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[Rangie]

My best mate had a problem with his when he was abroad on holiday so he was not allowed to fly back as scheduled allegedly, when he returned to work two weeks late we asked why he couldn't fly, he said that in simple terms the change in air pressure could cause his arse to explode ! Whether this was true or not I have no idea but it had us in stitches.

[STEMO]

I have one, but all it does is get extremely itchy at the most inopportune moments. 
Maybe you need to assemble a Stanley knife, a soldering iron, and a mirror and perform a bit of DIY surgery.
How hard can it be ? 

The four phases of mine are normal, swelled up, pop, itchy. 
I was glad when they put the anusol out on the shelves instead of only behind the counter in Asda. Then I discovered the bazaar that is amazon.

[TheBoy]

cause his arse to explode

My post madras potty visit this morning was like a volcanic eruption, spewing shit and blood all over the porcelain.

Cleaning that up will keep her busy for ages

[STEMO]

cause his arse to explode

My post madras potty visit this morning was like a volcanic eruption, spewing shit and blood all over the porcelain.

Cleaning that up will keep her busy for ages

You are a most uncouth human being 

[TheBoy]

anusol

I bleieve that is one of the torpedo brands available, so you know what I mean when I said they were slippery ficcers when wet

[Doctor Gollum]

Stop clenching and take it like a man

[TheBoy]

cause his arse to explode

My post madras potty visit this morning was like a volcanic eruption, spewing shit and blood all over the porcelain.

Cleaning that up will keep her busy for ages

You are a most uncouth human being 

I'm having visions of her having to just her thumbnail to scrap it off.

Lord Opti would be so proud of me.

[STEMO]

anusol

I bleieve that is one of the torpedo brands available, so you know what I mean when I said they were slippery ficcers when wet

Ointment with the looooong tube for me. Apparently it can be addictive. 

[STEMO]

Talking of equality, where are all the women telling us about their anal squatters? 

[Doctor Gollum]

Having a flounce after yesterday.

[tigers_gonads]

I well remember the night he was allowed to take the reins for a few hours. It was pandemonium - but hilarious. 
Must be almost 10 years ago ! 

Remember it well 
Out of interest, did his crock's ever make it back to stoke ?   

[TheBoy]

Out of interest, did his crock's ever make it back to stoke ?   

No idea, but they went to more places than he ever will

[ronnyd]

I have one, but all it does is get extremely itchy at the most inopportune moments. 
Maybe you need to assemble a Stanley knife, a soldering iron, and a mirror and perform a bit of DIY surgery.
How hard can it be ? 

The four phases of mine are normal, swelled up, pop, itchy. 
I was glad when they put the anusol out on the shelves instead of only behind the counter in Asda. Then I discovered the bazaar that is amazon.

My old GP, now retired sadly  , told me that the "over the counter" stuff was quite ineffective. He prescribed Ultraproct bombs and ointment. Worked far better for me. 

[tigers_gonads]

Out of interest, did his crock's ever make it back to stoke ?   

No idea, but they went to more places than he ever will

 

[STEMO]

I have one, but all it does is get extremely itchy at the most inopportune moments. 
Maybe you need to assemble a Stanley knife, a soldering iron, and a mirror and perform a bit of DIY surgery.
How hard can it be ? 

The four phases of mine are normal, swelled up, pop, itchy. 
I was glad when they put the anusol out on the shelves instead of only behind the counter in Asda. Then I discovered the bazaar that is amazon.

My old GP, now retired sadly  , told me that the "over the counter" stuff was quite ineffective. He prescribed Ultraproct bombs and ointment. Worked far better for me. 

If I wanted something from my GP I'd have to explain to the receptionist why I needed to speak to him. I could either go the sensitive route "I need something for my haemorrhoids", or the full on "Massive bunch of grapes hanging out my rectum".