Omega Owners Forum

Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: mantagte on 23 July 2009, 10:09:02

Title: couple of jokes
Post by: mantagte on 23 July 2009, 10:09:02
 What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell..... She's got a hand- grenade in her mouth.


 Do you ever notice that when you're driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a F***ing maniac.
Title: Re: couple of jokes
Post by: Mr Skrunts on 23 July 2009, 10:14:46
Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes twinkle?

A: Shine a flashlight in their ear.
Title: Re: couple of jokes
Post by: mantahatch on 23 July 2009, 10:17:12
Quote
What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell..... She's got a hand- grenade in her mouth.


 Do you ever notice that when you're driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a F***ing maniac.

Brilliant, and so utterly true.
Title: Re: couple of jokes
Post by: Jimbob on 23 July 2009, 10:34:06
 ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: couple of jokes
Post by: STMO999 on 23 July 2009, 10:59:09
Quote
What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell..... She's got a hand- grenade in her mouth.


 Do you ever notice that when you're driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a F***ing maniac.

Thread's titled 'A couple of jokes'. That, my friend is actually a very large truism ;D ;D
Title: Re: couple of jokes
Post by: Chris_H on 23 July 2009, 11:50:59
Quote
What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell..... She's got a hand- grenade in her mouth.


 Do you ever notice that when you're driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a F***ing maniac.
I met that maniac yesterday.

Was out on the bike and let a 350Z past.  He was quite restrained at that point.  Came to a roundabout out in the country, by which time he was on the tail of about 5 cars plodding along near the National Limit.

We all went right and that's a 250yard stretch where I know that if I start early I can outdrag most cars and get past two at most before the blind R/H bend.

He waits and loses 75yards before flooring it.  Must have been at about 75mph within 30yards of the bend and still not clear to pull in!  His life (and unknown others) absolutely in the lap of the gods.  Skill, experience and dexterity didn't come into it - he was doing killer speed on the wrong side of a two-lane country road at a blind right-hander.

I still can't get my head round it!  As you can probably tell.
Title: Re: couple of jokes
Post by: STMO999 on 23 July 2009, 11:59:27
Quote
Quote
What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell..... She's got a hand- grenade in her mouth.


 Do you ever notice that when you're driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a F***ing maniac.
I met that maniac yesterday.

Was out on the bike and let a 350Z past.  He was quite restrained at that point.  Came to a roundabout out in the country, by which time he was on the tail of about 5 cars plodding along near the National Limit.

We all went right and that's a 250yard stretch where I know that if I start early I can outdrag most cars and get past two at most before the blind R/H bend.

He waits and loses 75yards before flooring it.  Must have been at about 75mph within 30yards of the bend and still not clear to pull in!  His life (and unknown others) absolutely in the lap of the gods.  Skill, experience and dexterity didn't come into it - he was doing killer speed on the wrong side of a two-lane country road at a blind right-hander.

I still can't get my head round it!  As you can probably tell.

On road wars last night. Two way, narrow road with an unbroken white line in the direction of travel, about 250 yds to the brow of a hill.

Effing great 32 footer pulls out to overtake a slower wagon. It seemed to take an eternity for him to pass and if anything had been coming over the hill...well.

I was cringeing waiting for the big bang to happen.

He got done for careless driving, I'd have said it was definately dangerous driving.