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Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: PhilRich on 19 November 2010, 16:16:44

Title: Double Entendres
Post by: PhilRich on 19 November 2010, 16:16:44
12 of the finest (unintentional) double-entendres ever aired on British TV and radio:

1. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - 'This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother.'

2. New Zealand Rugby Commentator - 'Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him.'

3. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator - 'And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!'

4. Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 - 'Ah, isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew.'

5.. US PGA Commentator - 'One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that, before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them. Oh my god !! What have I just said??'

6. Carenza Lewis about finding food in the Middle Ages on 'Time Team Live' said: 'You'd eat beaver if you could get it.'

7. A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, 'So Bob, where's that eight inches you promised me last night?' Not only did HE have to leave the set,but half the crew did too, because they were laughing so hard!

8. Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: 'Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69 yesterday.'

9. Clair Frisby talking about a jumbo hot dog on 'Look North' said: 'There's nothing like a big hot sausage inside you on a cold night like this. '

10. Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on 'Sky Sports': 'Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets.'

11. Michael Buerk on watching Philippa Forrester cuddle up to a male astronomer for warmth during BBC1's UK eclipse coverage remarked: 'They seem cold out there. They're rubbing each other and he's only come in his shorts.'

12. Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open: 'Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny; other weeks he prefers to do it by himself.'

 :y
Title: Re: Double Entendres
Post by: bob.dent on 19 November 2010, 16:23:26
 ;D ;D ;D

Some corkers there but No. 4 really made me lol  :y
Title: Re: Double Entendres
Post by: Debs. on 19 November 2010, 16:41:57
 ;D Excellent! :y

I recall a 1970`s G.P commentator saying:
"Kenny Roberts is thrusting up Barry Sheene`s rear end" :o
"Sheene`s got to watch he doesn`t get tossed off....again"
::)
Title: Re: Double Entendres
Post by: Banjax on 19 November 2010, 16:58:56
superb - the "8 inches" one I've definitely seen on telly - hilarious  ;D ;D

what about the cricket commentary: "The batsman's Holding, the bowler's Willie" I think the two commentators couldn't speak for sniggering after that  ;D
Title: Re: Double Entendres
Post by: millwall on 19 November 2010, 17:00:44
absolute quality ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Double Entendres
Post by: Pitchfork on 19 November 2010, 17:18:31
Quote
superb - the "8 inches" one I've definitely seen on telly - hilarious  ;D ;D

what about the cricket commentary: "The batsman's Holding, the bowler's Willie" I think the two commentators couldn't speak for sniggering after that  ;D
That was Brian Johnstone
Title: Re: Double Entendres
Post by: Jimbob on 19 November 2010, 18:36:11
 ;D ;D ;D

A girl at work asked me for an example of a double entendre....So I gave her one.
Title: Re: Double Entendres
Post by: waspy on 19 November 2010, 18:42:27
Excellent ;D ;D ;D ;D :y
Title: Re: Double Entendres
Post by: Debs. on 19 November 2010, 19:32:03
Quote
A girl at work asked me for an example of a double entendre....So I gave her one.

 ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Double Entendres
Post by: Richgm on 20 November 2010, 13:39:52
I've just driven past a local pub. Sign outside said
Quote
Poker in the rear
is it my perverted sense humour or does anyone else see another meaning to this?
Title: Re: Double Entendres
Post by: panderson on 20 November 2010, 13:50:22
Many, many years ago on a BBC1 magazine type show called "Nationwide", the guest cookery slot was Fanny & Johnny Craddock. They were demonstrating how to cook doughnuts.
At the end of the show, the anchormans parting shot was "......and I hope your doughnuts turn out like Fannies"!!!!!!!!!!
Wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it myself :y
Title: Re: Double Entendres
Post by: cam2502 on 20 November 2010, 14:59:31
brilliant ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Double Entendres
Post by: Osprey on 20 November 2010, 16:22:04
Old, but standing the test of time IMHO:

(http://i1006.photobucket.com/albums/af181/astclair2/FamilyPlanning.jpg)

 :)

Title: Re: Double Entendres
Post by: maria on 20 November 2010, 17:00:26
Good un ;D ;D ;D ;D :y
Title: Re: Double Entendres
Post by: Banjax on 21 November 2010, 10:33:55
Quote
Many, many years ago on a BBC1 magazine type show called "Nationwide", the guest cookery slot was Fanny & Johnny Craddock. They were demonstrating how to cook doughnuts.
At the end of the show, the anchormans parting shot was "......and I hope your doughnuts turn out like Fannies"!!!!!!!!!!
Wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it myself :y


i thought it was Blue Peter - but I remember seeing it on "it'll be alright on the night" or some such  ;D ;D ;D

definitely Blue Peter when, after a piece by the female presenter on victorian brass door attachments, Simon Groom said "Thanks Lesley....what a fantastic pair of knockers!"  ;D


Title: Re: Double Entendres
Post by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 21 November 2010, 11:46:30
Quote
;D Excellent! :y

I recall a 1970`s G.P commentator saying:
"Kenny Roberts is thrusting up Barry Sheene`s rear end" :o
"Sheene`s got to watch he doesn`t get tossed off....again
"[/i] ::)


I believe this may have been at the 1979 British GP...Debs........A very close finish with King Kenny triumphant...... if memory serves.... ;) :-* :-*