Omega Owners Forum

Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: tunnie on 14 August 2006, 23:43:08

Title: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 14 August 2006, 23:43:08
I have no idea if i get another star for 500 posts, will i change colour who knows!........
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 14 August 2006, 23:43:49
pah, bugger all. Not even an extra star  >:(
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 14 August 2006, 23:44:36
no wait!! i am an expert!!!! WHOOOOOOO check out the bling of me gold!!! Bou Yeh  ;D  [smiley=2vrolijk_08.gif]
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Markie on 14 August 2006, 23:44:46
eeeeh yes you have. An extra star!!!

And seeing as you have just sold roject a - OMEGA EXPERT STATUS!!!!!
Well Done that tunnie

Im on it...... :)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 14 August 2006, 23:46:01
your not far behind m8....

Perfect timing too selling project A, and maybe getting project B....  :D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Markie on 14 August 2006, 23:46:19
Jeez tunnie you have the first three posts in your own thread..... ;D you type fast matey
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 14 August 2006, 23:49:47
dunno why, but when half pissed i can touch type so fast!! i can type entire sentenses without looking!! i will then notice i am doing it, then try and do it some more but then i can't... lol!!
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Auto Addict on 15 August 2006, 06:23:09
Quote
dunno why, but when half pissed i can touch type so fast!! i can type entire sentenses without looking!! i will then notice i am doing it, then try and do it some more but then i can't... lol!!

Back to gold stars...MarkJay will be envious....well done tunnie lad [smiley=thumbsup.gif]
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Taxi_Driver on 15 August 2006, 06:27:24
Well done tunnie  [smiley=thumbsup.gif]
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Salty on 15 August 2006, 07:29:49
An expert as well ;)

well done, but what happens next??
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Marks DTM Calib on 15 August 2006, 08:34:48
I have more posts than that and 5 stars....ow yes, I have always had five stars!
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: TheOutcast on 15 August 2006, 08:37:27
Quote
no wait!! i am an expert!!!! WHOOOOOOO check out the bling of me gold!!! Bou Yeh  ;D  [smiley=2vrolijk_08.gif]
Now that you're an expert, will you come and change my cambelt for me? [smiley=vrolijk_26.gif]
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Martin_1962 on 15 August 2006, 09:24:18
Well done - two weeks holiday really hurt my posting averages
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Admin on 15 August 2006, 09:57:10
<<Dave goes and increases number of posts required for the 5 star level...>>>  ;D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: nixoro on 15 August 2006, 10:15:58
Well done tunnie Congrats mate  :)

Something to look forward too
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 15 August 2006, 10:54:23
Thanks for the replys all  :)

Quote
Quote
no wait!! i am an expert!!!! WHOOOOOOO check out the bling of me gold!!! Bou Yeh  ;D  [smiley=2vrolijk_08.gif]
Now that you're an expert, will you come and change my cambelt for me? [smiley=vrolijk_26.gif]

Sure thing, just don't expect it to run again afterwards!  ;D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: TheBoy on 15 August 2006, 16:33:22
well done mark. i assume you were the first to hit 'expert' status....
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Auto Addict on 15 August 2006, 17:22:58
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well done mark. i assume you were the first to hit 'expert' status....

I think you should set him 20 test questions to prove he is an expert ;D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 15 August 2006, 18:06:16
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well done mark. i assume you were the first to hit 'expert' status....

I think you should set him 20 test questions to prove he is an expert ;D

I got my 'Expert' status fair and square  ;)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: TheBoy on 15 August 2006, 18:35:24
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I got my 'Expert' status fair and square  ;)
It can easily be withdrawn...  ...now what does this 'Ban Member' button do  ::)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 15 August 2006, 18:52:59
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I got my 'Expert' status fair and square  ;)
It can easily be withdrawn...  ...now what does this 'Ban Member' button do  ::)

 ;D ;D

Think all that power gone to your head  ;)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Auto Addict on 15 August 2006, 18:53:45
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Quote
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I got my 'Expert' status fair and square  ;)
It can easily be withdrawn...  ...now what does this 'Ban Member' button do  ::)

 ;D ;D

Think all that power gone to your head  ;)

 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Bo Bo on 15 August 2006, 18:58:02
Might get there in a couple of years!  [smiley=shocked.gif]
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 15 August 2006, 19:09:47
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Quote
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I got my 'Expert' status fair and square  ;)
It can easily be withdrawn...  ...now what does this 'Ban Member' button do  ::)

 ;D ;D

Think all that power gone to your head  ;)

 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

*Waits For Ban Notifcation*
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Taxi_Driver on 15 August 2006, 19:15:16
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well done mark. i assume you were the first to hit 'expert' status....

I think you should set him 20 test questions to prove he is an expert ;D

I agree AA  ;D
Ok 1st question......
You get your EML on now and then when starting from hot and the car goes into limp mode
You read the fault codes and among others its complaining of cam sensor
Do you....

A) Do nothing and hope everything will be alright
B) Take it to Vx dealer and let them charge you mega amounts changing parts at random and not actually fix the problem
C) Change the cam sensor
D) Flog it to Ronnie for £50
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: TheBoy on 15 August 2006, 19:17:16
B.  Keeps the useless kids employed, and off the streets...
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Auto Addict on 15 August 2006, 19:26:10
Quote
B.  Keeps the useless kids employed, and off the streets...

Tut! Tut! The questions were for tunnie not you, as Captain Mainwaring would say "Stupid Boy" ;D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 15 August 2006, 19:31:15
Ok..

If it was a project car and i needed flog it to make a profit, then Option A (not that i just did that of course ::)

If it was a fleet car and not me paying the bill Option B.

If it was my facelift then Option C.

Knowing Ronnie he would beat me down to a tenner for it!
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Auto Addict on 15 August 2006, 19:35:08
Quote
Ok..

If it was a project car and i needed flog it to make a profit, then Option A (not that i just did that of course ::)

If it was a fleet car and not me paying the bill Option B.

If it was my facelift then Option C.

Knowing Ronnie he would beat me down to a tenner for it!

Sorry, wrong answers, all posts will now be reset (only I don't have the power)  :(

 ;D ;D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 15 August 2006, 19:42:54
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Ok..

If it was a project car and i needed flog it to make a profit, then Option A (not that i just did that of course ::)

If it was a fleet car and not me paying the bill Option B.

If it was my facelift then Option C.

Knowing Ronnie he would beat me down to a tenner for it!

Sorry, wrong answers, all posts will now be reset (only I don't have the power)  :(

 ;D ;D


Muhahaa, besides i out-rank you. I am an "expert"  :P
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Martin_1962 on 15 August 2006, 21:13:39
Well not too many to go for me - just need to try harder!
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: TheOutcast on 15 August 2006, 21:19:47
I'm an expert at talking b*ll*cks, does that count? [smiley=beer.gif]
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Martin_1962 on 15 August 2006, 21:52:18
We are all experts at something, me for example can program in various XBASE family languages, can convert an Omega to LPG, can strip a Rootes group 1600 in half hour, can shoot video and edit to high standards ect ect
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 15 August 2006, 22:00:39
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We are all experts at something, me for example can program in various XBASE family languages, can convert an Omega to LPG, can strip a Rootes group 1600 in half hour, can shoot video and edit to high standards ect ect

Bah thats nothing.. :D

Only joking, very impressive!!

Agreed most people are experts in various areas, if given the right components and decent screw driver i can built a PC from the ground up in around 20 mins, power suppler, motherboard, hard drives. At my old job i could get a PC built and have it installing windows within 20/25 mins...

I can do video editing too, pinicle for PC but it sucks, Final Cut Pro is good, generally most things regarding PC's are dead easy..

I used to be utterly useless when it came to cars, but now i can change the pads, do a oil & filter change, brake bleed and so on....

Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Martin_1962 on 15 August 2006, 22:11:59
I started editing in 1986, in 1989 I used the following kit

Sony SLF1 portable with editing on a Sony SLHF950
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Taxi_Driver on 15 August 2006, 22:24:06
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Quote
Ok..

If it was a project car and i needed flog it to make a profit, then Option A (not that i just did that of course ::)

If it was a fleet car and not me paying the bill Option B.

If it was my facelift then Option C.

Knowing Ronnie he would beat me down to a tenner for it!

Sorry, wrong answers, all posts will now be reset (only I don't have the power)  :(

 ;D ;D

I agree AA.....C should have been the answer everytime....make Tunnie a newbie TheBoy  ;D ;D

Go on then AA........next question???? dont make them too easy  ;)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Auto Addict on 15 August 2006, 22:29:41
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Quote
Quote
Ok..

If it was a project car and i needed flog it to make a profit, then Option A (not that i just did that of course ::)

If it was a fleet car and not me paying the bill Option B.

If it was my facelift then Option C.

Knowing Ronnie he would beat me down to a tenner for it!

Sorry, wrong answers, all posts will now be reset (only I don't have the power)  :(

 ;D ;D

I agree AA.....C should have been the answer everytime....make Tunnie a newbie TheBoy  ;D ;D

Go on then AA........next question???? dont make them too easy  ;)

Next question (FOR TUNNIE ONLY)

Your Omega is leaking water from the passenger side wiper blade spindle and your plug wells are filling with water - what do you do if you are a Vx Techie?
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Taxi_Driver on 15 August 2006, 22:35:57
Thats a bit tricky AA.......you coulda done multiple guess  ;D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Taxi_Driver on 15 August 2006, 22:38:43
And a Vx techi.......ummmm nothing then  ;D

Sorry did i give the answer away  ::)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Hillper on 15 August 2006, 22:43:27
Incorrect.

Attach a Tech2 and diagnose ECU failure.  Then charge £900 for a replacement.

Edit.  Congrats Tunnie.  I'm right on your heels!
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 15 August 2006, 23:16:22
bah.. Hillper beat me to it.

Well if it was a Vx money in a suit, i would charge at least 2 hours labour just to investigate the problem.

Personally i would wip out the scuttle drain in mins...

Quite funny i am regarded as an expert... compared to newbies like hillper...  ;D

What happens when i hit 1000 posts?? do i become and admin and get some power?  :D ;D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Auto Addict on 16 August 2006, 06:26:12
Quote
bah.. Hillper beat me to it.

Well if it was a Vx money in a suit, i would charge at least 2 hours labour just to investigate the problem.

Personally i would wip out the scuttle drain in mins...

Quite funny i am regarded as an expert... compared to newbies like hillper...  ;D

What happens when i hit 1000 posts?? do i become and admin and get some power?  :D ;D

Wrong again tunnie

You replace the bottom windscreen seal (under warranty thank God) and find it hasn't cured the problem.
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: TheOutcast on 16 August 2006, 14:47:52
Quote
Not exactly rocket science is it?
I'm 61, left school at 15 with no qualifications, spent most of my working life in the shoe trade, and I built my own computer.
I bought the parts from e-buyer, a mother board, CPU & fan, and memory as a bundle. Added a Hard drive. Video card, Sound card and CD burner. (I really must upgrade to DVD)
And a box to put them all in.
It took me about an hour, from opening the boxes, to beginning the installation of XP.
Including time spent reading the instructions.  [smiley=rolleyes.gif]
Of course, the fact that you can't plug anything in the wrong slot helps. I think they are designed to be idiot proof, in as much that things will only fit in the correct slot.  [smiley=wink.gif]
In fact they must be idiot proof, or I wouldn't have been able to do it!! [smiley=beer.gif]

Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Markjay on 16 August 2006, 22:30:34
All hail OMEGA EXPERT....

We mere mortals bow to you Sir tunnie

But only until we get our own Four Stars!  ;)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Kev on 16 August 2006, 22:46:47
Congrats tunnie.  [smiley=thumbsup.gif]
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: nixoro on 17 August 2006, 15:23:26
Just thought I would join the club, not that I'm an expert in omega's an all that.

More like an expert in asking silly questions and posting posts like this one  ;D

Oh it didn't change Oh well, still hit 500 though.
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: TheOutcast on 17 August 2006, 15:54:17
Quote
Just thought I would join the club, not that I'm an expert in omega's an all that.

More like an expert in asking silly questions and posting posts like this one  ;D

Oh it didn't change Oh well, still hit 500 though.


Congratulations. [smiley=vrolijk_26.gif] [smiley=beer.gif] [smiley=tekst-toppie.gif]
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: nixoro on 17 August 2006, 15:59:25
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Quote
Just thought I would join the club, not that I'm an expert in omega's an all that.

More like an expert in asking silly questions and posting posts like this one  ;D

Oh it didn't change Oh well, still hit 500 though.


Congratulations. [smiley=vrolijk_26.gif] [smiley=beer.gif] [smiley=tekst-toppie.gif]

Cheers Matey  :)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: TheBoy on 17 August 2006, 16:02:14
Well done Roy :)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: nixoro on 17 August 2006, 16:07:19
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Well done Roy :)

Cheers Jaime  :)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: mr des on 17 August 2006, 16:28:14
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Well done Roy :)

Cheers Jaime  :)
[smiley=vrolijk_26.gif] congrats
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: nixoro on 17 August 2006, 16:31:46
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Quote
Quote
Well done Roy :)

Cheers Jaime  :)
[smiley=vrolijk_26.gif] congrats

Cheers mr des  [smiley=thumbsup.gif]
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Martin_1962 on 17 August 2006, 16:58:39
All these replies are pushing you towards the fifth star - I think I'll hit 500 around the same time the site hits 200 members
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: nixoro on 17 August 2006, 17:03:23
Quote
All these replies are pushing you towards the fifth star - I think I'll hit 500 around the same time the site hits 200 members

Yeah probably but its all good fun  :)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Auto Addict on 17 August 2006, 17:37:07
Quote

More like an expert in asking silly questions and posting posts like this one  ;D

We didn't like to say anything...... ;D

Well done [smiley=thumbsup.gif]
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 17 August 2006, 19:08:39
Quote
All hail OMEGA EXPERT....

We mere mortals bow to you Sir tunnie

But only until we get our own Four Stars!  ;)

Its a shame you don't get any admin rights at 500 posts, i'd make you all bow to me... (until i get banned  ;D)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: TheBoy on 17 August 2006, 19:12:15
500 posts? Pah! thats nothing...  ;D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 17 August 2006, 19:19:50
Quote
500 posts? Pah! thats nothing...  ;D


Thats only cause you abused your power and added on some extra posts... ;D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: TheBoy on 17 August 2006, 19:25:14
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Quote
500 posts? Pah! thats nothing...  ;D


Thats only cause you abused your power and added on some extra posts... ;D
You're crediting me with too much intelligence...  ;D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Martin_1962 on 17 August 2006, 19:53:36
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Quote
500 posts? Pah! thats nothing...  ;D


Thats only cause you abused your power and added on some extra posts... ;D

He lives on here, it is his job
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: TheBoy on 17 August 2006, 20:42:15
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Quote
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500 posts? Pah! thats nothing...  ;D


Thats only cause you abused your power and added on some extra posts... ;D

He lives on here, it is his job
LOL, if only. Doubt it would pay the mortgage  :(

Wish I had more time here, but I always seem to be in the back end of this forum, dont even get much time to browse the forum  :'(.  Currently stuck with a script that is getting out of hand :(

Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Auto Addict on 17 August 2006, 21:35:52
Quote:Currently stuck with a script that is getting out of hand

You mean the one top right? :)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: TheBoy on 17 August 2006, 21:41:54
LOL, you're just gutted you've been dropped ;)

Nah, this is a backend script for Google submissions, and it ain't working  >:(
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Auto Addict on 17 August 2006, 21:43:39
Quote
LOL, you're just gutted you've been dropped ;)

Nah, this is a backend script for Google submissions, and it ain't working  >:(

Whose gutted? :'( :'( :'(
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Markjay on 18 August 2006, 00:13:42
When membership reaches 200, do all existing members get an extra start as windfall payment?  :o
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Martin_1962 on 19 August 2006, 21:26:22
Yay post 500!!!! :D :) ;D 8-) [smiley=thumbsup.gif]
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 19 August 2006, 22:39:34
Quote
Yay post 500!!!! :D :) ;D 8-) [smiley=thumbsup.gif]

I'd better get cracking and see what 1000 does!  ;)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Markie on 19 August 2006, 22:46:55
woo hoo just realised i got my 500 and expert status today - didnt notice - been so excited since managing to get my rear headrests of Ronnie and his breaking MV6

Party Time :D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 19 August 2006, 22:53:42
Quote
woo hoo just realised i got my 500 and expert status today - didnt notice - been so excited since managing to get my rear headrests of Ronnie and his breaking MV6

Party Time :D


Welcome to the club Markiec & Martin  :)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Markie on 19 August 2006, 23:07:28
Thanks Tunnie ( lol founder member)

wonder who is next.....
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 19 August 2006, 23:12:00
Quote
Thanks Tunnie ( lol founder member)

wonder who is next.....

Think TD & AA are getting close....

I think I should be the Club Chairman...  :)
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Auto Addict on 19 August 2006, 23:15:08
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Thanks Tunnie ( lol founder member)

wonder who is next.....

Think TD & AA are getting close....

I think I should be the Club Chairman...  :)

TD and AA, who will be the first?

Only Chairman tunnie, not President?
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Taxi_Driver on 20 August 2006, 07:47:38
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Quote
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Thanks Tunnie ( lol founder member)

wonder who is next.....

Think TD & AA are getting close....

I think I should be the Club Chairman...  :)

TD and AA, who will be the first?

Only Chairman tunnie, not President?


I'll let you get there b4 me AA  ;)

Chairman?..President?...Thought Admiral would have better.....as the meega can be a bit of a barge  ;D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Auto Addict on 20 August 2006, 07:55:42
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Quote
Quote
Quote
Thanks Tunnie ( lol founder member)

wonder who is next.....

Think TD & AA are getting close....

I think I should be the Club Chairman...  :)

TD and AA, who will be the first?

Only Chairman tunnie, not President?


I'll let you get there b4 me AA  ;)

Chairman?..President?...Thought Admiral would have better.....as the meega can be a bit of a barge  ;D

Can't stand the pace TD? ;D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Taxi_Driver on 20 August 2006, 09:15:55
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Quote
Quote
Quote
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Thanks Tunnie ( lol founder member)

wonder who is next.....

Think TD & AA are getting close....

I think I should be the Club Chairman...  :)

TD and AA, who will be the first?

Only Chairman tunnie, not President?


I'll let you get there b4 me AA  ;)

Chairman?..President?...Thought Admiral would have better.....as the meega can be a bit of a barge  ;D

Can't stand the pace TD? ;D

Quite true AA, I sit down a lot  ;D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: TheBoy on 20 August 2006, 10:39:59
Well done Markiec and Martin :D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: tunnie on 20 August 2006, 11:16:38
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Quote
Quote
Quote
Thanks Tunnie ( lol founder member)

wonder who is next.....

Think TD & AA are getting close....

I think I should be the Club Chairman...  :)

TD and AA, who will be the first?

Only Chairman tunnie, not President?


I'll let you get there b4 me AA  ;)

Chairman?..President?...Thought Admiral would have better.....as the meega can be a bit of a barge  ;D


Thats an idea:

Admiral of the Expert Facelift Omega Fleet  ;D
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Markjay on 20 August 2006, 15:47:05
Quote
I agree AA  ;D
Ok 1st question......
You get your EML on now and then when starting from hot and the car goes into limp mode
You read the fault codes and among others its complaining of cam sensor
Do you....

A) Do nothing and hope everything will be alright
B) Take it to Vx dealer and let them charge you mega amounts changing parts at random and not actually fix the problem
C) Change the cam sensor
D) Flog it to Ronnie for £50

Surely, the correct answer is:

E) Post a question in omegaowners.com

???


Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Martin_1962 on 20 August 2006, 16:36:57
I reckon AA then TD
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Jay w on 20 August 2006, 17:28:27
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Ok..

If it was a project car and i needed flog it to make a profit, then Option A (not that i just did that of course ::)

If it was a fleet car and not me paying the bill Option B.

If it was my facelift then Option C.

Knowing Ronnie he would beat me down to a tenner for it!

Sorry, wrong answers, all posts will now be reset (only I don't have the power)  :(

 ;D ;D


Muhahaa, besides i out-rank you. I am an "expert"  :P

Hmmm....Expert.....two syllabls

Ex - Has been, A former
Pert - small, Impudently bold; saucy

Sorry, couldn't resist
Title: Re: 500 posts, the results.....
Post by: Allenm on 20 August 2006, 17:49:41
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Quote
Quote
Quote
Ok..

If it was a project car and i needed flog it to make a profit, then Option A (not that i just did that of course ::)

If it was a fleet car and not me paying the bill Option B.

If it was my facelift then Option C.

Knowing Ronnie he would beat me down to a tenner for it!

Sorry, wrong answers, all posts will now be reset (only I don't have the power)  :(

 ;D ;D


Muhahaa, besides i out-rank you. I am an "expert"  :P

Hmmm....Expert.....two syllabls

Ex - Has been, A former
Pert - small, Impudently bold; saucy

Sorry, couldn't resist

Ex as is has-been
Spurt as in drip under pressure!  ;)

Couldn't resist either ;D