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Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: smithpa7 on 22 July 2010, 00:20:47

Title: Another Joke...Sorry if it has been up before
Post by: smithpa7 on 22 July 2010, 00:20:47
12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres ever aired on British TV and radio



1. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - 'This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother.'

2. New Zealand Rugby Commentator - 'Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him.'

3. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator - 'And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria .  I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!'

4. Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 - 'Ah, isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew.'

5. US PGA Commentator - 'One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them ..... Oh my god !! What have I just said??'

6. Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on 'Time Team Live' said: 'You'd eat beaver if you could get it.'

7. A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, 'So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?' Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard!

8. Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: 'Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69 yesterday.'

9. Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on 'Look North' said: 'There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this. '

10 Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on 'Sky Sports': 'Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets.'

11. Michael Buerk on watching Philippa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer for warmth during BBC1's UK eclipse coverage remarked: 'They seem cold out there.  They're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts.'

12. Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open: 'Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny; other weeks he prefers to do it by himself.'

Title: Re: Another Joke...Sorry if it has been up before
Post by: Jimbob on 22 July 2010, 07:41:12
Old....but still very funny  ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Another Joke...Sorry if it has been up before
Post by: Amego52 on 22 July 2010, 07:50:13
Number 11 all the way  ;D
Title: Re: Another Joke...Sorry if it has been up before
Post by: Banjax on 22 July 2010, 10:33:10
oldies but goldies  ;D :y
Title: Re: Another Joke...Sorry if it has been up before
Post by: jerry on 22 July 2010, 14:40:57
hadnt heard some of these before;very good ;D ;D :y
Title: Re: Another Joke...Sorry if it has been up before
Post by: I_want_an_Omega on 22 July 2010, 15:29:43
I was in a meeting with the RSPCA a couple of years ago. We were talking about an IT project and I was presenting a number of options as to how an implementation could be done.

I innocently said - "of course, there is more than one way of skinning this particular cat".  :o

There was a very long pause & then they all laughed - it was a  genuine mistake on my part and they thankfully saw the funny side.

Another colleage wasn't as lucky - when addressing BTP (British Transport Police) he made a statement that they "wern't a proper Police Force". He couldn't undestand why the atmosphere suddenly got very icy.  :-X
Title: Re: Another Joke...Sorry if it has been up before
Post by: Amigo on 22 July 2010, 20:27:36
7 & 11. Priceless!!! ;D
Title: Re: Another Joke...Sorry if it has been up before
Post by: hercules on 22 July 2010, 20:34:27
first time ive seen em ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Another Joke...Sorry if it has been up before
Post by: PhilRich on 22 July 2010, 21:30:32
Priceless, all of 'em  ;D :y