Omega Owners Forum
Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: Varche on 28 November 2009, 11:36:09
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1. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.
3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with lef hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of 10.
4. Quickly retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.
5. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, holding front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold cat's head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
6. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.
7. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with its head just visible from below spouse's armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force cat's mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
8. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply band-aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
9. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
10. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Throw T-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
11. Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbour who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.
12. Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table. Find heavy duty welding gloves from shed. Force cat's mouth open with 12 mm spanner. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Hold head vertically and pour 1/2 pint of water down throat to wash pill down.
13. Get spouse to drive you to A and E; sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Stop by furniture shop on way home to order new table.
14. Arrange for vet to make a housecall.
V
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;D ;D ;D Yep, that about covers it ;D ;D :y
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;D ;D
I generally smash the pills to become dust and mix it with milk and spray into their mouth with a small injector otherwise they never gulp it ;D >:(
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Not what i'd do. Bloody things shitting all over my lawn >:( >:( >:( >:(
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lol
one of ours used to think pills were cat treats...easy!
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;D ;D ;DBrilliant :y
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;D ;D ;DBrilliant :y
Agreed :y have had to use many of those moves in the past on a previous kitty ;D ;D
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That made me cry with laughter! It's taken 3 of us to get pills down our cat at times and we all lost blood!!! :y
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;D class
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Wish it were true .. then the cats wouldn't get their meds and they'd die ... :)
Vermin... the lot of them .... oh for the legal use of a 12 bore :y :y :y
(going into hiding now I've re-read this .... ) :)
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Wish it were true .. then the cats wouldn't get their meds and they'd die ... :)
Vermin... the lot of them .... oh for the legal use of a 12 bore :y :y :y
(going into hiding now I've re-read this .... ) :)
Don't worry about me, but little Miss Vamps will have a view on the subject........ :D :D :D
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Wish it were true .. then the cats wouldn't get their meds and they'd die ... :)
Vermin... the lot of them .... oh for the legal use of a 12 bore :y :y :y
(going into hiding now I've re-read this .... ) :)
I'm really quite shocked Entwood :( :(
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Wish it were true .. then the cats wouldn't get their meds and they'd die ... :)
Vermin... the lot of them .... oh for the legal use of a 12 bore :y :y :y
(going into hiding now I've re-read this .... ) :)
I'm really quite shocked Entwood :( :(
Most amusing. ;D
Crush pill and sprinkle over a slice of ham, feed ham to cat while fighting the other cat off from eating it as well.
What happened to Waspy by the way?
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Wish it were true .. then the cats wouldn't get their meds and they'd die ... :)
Vermin... the lot of them .... oh for the legal use of a 12 bore :y :y :y
(going into hiding now I've re-read this .... ) :)
I'm really quite shocked Entwood :( :(
Most amusing. ;D
Crush pill and sprinkle over a slice of ham, feed ham to cat while fighting the other cat off from eating it as well.
What happened to Waspy by the way?
Ham? Miss Vamps and I had cheese and biscuits last night, on the sofa, as we cleared many crumbs fell off Miss Vamps pj's to the floor ::) was it the dog that picked them up, no, twas the bloomin cat...... :D :D :D
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My cat is diabetic so I have to inject it in the mornings, its much easier than trying to use pills
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Made me laugh :y
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Excellent and very true!!
I once mixed up my own and my cat's tablets and took the cat's antibiotics for three days without realising.
The cat got better, I started to like fish again.