Omega Owners Forum

Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: Amigo on 25 June 2011, 20:44:35

Title: Mum.
Post by: Amigo on 25 June 2011, 20:44:35

Over the years a few folk on here have shared the loss of parents or loved ones with us all. Despite our ins & outs support & wishes have always been given & in doing so we hope we're doing what little we can to help. I've left a few sympathies & each time it's reminded me my folks are getting on & i'm dreading the phone call.

   Just had it. My brother Phil called. Mum swore Dad to secrecy but he had to tell me so he got Phil to do it. I phoned Dad back & Mum's got cpod or something which restricts the breathing...i've had it explained to me but i'm not with it at the moment but to sum up she's not going to get better. Dad's got one foot out of the door already.

   Phoned work who were great & am popping down to Sussex later next week. Crying, sniffing & feel weak as a kitten.

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: albitz on 25 June 2011, 20:52:47

You have my full sympathy Guy.I can still remember that call which I had been dreading - will never forget it, and the flight over to Ireland afterwards. The only time I havent been eager to get off a plane. Its never easy, no matter what age you are.
Boys (and grown men) always love their mums.
Go and see her as much as you can in the near future mate. I missed my last chance and will always regret it. :y

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: TheBoy on 25 June 2011, 20:53:55

Guy, I hope it works out for her. Good luck

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Omegatoy on 25 June 2011, 20:54:25

Always hits you hard news like that mate,
thing is you have to be strong for her and your dad, hope the visit goes as well as can be expected.

am in a similar situation with me dad so can feel your pain

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: STMO123 on 25 June 2011, 20:55:09

So sorry to hear that Guy. It comes to us all mate, sooner or later, Try and be brave for her.



http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chronic_obstructive_pulmonary_disease

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Turk on 25 June 2011, 20:56:44

I know what you're saying. The phone call and period after is a bit of a daze, almost surreal. Thoughts with you matey.

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Debs. on 25 June 2011, 21:00:22

 :( I`m truly-gutted for you, Guy.........Please consider yourself tele-hugged and keep 'positive'. :-*

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: albitz on 25 June 2011, 21:00:49

I would add, try to give your dad as much support as possible, it will be him who feels it more than everyone else. :y

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Jimbob on 25 June 2011, 21:07:28

All the best to you and yours  :y

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: LJay on 25 June 2011, 21:38:35

Thinking of you Guy, here if you need to talk. :-*

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: saltyone on 25 June 2011, 21:42:50

my thoughts and prayers are with you. my mum has advanced alzheimer's and i dread the phone call .
 stay strong for your dad and spend as much time with your mum as you can.
 i know it will be hard seeing her ill and you will want to blubber like a kid . don't hold back its only natural . good luck  :(

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Vamps on 25 June 2011, 21:46:37

So Sorry to hear you news Guy, I will be thinking of you :) :)

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: blackviper90210 on 25 June 2011, 21:48:32

My thoughts and best wishes to you and your family...

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: CaptainZok on 25 June 2011, 21:49:07

All the best to you and your Mum mate.
On the brighter side a workmate was diagnosed with COPD a good few years ago and though he's eventually had to give  up work he seems to be managing quite well.

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: gstylebaby on 25 June 2011, 21:56:35

Sorry to here your sad news mate :'( :'(.  Thinking of you and yours mate. ;)

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: joff on 25 June 2011, 22:03:08

Been there not long ago, thinking off you and your family at this time, chin up :(

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: hercules on 25 June 2011, 22:24:47

as everyone else says guy,the bastard is though some day our parents do die and it stinks but your a big fellow and your hearts bigger(thats why you have lots of friends behind you) :y

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: the alarming man on 26 June 2011, 01:27:42

Quote

Over the years a few folk on here have shared the loss of parents or loved ones with us all. Despite our ins & outs support & wishes have always been given & in doing so we hope we're doing what little we can to help. I've left a few sympathies & each time it's reminded me my folks are getting on & i'm dreading the phone call.

   Just had it. My brother Phil called. Mum swore Dad to secrecy but he had to tell me so he got Phil to do it. I phoned Dad back & Mum's got cpod or something which restricts the breathing...i've had it explained to me but i'm not with it at the moment but to sum up she's not going to get better. Dad's got one foot out of the door already.

   Phoned work who were great & am popping down to Sussex later next week. Crying, sniffing & feel weak as a kitten.

Although it is a serious problem left untreated it is manageable through drugs and or oxygen..my mum was diagnosied with it earlier this year...once they got mums dose of oxygen correct she was let out of hospital...see her today and she is fine
IT IS NOT ALL DOOM AND GLOOM but best of luck :y

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Del Boy on 26 June 2011, 08:48:20

Sorry to hear this Guy, my dad also has COPD, and has had it for sometime, but it's manageable with the correct treatment, but I will say it'll slow her down a lot. Hope she is ok mate, give her my best, and I hope you're ok :y

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Amigo on 26 June 2011, 20:31:27

Thanks everyone. Phoned today & had to make out to Mum she was telling me something new...not easy! Her version is she's got a tumour on a rib that's invading a lung. She's had some chemo which has'nt worked & been told there's no point putting her through any more as she's too weak to go to hospital. She has what she calls an unbearable head pain...not a migraine, a horrible taste in her mouth which has put her off her food & drink & she only get's up for an hour or two around lunchtime every day.

   This started in March this year before which she was still driving, gardening, walking the dogs etc.

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Amigo on 26 June 2011, 20:36:23

Quote

Thanks everyone. Phoned today & had to make out to Mum she was telling me something new...not easy! Her version is she's got a tumour on a rib that's invading a lung. She's had some chemo which has'nt worked & been told there's no point putting her through any more as she's too weak to go to hospital. She has what she calls an unbearable head pain...not a migraine, a horrible taste in her mouth which has put her off her food & drink & she only get's up for an hour or two around lunchtime every day.

   This started in March this year before which she was still driving, gardening, walking the dogs etc.

Forgot to say they have private healthcare policies so are looked after at home as Dad is 81 & can only do so much plus it's taking the last of the fight out of him.


   I feel so useless. I can't protect her or fight it off for her. I should be able to do something but i just can't.

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Lazydocker on 26 June 2011, 20:46:15

Quote

Quote

Thanks everyone. Phoned today & had to make out to Mum she was telling me something new...not easy! Her version is she's got a tumour on a rib that's invading a lung. She's had some chemo which has'nt worked & been told there's no point putting her through any more as she's too weak to go to hospital. She has what she calls an unbearable head pain...not a migraine, a horrible taste in her mouth which has put her off her food & drink & she only get's up for an hour or two around lunchtime every day.

   This started in March this year before which she was still driving, gardening, walking the dogs etc.

Forgot to say they have private healthcare policies so are looked after at home as Dad is 81 & can only do so much plus it's taking the last of the fight out of him.


   I feel so useless. I can't protect her or fight it off for her. I should be able to do something but i just can't.

Guy, I feel your pain and am gutted for you. We were only down that way this weekend for a wedding. If I hadn't been so knackered last night I'd have seen this and offered to pop round for you :(

If there's anything I/we can do to help out, just shout :y

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: cem_devecioglu on 26 June 2011, 20:49:31

sorry to hear this Amigo.. dont know what to say..  :(

stay with her as much as possible..

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Kevin Wood on 26 June 2011, 23:44:20

Our thoughts are with you, Guy.

Kevin

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Nickbat on 26 June 2011, 23:54:19

Quote

Our thoughts are with you, Guy.

Kevin

Mine, too.

Nick

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: skyblue on 27 June 2011, 23:43:24

Im feeling the pain you are going through at the mo and I know how much it hurts.

 One bit of advice I was given yrs ago which has always stuck with me is ,,,,,,,, Dont bottle it up , let it out   as no one will think any less of you if you do shed a tear  or two at this horrible time.

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: jonnycool on 28 June 2011, 08:18:03

Don't know what to say mate, just show your Mum how much you love and care for her while you still can

Jon

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Andy B on 28 June 2011, 18:45:38

Our thoughts are with you too.

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: M on 28 June 2011, 21:18:05

Thoughts are with you Guy, very best wishes from us all here mate

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: hotel21 on 29 June 2011, 00:10:43

A mum can get many sons.

A son only gets one Mum.

Look after her......   :y

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: jerry on 29 June 2011, 06:03:06

only just seen your post , my thoughts are with you at this difficult time. I know its hard because you have to try and be "strong" for both your mum and dad but its important that you have someone to express your emotions to as well. Take care and best wishes to you and yours
                                        jerry

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: tigers_gonads on 29 June 2011, 20:52:13

Sorry to hear about that Guy

Might be a idea to have a word with her doctor and find out whats happening ( from the horses mouth so too speak )

A good friend of mine lost his mam last year to cpod.
She lived with it for 12 years with a bit of tlc but I know all cases are different.

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Amigo on 01 July 2011, 01:51:31

I'm here in West Sussex now at at the dining room table on the lappy. My sister Yvette is here helping dad in the night. Care saff & cleaners arrive again tomorrow. Mum now only get's out of bed to be washed or toileted & has a box thing with a needle feed in her shoulder as she can't eat so she gets water & nutrients. I'm off to pick my son up on saturday so he can says his goodbyes to hs Grandma.

  I held it together when i was with her but lost it completely when i got to the kitchen.

    Stuff this for a lark, it's just not right & so sudden.

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Debs. on 01 July 2011, 06:02:42

Quote

it's just not right & so sudden.

 :'( So sorry, Guy! :'(

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Gaffers on 01 July 2011, 06:11:25

My thoughts are with you. and your family :'(

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Jimbob on 01 July 2011, 07:09:06

Sorry its all gone downhill so fast  :'(

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: omegod on 01 July 2011, 07:34:59

Just make sure you spend as much time as you can with her and say everything you want to,I near talked the ears off my mum even though she was in a coma,prob would have told me to shut up if she could.

Look after yourself by making sure you eat,drink and rest as she needs you strong. 

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Lazydocker on 01 July 2011, 08:37:39

Guy,

Our thoughts are with you all at this very difficult time. Big hug from Emma and a mop down with a wipe!

If we can do anything to help or you want someone to sound off at, give me a shout.

Paul & Emma

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Marks DTM Calib on 01 July 2011, 09:12:51

Well done for keeping it together Guy, your mum will appreciate it and be very proud.

Thinking of you all

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Nickbat on 01 July 2011, 09:20:00

So sad. My thoughts are with you.

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: SP_3.2 on 01 July 2011, 10:35:07

Our thoughts are with you and the family Guy. 

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: tigers_gonads on 01 July 2011, 11:06:14

Sorry Guy  :o :(

Family time now  :(
Thoughts with you and your family  :(

Steve & family.

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Amigo on 03 July 2011, 21:30:46

Thanks again all of you. Left on thursday & just got back. She's got worse every day i've been there. I want her to go to sleep forever now & it'll be a relief when she does, she wants to as well, it's no life for her. Dad's a vet & animals are spared this mercy, she ran the ship & is now bed bound in  pain & feeling constantly sick with no hope of recovery. What kind of humanity/dignity is that?.

  Dad broke this afternoon before i left saying he should've gone first. Seeing him go i lost it as well & all i could say was this way he's saving her the heartbreak of grieving for him. There's been tears, hugs & still a few laughs in the family. Friends & neighbours have been fantastic down there & up here as have work...not to forget you lot!!! :-*

   If anyone wants a lump in the throat i could do with a break!!! I'll shut up now & thanks again all of you, Guy.

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Debs. on 03 July 2011, 21:36:44

Quote

Thanks again all of you. Left on thursday & just got back. She's got worse every day i've been there. I want her to go to sleep forever now & it'll be a relief when she does, she wants to as well, it's no life for her. Dad's a vet & animals are spared this mercy, she ran the ship & is now bed bound in  pain & feeling constantly sick with no hope of recovery. What kind of humanity/dignity is that?.

  Dad broke this afternoon before i left saying he should've gone first. Seeing him go i lost it as well & all i could say was this way he's saving her the heartbreak of grieving for him. There's been tears, hugs & still a few laughs in the family. Friends & neighbours have been fantastic down there & up here as have work...not to forget you lot!!! :-*

   If anyone wants a lump in the throat i could do with a break!!! I'll shut up now & thanks again all of you, Guy.

 :'( No words........just sincerely-caring wishes and sending a tele-hug! :-*

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: Lazydocker on 03 July 2011, 21:50:29

Guy, you've done well :y

Fingers crossed that the dreadful situation draws to a conclusion

Title: Re: Mum.
Post by: PhilRich on 03 July 2011, 22:24:07

Myself & Sylvia are so sorry to hear of your Mums illness & your obvious distress Guy :'(
We've both been through it with our Parents in the recent past & if things take a natural course, all of us at some time have to go through the pain & trauma of losing our Mums & Dads. As others have said, try to be there for her & your Dad as much as you possibly can in the time ahead, talk to her about anything & everything, and above all don't  be  afraid to  tell her now what's in your heart & mind! Don't forget too that crying is a natural way for us to release the unbearable tension that these situations place   on us & there is no shame in a man crying! God Bless Guy.