Omega Owners Forum
Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: ians on 30 May 2007, 16:47:27
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An Irishman wants a job, but the foreman won't hire him until he passes a little math test.
Here is your first question, the foreman said. "Without using numbers, represent the number 9."
"Without numbers?" The Irishman says, "Dat is easy." And proceeds to draw three trees.
(http://i187.photobucket.com/albums/x222/ijs10/trees1.jpg)
"What's this?" the boss asks?
"Ave you got no brain? Tree and tree and tree make nine," says the Irishman.
"Fair enough," says the boss. "Here's your second question. Use the same rules, but this time the number is 99."
The Irishman stares into space for a while, then picks up the picture that he has just drawn and makes a smudge on each tree. "Ere you go."
(http://i187.photobucket.com/albums/x222/ijs10/trees2.jpg)
The boss scratches his head and says, "How on earth do you get that to represent 99?"
"Each of da trees is dirty now. So, it's dirty tree, and dirty tree, and dirty tree. Dat is 99."
The boss is getting worried that he's going to actually have to hire this Irishman, so he says, "All right, last question. Same rules again, but represent the number 100."
The Irishman stares into space some more, then he picks up the picture again and makes a little mark at the base of each tree and says, "Ere you go. One hundred."
(http://i187.photobucket.com/albums/x222/ijs10/trees3.jpg)
The boss looks at the attempt. "You must be nuts if you think that represents a hundred!"
The Irishman leans forward and points to the marks at the base of each tree and says, "A little dog come along and crap by each tree. So now you got dirty tree and a turd, dirty tree and a turd, and dirty tree and a turd, which makes one hundred."
"So, when do I start?"
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;D ;D ;D ;D :y
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Very good Ian - I'd hire him ;D
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;D ;D ;D ;D
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Now, I have to spoil this party and complain. Would we be as happy if this was about a Jew, or black guy? This is blatent racisim guys and should not be on here. Luckily, I am no longer a Mod but I expect one will be along very soon who I think may be unhappy about this too.
Don't get me wrong, I love jokes. But this type has no place here. [smiley=thumbdown.gif]
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Very good :y, and neither me, my brothers Patrick and Michael, nor my father Seamus are offended at all. At all.
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Racist - when the subject proves to be clever, resourcefull and beats the system - no.
Anyway the best Irish jokes come from Irishmen
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;D ;D
That's not racist! It's just identifying a particular dialect. I've misunderstood a few Irish people because of the way they pronounce their words and had a laugh about it later. The best one was when the director of the company I was working for in Dublin said that he didn't want any 'trill seekers'. I thought he was expecting me to head for the pet shop!! He thought it was hysterical and it put me on a good footing with him.
There've been many incidences of Scottish accents and/or percieved customs brought up on here and I didn't see anyone jumping to my or any other 'Jocks' defence.
Not that there was any needed, any time it was taken as good humour, and no offence was either intended or taken.
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;D ;D
That's not racist! It's just identifying a particular dialect. I've misunderstood a few Irish people because of the way they pronounce their words and had a laugh about it later. The best one was when the director of the company I was working for in Dublin said that he didn't want any 'trill seekers'. I thought he was expecting me to head for the pet shop!! He thought it was hysterical and it put me on a good footing with him.
There've been many incidences of Scottish accents and/or percieved customs brought up on here and I didn't see anyone jumping to my or any other 'Jocks' defence.
Not that there was any needed, any time it was taken as good humour, and no offence was either intended or taken.
I meant to offend you Rod, but you just ignored me >:(
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You're doing it again :(
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This is blatent racisim guys and should not be on here
:-?
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;D ;D ;D :y
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You're doing it again :(
Soaray, whit did ye say sumhing ther!?!?!? ;D
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Now, I have to spoil this party and complain. Would we be as happy if this was about a Jew, or black guy? This is blatent racisim guys and should not be on here. Luckily, I am no longer a Mod but I expect one will be along very soon who I think may be unhappy about this too.
Don't get me wrong, I love jokes. But this type has no place here. [smiley=thumbdown.gif]
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D :y :y
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Now, I have to spoil this party and complain. Would we be as happy if this was about a Jew, or black guy? [smiley=thumbdown.gif]
...or a sheep dog ;)
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Now, I have to spoil this party and complain. Would we be as happy if this was about a Jew, or black guy? [smiley=thumbdown.gif]
...or a sheep dog ;)
or a man in a flat cap
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Now, I have to spoil this party and complain. Would we be as happy if this was about a Jew, or black guy? [smiley=thumbdown.gif]
...or a sheep dog ;)
or a man in a flat cap
Or Bla Bla Rainbow sheep for that matter ;D ;D
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;D ;D ;D :y
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Ok, enough... :)
Joke passed the Irish offence test (SWMBO is Irish...) ;)
However, I can see this going doing a political slant so I am locking this thread before things go where they shouldn't...