Omega Owners Forum

Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: Vamps on 12 November 2008, 22:06:40

Title: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: Vamps on 12 November 2008, 22:06:40: [size=14]A mature lady gets pulled over for speeding
Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
Traffic Cop: Yes ma'am, I'm afraid you were speeding.

Older Woman: Oh, I see.
Traffic Cop: Can I see your license please?

Older Woman: Well, I would give it to you but I don't have one.

Traffic Cop: Don't have one?

Older Woman: No. I lost it 4 years ago for drunk driving.

Traffic Cop: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Older Woman: I can't do that.

Traffic Cop: Why not?

Older Woman: I stole this car.

Traffic Cop: Stole it?

Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Traffic Cop: You what!?
Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see

The traffic cop looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car while calling for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!
The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: My colleague here tells me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Older Woman: Murdered the owner? Are you serious?!

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
The traffic cop is quite stunned.

Officer 2: My colleague claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

The officer examines the license quizzically.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, but I am puzzled, as I was told by my officer here that you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner!

Older Woman: Bet the lying bastard told you I was speeding, too. [/size]

;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: Andy B on 12 November 2008, 22:10:43: *groan* ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: Richie London on 12 November 2008, 22:11:57: ;D ;D :y
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: Elite Pete on 12 November 2008, 22:13:10: ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: michael.d.s. on 12 November 2008, 22:59:13: fantastic , wife just wet herself ;D :D ;D :D :y
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: The Barge Captain on 12 November 2008, 23:10:08: Nice, simple, and fairly clean :y
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: Mr Skrunts on 12 November 2008, 23:33:16: PMSL, like that one. ;D ;D
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: amigov6 on 12 November 2008, 23:50:16: Excellent!!!!!!!!!! :y
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: Lizzie_Zoom on 13 November 2008, 00:43:38: ;D ;D ;D :y
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: kris9128 on 13 November 2008, 08:44:07: excellent ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: LJay on 13 November 2008, 11:18:02: Funny! Read something similar in FHM! ;D
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: cem_devecioglu on 13 November 2008, 11:45:17: clever woman ::) ;D :y
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: waspy on 13 November 2008, 12:07:12: That's a good one. TPMS ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: Johnboy0811 on 13 November 2008, 17:58:35: I like it not sure it would work in real life but I'll bet there is someone somewhere that will try it :y
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: STMO123 on 13 November 2008, 19:02:50: Very good ;D
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: mars on 13 November 2008, 19:28:59: ;D ;D ;D :y
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: Dusty on 13 November 2008, 20:37:57: ;D ;D ;D ;D :-*
Title: Re: A joke from swmbo. Safe.
Post by: sluggi on 13 November 2008, 22:03:22: :D :D :D :y