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1

Omega General Help / Re: 2.2dti fuel consumption

« on: 11 August 2009, 23:04:14 »

Mine does 33/35 local and around 40/42 on a speed legal run.  Faulty egr would bring on engine management light.  Probably mass airflow meter as this does not bring on light.  Try unplugging it to see if it runs any better.  If it does, the maf is faulty

2

Omega General Help / Re: Drivers door solenoid

« on: 07 August 2009, 21:53:59 »

Check the wires that run through the front of the door next to the hinges. Could be that some of them have broken or stranded with the constant flexing opening and shutting the door.  Better to check that before spending your hard earned!
Good luck

3

Omega General Help / Omega power upgrade?

« on: 07 August 2009, 21:43:45 »

Need a bit more power out of my 2.2 dti manual for towing.  Chipping seems to be the way forward or is it?  Trawling the web everyone claims their product is better than everybody elses.  I don't fancy posting my ECU off to some faceless spotty nerd with a laptop in his garden shed!
Any advice/testimonials would be much appreciated :-/ :-/

4

Omega General Help / Re: Air con evaporator

« on: 07 August 2009, 22:03:05 »

Yup, removing the pollen filter and spraying down the inlet is the way to go!  Have had some success using a Lavender air freshener placed in the air intake for 'niffy' cars.  A dodge my mate Arfur Daly showed me!!!!!

5

Omega General Help / Re: gates timing belt

« on: 07 August 2009, 21:08:49 »

Gates belts are supplied as OE to several manufacturers and are supplied over the counter as replacements.
Gates also supply 're-branded' ie your genuine 'branded' GM belt will have a Gates part No printed on it somewhere.
You have the best of stuff, mate!  Price not bad either. [smiley=thumbsup.gif]

6

General Car Chat / Re: Blasted speed ramps!

« on: 02 August 2009, 19:31:02 »

Definately knocked tracking out!
Quick way to check is (on level ground) set steering wheel to the straight ahead then from the front of the car, sight the front tyre walls (at hub level) through to the rear tyre walls.  They should all be in line.  My guess is that you will probably see a portion of tyre tread which would indicate   that the tracking is toeing out.  Another method is get a plank of wood longer than the wheelbase of the car and again at hub level, rest the plank against the front tyre walls.  Slide the plank back till it reaches the back tyre.  The tracking is ok if the plank lines up with the back tyrewall.  If the plank touches the tread, the tracking is toeing out, if the plank misses the back tyre completely, the tracking is toeing in.
Make sure you have a straight bit of wood!

Best of luck [smiley=thumbsup.gif]

7

General Car Chat / Re: MOT tomorrow

« on: 29 July 2009, 23:31:07 »

 Hey watch it!  I'm an MOT tester and can assure you that most of us are human.  Mind you, a bottle of Grouse whisky under the drivers seat works wonders!!  [smiley=angry.gif]

8

General Car Chat / Re: Question for the MOT testers

« on: 29 July 2009, 23:52:29 »

Gee, I don't think you guys like caravans or mot testers!  My IQ is bigger than my age - does that get me blackballed on the 3 strikes count? [smiley=cry.gif]

9

General Discussion Area / Re: Looks like Schumacher has bottled it

« on: 11 August 2009, 23:57:24 »

How can he have a sore neck?  I always thought it was made of solid brass.

10

General Discussion Area / University Study (joke)

« on: 11 August 2009, 23:47:49 »

An english university has conducted a survey as to why the bell end of the aroused male member is of a larger diameter than the remainder of the shaft.

Some concluded that it was to increase the pleasure of the female.

Others thought that it was to increase the pleasure of the male.................................................................................................................................................................................................they finally discovered that it was to stop young lads from punching themselves in the face!!!!
 :-/

11

General Discussion Area / Re: Objectum sexuality?

« on: 07 August 2009, 23:12:48 »

Wots wrong with Susan Boyle?  She's Scottish and quite attractive if you're into older women!!

12

General Discussion Area / Re: Objectum sexuality?

« on: 07 August 2009, 23:08:58 »

Blimey!  Wouldn't like to go home to that with an opened wage packet!!!

13

General Discussion Area / Geriatric Romance (joke)

« on: 07 August 2009, 22:42:38 »

Old Tam had been an item with Wee Aggie at he old folks home for several years when without any warning he announced that he was finishing with her.

Wee Aggie was quite shocked at the sudden announcement and, with a tear in her eye, asked him why?

Well said Old Tam, I am going to be seeing Big Betty in room 13.

Ohh Tam! said Wee Aggie, you can't, she is fat, pot ugly and smelly!

Aye, said Tam, but she has Parkinsons!!!!

14

General Discussion Area / Re: That'll teach me "NOT"

« on: 07 August 2009, 22:23:13 »

Reminds me of a mate of mine a few years back.  He was having 'naughties' in the bushes down the Park with a willing young wench and got stung between his b-m hole and his goolies!  When we got him to Casualty there wasn't a dry eye in the place!!!!!   

15

General Discussion Area / Re: Hello everyone

« on: 04 August 2009, 00:40:17 »

Cheers Vamps!  Partially converted. Get rid of the static and hit the road.  Join the club and get to a rally.  You cannot beat 30 like minded couples, one table and 30 sets of keys to choose from, but don't come (sic) in a motorhome - we hate them!