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dave the builder:

--- Quote from: Varche on 29 August 2022, 13:28:23 ---£650,000 for Princess Diana’s RS Turbo is very reasonable considering Prince Andrew’s Escort cost him £12 million .

--- End quote ---
Prince Andrew's was a younger model

Raeturbo:
Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he couldn’t get his cock out of the chicken.

johnnydog:
A lecturer is giving a talk on the paranormal.

Guy: "How many people believe in ghosts?"

About 60 hands go up.

"How many have seen a ghost.?"

About 15 hands go up.

"How many have of you have spoken to a ghost?"

3 hands go up.

"How many have had sex with a ghost?"

One hand goes up, Abdul right at the back.

Guy says to Abdul, "I have been doing this for over 40 years and you are the first that has claimed to have had sex with a ghost. Please can you explain?"

Abdul says, "Sorry, I couldn't hear you properly at the back, I thought you said a goat."

JasonH:
Celibacy can be a choice in life,
or a condition imposed by circumstances.

While attending a Marriage Weekend,
Brian and his wife, Lizzy, listened to the instructor declare,
'It is essential that husbands and wives know
the things that are important to each other.'
He then addressed the men,
'Can you name and describe your wife's favourite flower?'

Brian leaned over, touched Lizzy's arm gently,
and whispered, "Homepride, isn't it ?"

And thus began Brian's life of celibacy.​

JasonH:
A Russian and an Irish wrestler were set to square off for the Olympic gold medal. Before the final match, the Irish wrestler's trainer came to him and said 'Now, don't forget all the research we've done on this Russian. He's never lost a match because of this 'pretzel' hold he has. Whatever you do, do not let him get you in that hold! If he does, you're finished.'

The Irishman nodded in acknowledgement.

As the match started, the Irishman and the Russian circled each other several times, looking for an opening. All of a sudden, the Russian lunged forward, grabbing the Irishman and wrapping him up in the dreaded pretzel hold. A sigh of disappointment arose from the crowd and the trainer buried his face in his hands, for he knew all was lost. He couldn't watch the inevitable happen.

Suddenly, there was a Long, High Pitched Scream, then a cheer from the crowd and the trainer raised his eyes just in time to watch the Russian go flying up in the air. His back hit the mat with a thud and the Irishman collapsed on top of him, making the pin and winning the match.

The trainer was astounded. When he finally got his wrestler alone, he asked 'How did you ever get out of that hold? No one has ever done it before!'

The wrestler answered 'Well, I was ready to give up when he got me in that hold but at the last moment, I opened my eyes and saw this pair of testicles right in front of my face. I had nothing to lose so with my last ounce of strength, I stretched out my neck and bit those babies just as hard as I could.'

The trainer exclaimed 'That's what finished him off?


'Not really. You'd be amazed how strong you get when you bite your own nuts.

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