Omega Owners Forum
Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: Guppy on 12 June 2008, 09:32:22
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> There's always one. This has got to be one of the funniest things in a long
> time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired This is a true
> story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording
> monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk
> employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect
> organization for "Termination without Cause".
>
> Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I
> know why they record these conversations!):
>
> Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
> Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
> Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
> Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the
> words went away."
> Operator: "Went away?"
> Caller: "They disappeared."
> Operator: "Hmm So what does your screen look like now?"
> Caller: "Nothing."
> Operator: "Nothing??"
> Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
> Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
> Caller: "How do I tell?"
> Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
> Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
> Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
> Caller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept
> anything I type."
> Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
> Caller: "What's a monitor?"
> Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a
> TV. Does it have a little light
> that tells you when it's on??"
> Caller: "I don't know."
> Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where
> the power cord goes
> into it. Can you see that??"
> Caller: "Yes, I think so."
> Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's
> plugged into the wall.
> Caller: "Yes, it is."
> Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that
> there were two cables
> plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
> Caller: "No."
> Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and
> find the other cable."
> Caller: "Okay, here it is."
> Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely
> into the back of your
> computer."
> Caller: "I can't reach."
> Operator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"
> Caller: "No."
> Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way
> over??"
> Caller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle -
> it's because it's dark."
> Operator: "Dark??"
> Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I
> have is coming in from the window.
> Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
> Caller: "I can't."
> Operator: "No? Why not??"
> Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
> Operator: "A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it
> licked now. Do you still
> have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your
> computer came in??"
> Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
> Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up
> just like it was when
> you got it. Then take it back to the store you
> bought it from."
> Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
> Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
> Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell
> them??"
> Operator: "Tell them you're too f*%king stupid to own a
> computer!!!!!"
:y
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;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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eeeeee
must be 15 years since I read that one ;D
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;D ;D ;D
Although not quite as bad as that one, out Helpdesk gets call from similarly intellectually challenged customers who shouldn't be anywhere near a PC or anything remotely technical. ::)
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That could have been me ::) ;D
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That could have been me ::) ;D
This wasn't you as well was it? ;D
> Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop".
> Customer: "OK".
> Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?".
> Customer: "No".
> Tech Support: "OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
> Customer: "No".
> Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until
> this point?".
> Customer: "Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote
> 'click'".
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That could have been me ::) ;D
This wasn't you as well was it? ;D
> Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop".
> Customer: "OK".
> Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?".
> Customer: "No".
> Tech Support: "OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
> Customer: "No".
> Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until
> this point?".
> Customer: "Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote
> 'click'".
Its sounds familiar ::) ;D
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we had a customer trying to use the mouse as a foot pedal....
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we caught a czech guy yesterday stealing a pair of trainers from tk maxx...he just walked in tried em on and walked out again!!!! we only copped him cause the cam operator in the cabin is eagle eyed and spotted that he had clean trainers on and dirty clothes!!!! copped him just b4 he got into the works van he and his fellow countyrmen where using he was not a happy bloke when the cops arested him..... :o and the reason he did it?? his old trainers where not fashionable enough..this guy probably earns a fortune here compared to what he earnt in the czech republic so why do it?? and why don`t our gov deport em??? commit a crime whilst here or seeking asylum you go straight back thats what i`d do to em if they cant abide by our laws then deport em an let the people who want to legally earn a living get on with our lives.... >:( >:( rant over
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;D Sorry but my god thats random ;D
Yeah sounds like he needs deporting.
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[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oI2xK6zbaoI&feature=related[/media]
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;D ;D ;D
Although not quite as bad as that one, out Helpdesk gets call from similarly intellectually challenged customers who shouldn't be anywhere near a PC or anything remotely technical. ::)
I'm hopeless with my computer, ca'nt send an email without being told a problems been encountered. I only surf on here my ebay acc. youtube etc. but i drive an artic for a living, get out from behind your desks & try it, you'll kill someone before you get lost (no sat nav) needed.
Many of my jobs are collecting old machinery from manufacturing cos. that have gone bust because everything's cheaper abroad. These places will be levelled & yet another retail park with the same stores will be built on said site, another clone if you like. I do'nt work behind a desk, i'm actually out there seeing it first hand. Sorry all but this really riles me. At this rate we'll have nothing left except offices, plastic family carveries, & allied carpets etc.
I'm nearly as bad as some of the posted examples computer wise, i'm NOT intellectually challenged ( managed a few O levels, RSA & LCC's) so if i'm being looked down on for not being computer literate then come out & say so & i'll leave you all to it. >:(
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[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oI2xK6zbaoI&feature=related[/media]
Absolutely brilliant - my heart bleeds for the guy. But I do wish some of his colleagues didn't treat everyone who comes on the line like a complete idiot. Some of us are moderately competent and wouldn't be on the phone if there wasn't something broken at their end >:(
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I prefer to think of myself as moderately incompetent. I know just enough to get myself in trouble. I then hve to 'switch it off and back on again'. That's what they tell you to do when you talk to the IT guys anyway. ;D
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Trying very hard not to rant anymore but sometimes those with some pc ability tend to look down on the rest of us. Given that we can all do something better i find it a little condescending.
Still managed not to rant though!!! :y
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Trying very hard not to rant anymore but sometimes those with some pc ability tend to look down on the rest of us. Given that we can all do something better i find it a little condescending.
Still managed not to rant though!!! :y
Ranters Anonymous have a six-point plan for getting through each day without 'losing it'.......doesn`t blinkin`well work for me though;` bunch of incompetent barstewards......`kin tossers! ;D ;D ;D
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Take two of these before bed time. You'll feel much better in the morning. :y
(http://www.bloggers.it/mrclarendon/itcommenti/chillpill.jpg)
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Take two of these before bed time. You'll feel much better in the morning. :y
(http://www.bloggers.it/mrclarendon/itcommenti/chillpill.jpg)
:o OMG....250,000 mg; that`s a BIG pill to swallow! ;D
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Take two of these before bed time. You'll feel much better in the morning. :y
(http://www.bloggers.it/mrclarendon/itcommenti/chillpill.jpg)
:o OMG....250,000 mg; that`s a BIG pill to swallow! ;D
But, maybe not a bitter one? ;)
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;D ;D ;D
Although not quite as bad as that one, out Helpdesk gets call from similarly intellectually challenged customers who shouldn't be anywhere near a PC or anything remotely technical. ::)
I'm hopeless with my computer, ca'nt send an email without being told a problems been encountered. I only surf on here my ebay acc. youtube etc. but i drive an artic for a living, get out from behind your desks & try it, you'll kill someone before you get lost (no sat nav) needed.
Many of my jobs are collecting old machinery from manufacturing cos. that have gone bust because everything's cheaper abroad. These places will be levelled & yet another retail park with the same stores will be built on said site, another clone if you like. I do'nt work behind a desk, i'm actually out there seeing it first hand. Sorry all but this really riles me. At this rate we'll have nothing left except offices, plastic family carveries, & allied carpets etc.
I'm nearly as bad as some of the posted examples computer wise, i'm NOT intellectually challenged ( managed a few O levels, RSA & LCC's) so if i'm being looked down on for not being computer literate then come out & say so & i'll leave you all to it. >:(
Hey Guy........calm down and chill, no offence was intended. I think the whole point is that the people some of these helpdesks have to deal with are SUPPOSED to be reasonably clever and PC literate as it's their job to operate certain systems within their organisations. Nobody on here is impying that you're being looked down on because your not a PC expert. :o
It's no different if I were to climb in to an artic and attempt to drive it........you would probably be laughing your head off. ;)
Please don't take it so seriously.....it was just a bit of light hearted stuff. :)
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;D ;D ;D
Although not quite as bad as that one, out Helpdesk gets call from similarly intellectually challenged customers who shouldn't be anywhere near a PC or anything remotely technical. ::)
I'm hopeless with my computer, ca'nt send an email without being told a problems been encountered. I only surf on here my ebay acc. youtube etc. but i drive an artic for a living, get out from behind your desks & try it, you'll kill someone before you get lost (no sat nav) needed.
Many of my jobs are collecting old machinery from manufacturing cos. that have gone bust because everything's cheaper abroad. These places will be levelled & yet another retail park with the same stores will be built on said site, another clone if you like. I do'nt work behind a desk, i'm actually out there seeing it first hand. Sorry all but this really riles me. At this rate we'll have nothing left except offices, plastic family carveries, & allied carpets etc.
I'm nearly as bad as some of the posted examples computer wise, i'm NOT intellectually challenged ( managed a few O levels, RSA & LCC's) so if i'm being looked down on for not being computer literate then come out & say so & i'll leave you all to it. >:(
Sorry AmigoV6 wasn't meant to offend anyone, by no means an expert myself :(
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Hello Guppy. I tend to engage mouth before brain sometimes then look back & realize my mistake :-[ but hold my hands up. Whoops!.
Bob. We all know you're a good natured bloke & meant no ill will with your post. We've met up a couple of times @ meets & look forward to doing so again mate.
Closest i've got to a rant since i declared to stop getting a bee in my bonnet a while ago.
My heart's in the right place but my gob lets me down! ::)
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As a side line to my main job, I offten offer tech help to field engineers...
Some of the blinders they come out with...
My faviout been (and we hear it daily)
"Why do you need it plugging into the phone line? its got WiFi!"
(The WiFi router is in side our unit..., hence it supply's the WiFi to the site)
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Hello Guppy. I tend to engage mouth before brain sometimes then look back & realize my mistake :-[ but hold my hands up. Whoops!.
Bob. We all know you're a good natured bloke & meant no ill will with your post. We've met up a couple of times @ meets & look forward to doing so again mate.
Closest i've got to a rant since i declared to stop getting a bee in my bonnet a while ago.
My heart's in the right place but my gob lets me down! ::)
;) We know, matey! :y
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Hello Guppy. I tend to engage mouth before brain sometimes then look back & realize my mistake :-[ but hold my hands up. Whoops!.
Bob. We all know you're a good natured bloke & meant no ill will with your post. We've met up a couple of times @ meets & look forward to doing so again mate.
Closest i've got to a rant since i declared to stop getting a bee in my bonnet a while ago.
My heart's in the right place but my gob lets me down! ::)
;) We know, matey! :y
:-* :D
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Hello Guppy. I tend to engage mouth before brain sometimes then look back & realize my mistake :-[ but hold my hands up. Whoops!.
Bob. We all know you're a good natured bloke & meant no ill will with your post. We've met up a couple of times @ meets & look forward to doing so again mate.
Closest i've got to a rant since i declared to stop getting a bee in my bonnet a while ago.
My heart's in the right place but my gob lets me down! ::)
No worries, glad you are ok about it, you definately wouldn't want to see me to try and drive an artic! :-* :y
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Hello Guppy. I tend to engage mouth before brain sometimes then look back & realize my mistake :-[ but hold my hands up. Whoops!.
Bob. We all know you're a good natured bloke & meant no ill will with your post. We've met up a couple of times @ meets & look forward to doing so again mate.
Closest i've got to a rant since i declared to stop getting a bee in my bonnet a while ago.
My heart's in the right place but my gob lets me down! ::)
Really pleased to see you haven't taken it to heart Guy. :y You're a bl00dy nice bloke yourself and look forward to seeing you at the next meet. :y Shame you can't make it to the Lakes though.
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Many of my jobs are collecting old machinery from manufacturing cos. that have gone bust because everything's cheaper abroad. These places will be levelled & yet another retail park with the same stores will be built on said site, another clone if you like. I do'nt work behind a desk, i'm actually out there seeing it first hand. Sorry all but this really riles me. At this rate we'll have nothing left except offices, plastic family carveries, & allied carpets etc.
You're right here, though, mate. I cannot abide the cloned town centres that we have now with the same sh!t in every town and gawd knows what would happen if we, as a nation, had to look after ourselves these days. A nation full of people who specialise in pushing a mouse around a desk and selling fridges 'aint going to last too long. >:(
Kevin