Omega Owners Forum
Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: dbug on 28 August 2010, 17:14:44
-
I'm not normally suspicious but the wife told me yesterday that ZGavin from Autoglass came round and injected that special resin into her crack......................she hasn't even got a car!!
I hate crushing pills up and putting them in my Aunt’s dinner. I feel sneaky, but if I ever got her pregnant I wouldn't be able to forgive myself.
Matt Lucas's ex-partner hanged himself this week. Matt is said to be distraught but on a lighter note, he is now the only gay in the village
A little girl walks into her parents' bedroom.
" Holy Cow " she screams "And YOU want ME to see a doctor about sucking my thumb...!!
Wee Irish boy crying by the side of the road.
A man asks "What's wrong?"
Boy says "Me Ma is dead"
"Oh bejaysus" the man says "Do you want me to get Father O'Riley ?"
Wee boy replies"No thanks Mister, sex is the last ting on me moind roight now."
Just had a call from a charity asking me to donate some of my clothes to the starving people of the world. Told them to "Go away". Anyone who fits into my clothes isn't starving!!!
Japanese scientists have now created a digital camera with such a fast speed that it's now possible to take a photograph of a woman with her gob shut.
Turned on my SatNav and it said 'Bear Left' and there was the zoo. How good is that?
I hate all this terrorist business. I used to love the days when you could look at an unattended bag on the train or bus and think " I'm having that!"
Man lost in a hot air balloon over Ireland . He looks down and sees a farmer and shouts to him, "Where am I?"
The Irish farmer looks up and shouts back "You can't kid me ya b'stard, you're in that rather basket!"
Paddy is cleaning his rifle and accidentally shoots his wife. He dials 999.
Paddy says "It's my wife, I've accidentally shot her. I've killed her"
Operator "Please calm down sir. Can you first make sure she really is dead?"
CLICK,BANG
Paddy "OK, done that, what next?
-
listen for the sound of tumbleweed rolling on by..................terribly sorry old boy, I am a little tired
-
Had a little giggle :)
-
listen for the sound of tumbleweed rolling on by..................terribly sorry old boy, I am a little tired
That's constructive for your 4th post :y
-
listen for the sound of tumbleweed rolling on by..................terribly sorry old boy, I am a little tired
That's constructive for your 4th post :y
More like b****y rude - if you don't like jokes don't read em >:(
-
I liked 'em ;D :y
-
listen for the sound of tumbleweed rolling on by..................terribly sorry old boy, I am a little tired
i do like jokes, but the words you wrote weren't funny. Kind of like Jim Davidson, but minus the cheeky cockney character. Just my opinion, free speech etc. :y
That's constructive for your 4th post :y
More like b****y rude - if you don't like jokes don't read em >:(
-
;D ;D ;D ;D
-
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
-
;D ;D ;D :y
-
8-)
Very good. Even got me a couple of glowers off Mrs PeteG.
-
listen for the sound of tumbleweed rolling on by..................terribly sorry old boy, I am a little tired
That's constructive for your 4th post :y
More like b****y rude - if you don't like jokes don't read em >:(
Now an ex-member ;D ;D
Some are older than the hills but I did chuckle at a couple of them ;)
-
;D ;D1st time ive seen em
-
;D ;D1st time ive seen em
same here, loved them all. as for upsetting someone, hard luck, dont click on the joke page
-
;D ;D ;D :y
-
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D