Omega Owners Forum
Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: amigov6 on 11 December 2008, 21:39:18
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Man get's pulled over for speeding. The police car follows the speeder into a lay by & is shocked to see the man get out of the car, let his dog out, & smack it a few times. Outraged the cop says "Right. Not only am i going to charge you with speeding but cruelty to that poor animal, WTF do you think you were doing?"
" I'm really sorry" says the man "But he just ate my tax disc"!
I'll see myself out. :D
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Mr Cadbury and Miss Rowntree met on a Double Decker, it was After Eight.
She was from Quality Street, he was a Fisherman's Friend. On the way they stopped at a Yorkie Bar, he had a Rum and Butter, she had a Wine Gum.
He asked her name, 'Polo, I'm the one with the hole' she said.'I'm the one with the nuts,' he thought! Then he touched her Milky Way.
They checked in to a hotel, and went straight to the bedroom. Mr Cadbury turned out the light for a bit of Black Magic. It wasn't long before he slipped his hand into her Snickers and felt her Cream Egg.
He showed her his Curly Wurly and Tic Tacs. Miss Rowntree wasn't keen to have any Jelly Babies, so she let him take a trip down Bourneville Boulevard via her Party Ring.
He was quite pleased as he always fancied a bit of Fudge. It was a Magic Moment as she let out a scream of Turkish Delight. When he pulled out, his fun size Mars Bar felt a bit Crunchie. She wanted more, but he needed Time Out, however, he noticed her Pink Wafers looked very appetizing. He did a Twirl, had a Picnic in her Sherbet Dip and finished off by giving her a Gob Stopper!
Unfortunately, Mr Cadbury then had to go home to his wife, Caramel. Sadly he was soon to discover he had VD. It turned out Miss Rowntree had been with Bertie Basset who apparently had Allsorts!!!
::) ::) ::)
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i heard she was Lion on the grass having a Picnic and discovered a finger of Fudge was just enough ;)
and I'll get my coat ;D
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Mr Cadbury and Miss Rowntree met on a Double Decker, it was After Eight.
She was from Quality Street, he was a Fisherman's Friend. On the way they stopped at a Yorkie Bar, he had a Rum and Butter, she had a Wine Gum.
He asked her name, 'Polo, I'm the one with the hole' she said.'I'm the one with the nuts,' he thought! Then he touched her Milky Way.
They checked in to a hotel, and went straight to the bedroom. Mr Cadbury turned out the light for a bit of Black Magic. It wasn't long before he slipped his hand into her Snickers and felt her Cream Egg.
He showed her his Curly Wurly and Tic Tacs. Miss Rowntree wasn't keen to have any Jelly Babies, so she let him take a trip down Bourneville Boulevard via her Party Ring.
He was quite pleased as he always fancied a bit of Fudge. It was a Magic Moment as she let out a scream of Turkish Delight. When he pulled out, his fun size Mars Bar felt a bit Crunchie. She wanted more, but he needed Time Out, however, he noticed her Pink Wafers looked very appetizing. He did a Twirl, had a Picnic in her Sherbet Dip and finished off by giving her a Gob Stopper!
Unfortunately, Mr Cadbury then had to go home to his wife, Caramel. Sadly he was soon to discover he had VD. It turned out Miss Rowntree had been with Bertie Basset who apparently had Allsorts!!!
::) ::) ::)
LOL i like that one ;D ;D ;D ;)
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Good ones!! ;D ;D
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Mr Senior Service (a Bachelor) took Miss Player along the Strand, down Pall Mall and round Piccadilly. They went past Buckingham palace and down Park Drive where he took her behind Benson & Hedges and laid her on a Gold Leaf. He took out his Rothmans King Size and placed it in her Golden Virginia and enjoyed an Old Shag. Nine months later produced a little Cadet, it just shows “Senior Service Satisfies”
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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Mr Cadbury and Miss Rowntree met on a Double Decker, it was After Eight.
She was from Quality Street, he was a Fisherman's Friend. On the way they stopped at a Yorkie Bar, he had a Rum and Butter, she had a Wine Gum.
He asked her name, 'Polo, I'm the one with the hole' she said.'I'm the one with the nuts,' he thought! Then he touched her Milky Way.
They checked in to a hotel, and went straight to the bedroom. Mr Cadbury turned out the light for a bit of Black Magic. It wasn't long before he slipped his hand into her Snickers and felt her Cream Egg.
He showed her his Curly Wurly and Tic Tacs. Miss Rowntree wasn't keen to have any Jelly Babies, so she let him take a trip down Bourneville Boulevard via her Party Ring.
He was quite pleased as he always fancied a bit of Fudge. It was a Magic Moment as she let out a scream of Turkish Delight. When he pulled out, his fun size Mars Bar felt a bit Crunchie. She wanted more, but he needed Time Out, however, he noticed her Pink Wafers looked very appetizing. He did a Twirl, had a Picnic in her Sherbet Dip and finished off by giving her a Gob Stopper!
Unfortunately, Mr Cadbury then had to go home to his wife, Caramel. Sadly he was soon to discover he had VD. It turned out Miss Rowntree had been with Bertie Basset who apparently had Allsorts!!!
::) ::) ::)
Tears in my eyes ;D ;D ;D ;D
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Man get's pulled over for speeding. The police car follows the speeder into a lay by & is shocked to see the man get out of the car, let his dog out, & smack it a few times. Outraged the cop says "Right. Not only am i going to charge you with speeding but cruelty to that poor animal, WTF do you think you were doing?"
" I'm really sorry" says the man "But he just ate my tax disc"!
I'll see myself out. :D
Good one ;D ;D ;D :y
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Both brilliant and don't we need jokes like this at the mo with what is going on! 8-) 8-) 8-) ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;)
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very good, nice to have a giggle on a dull friday morning. ;)
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very good, nice to have a giggle on a dull friday morning. ;)
Good to have a giggle evey day of the week. ;D ;D
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very good, nice to have a giggle on a dull friday morning. ;)
Good to have a giddle evey day of the week. ;D ;D
whats one of them then? :D
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very good, nice to have a giggle on a dull friday morning. ;)
Good to have a giddle evey day of the week. ;D ;D
whats one of them then? :D
Like I said in the other thread, all going to pot. Eye sights going as well, and it's not as if the 2 keys are actually side by side. :-[
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very good, nice to have a giggle on a dull friday morning. ;)
Good to have a giddle evey day of the week. ;D ;D
whats one of them then? :D
Like I said in the other thread, all going to pot. Eye sights going as well, and it's not as if the 2 keys are actually side by side. :-[
Poor Skruntie! You do make me laugh though! :y
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very good, nice to have a giggle on a dull friday morning. ;)
Good to have a giddle evey day of the week. ;D ;D
whats one of them then? :D
Like I said in the other thread, all going to pot. Eye sights going as well, and it's not as if the 2 keys are actually side by side. :-[
Poor Skruntie! You do make me laugh though! :y
Sign of advancing years m8 - wait to when you forget why you are looking at some of your pics!!! :o :o :o ;D ;D
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very good, nice to have a giggle on a dull friday morning. ;)
Good to have a giddle evey day of the week. ;D ;D
whats one of them then? :D
Like I said in the other thread, all going to pot. Eye sights going as well, and it's not as if the 2 keys are actually side by side. :-[
Poor Skruntie! You do make me laugh though! :y
In that case Ljay I have achieved my goal. As I think the whole world would be better with a giddle giggle every day, far too many unhappy and grumpy people in the world.
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Excellent jokes ;D ;D ;D