo, the relief!


My question is, is this what its like to be old?

'Fookin ell'

The old boy will give you advice as soon as he returns from taking his whippet for a walk. :)


The old boy will probably send a sample of his rusty water for you to compare.
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TheBoy

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Re: STEMO
« Reply #3 on: 24 May 2016, 17:49:08 »
Quote from: Nick W on 24 May 2016, 17:45:52
Quote from: Doctor Opti on 24 May 2016, 17:35:10
Quote from: TheBoy on 24 May 2016, 17:27:37
Some advice needed, dear friend...

I've been clenched for the last 2hrs, so tightly that my butt cheeks ache.  I've just sat on the potty, and mostly rusty water has come out, but, oooooo, the relief!


My question is, is this what its like to be old?

'Fookin ell'

The old boy will give you advice as soon as he returns from taking his whippet for a walk. :)


The old boy will probably send a sample of his rusty water for you to compare.
Not again :o
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TheBoy

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Re: STEMO
« Reply #4 on: 24 May 2016, 17:49:22 »
Oh oppsit
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TheBoy

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Re: STEMO
« Reply #5 on: 24 May 2016, 17:49:40 »
Whats the chances of that  >:(
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Re: STEMO
« Reply #6 on: 24 May 2016, 17:50:17 »
Doubt he'll be of much use to be honest TB, as I don't think he gets to the loo in time very often.  :(
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TheBoy

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Re: STEMO
« Reply #7 on: 24 May 2016, 17:50:39 »
Mrs TB! Heeeellllpppppp!
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TheBoy

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Re: STEMO
« Reply #8 on: 24 May 2016, 17:51:55 »
Deciding "the leak" from my unclenched cheeks had finished, I got up and flushed...   ...and its splashed. Everywhere.

'dangle berries'.
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Re: STEMO
« Reply #9 on: 24 May 2016, 17:52:59 »
Quote from: TheBoy on 24 May 2016, 17:27:37
Some advice needed, dear friend...

I've been clenched for the last 2hrs, so tightly that my butt cheeks ache.  I've just sat on the potty, and mostly rusty water has come out, but, oooooo, the relief!


My question is, is this what its like to be old?

No. You lose the ability to clench when you get old.................. apparently.  :)


Quote from: TheBoy on 24 May 2016, 17:27:37
I've been clenched for the last 2hrs, so tightly that my butt cheeks ache.  I've just sat on the potty, and mostly rusty water has come out, but, oooooo, the relief!

It didn't by any chance splash on to your MV6 did it?  :-X ;)
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Crazycarzowner

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Re: STEMO
« Reply #10 on: 24 May 2016, 17:55:02 »
Well known to bung anything up!!!!  ;D ;D ;D ;D


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YZ250

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Re: STEMO
« Reply #11 on: 24 May 2016, 18:03:55 »
Quote from: TheBoy on 24 May 2016, 17:51:55
Deciding "the leak" from my unclenched cheeks had finished, I got up and flushed...   ...and its splashed. Everywhere.

'dangle berries'.

Did the seat lid act as a splash-back.  ;D

The ultimate torture is a slow closing toilet seat. Your guts is churning and you watch in horror as the piggin toilet seat casually takes an eternity to lower. I've killed a few slow closures hinges by forcing it down to speed it up.  ;D ;D
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STEMO

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Re: STEMO
« Reply #12 on: 24 May 2016, 18:22:27 »
Nowt to be worried or ashamed about, lad. It's a natural body function and a good clearout now and again does you good. Just make sure you're within jumping distance of a toilet when the urge strikes.
Keep taking the nagas  ;D
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STEMO

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Re: STEMO
« Reply #13 on: 24 May 2016, 18:24:50 »
An added benefit in your case is, what with you being a fat bastard an all, you might lose a few pounds if your body doesn't have time to digest the shite you put down your neck.
Keep your chins up..... ;D
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TheBoy

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Re: STEMO
« Reply #14 on: 24 May 2016, 18:29:06 »
Quote from: STEMO on 24 May 2016, 18:24:50
An added benefit in your case is, what with you being a fat bastard an all, you might lose a few pounds if your body doesn't have time to digest the shite you put down your neck.
Keep your chins up..... ;D
Will I ever pass solids again?
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