Omega Owners Forum
Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: rob in gib on 17 October 2009, 20:02:58
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Baptising an Irishman
A Irishman is stumbling through the woods, totally
drunk, when he comes upon a preacher
baptising people in the river.
He proceeds to walk into the water and
subsequently bumps into the preacher...
The preacher turns around and is almost
overcome by the smell of alcohol,
whereupon he asks the drunk,
'Are you ready to find Jesus?'
The drunk shouts, 'Yes, oi am.'
So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the water.
He pulls him up and asks the drunk,
'Brother have you found Jesus?'
The drunk replies, 'No, oi haven't found Jesus.'
The preacher shocked at the answer, dunks him
into the water again for a little longer.
He again pulls him out of the water and asks
again, 'Have you found Jesus me brother?'
The drunk again answers, 'No,oi I haven't
found Jesus.'
By this time the preacher is at his wits end
and dunks the drunk inthe water again ---
but this time holds him down for about
30 seconds and when he begins kicking
his arms and legs he pulls
him up. The preacher again asks the
drunk, 'For the love of God have you
found Jesus?'
(Are you ready for this????)
The drunk wipes his eyes and catches his
breath and says to the preacher,
'Are you sure this is where he fell in?'
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An Irisman and an englishman are sat beside each other on a plane.The Englishman says "Pat,would you like to play a little game to pass the time on the flight" ? "What game is that"? asks Pat.
Well, says the Englishman,"I ask you questions,and every time you dont know the answer you give me a fiver,then you ask me questions and every time I cant answer I give you £500".
"OK I will have a go" says Pat.
The Englishman asks Pat if he knows how high the Eiffel tower is.Pat doesnt say a word,just pulls a fiver out of his pocket and gives it to him.The Englishman then asks Pat if he knows how deep the Atlantic ocean is at its deepest point.Pat doesnt say a word,he just pulls another fiver from his pocket and gives it to the Englishman.This goes on for another 4 questions until Pat says "it must be my turn now".He asks the Englishman if he knows what goes up a hill with 4 legs and comes back down with 3 ? The Englishman racks his brain,then fires up his laptop and trawls through various search engines but cant find a thing.Eventually he gives the Irishman £500 and says "you must tell me,what does go up a hill with 4 legs and come back down with 3"? Pat doesnt say a word,he just reaches in his pocket and pulls out a fiver and hands it to the Englishman ;) ::) :D ;D
I,ll get me coat. ;D
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all very good ;D ;D :y
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Good stuff, as usual guys! ;D :y
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;D ;D ;D ;D ;D :y :y
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;D ;D ;D keep 'em coming :y
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Very Good ;D ;D ;D :y