Omega Owners Forum
Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: I_want_an_Omega on 21 November 2011, 18:53:06
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Has anyone got any experience of going to the Doctor with this.
My OOF absence recently has been due to cr*p @ work and it now seems to me that I'm in the crosshairs.
Comments appreciated - Thanks
Rob
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Im signed off with depression at the moment mainly due to family issues and personal stress but work has played a part in it. Im an area manager for a national car valeting company and the stress of the job over the last 2 months was the final trigger. You don't believe the docs when they say its an illness but it is and one that needs treatment. Ie rest and anti depressants in my case.
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A mixture of work stress ( business going t*ts up / refuseing to cut my losses and get out ) and a few family issues led to me totally loosing it a few years ago :(
I got into trouble with the law and very nearly went down for it :'(
At the time, I didn't see the signs ( and would have punched anybody who tried to tell me ) that I was turning into a complete nutter :(
I never saw a doctor but i'm under no illusions ( after talking to people I knew at the time who were scared stiff of me ) that if I had gone to see one, I would have been sectioned.
Me, I spent 6 months, sleeping on the floor of a customer / friends house, drinking myself to sleep every night untill instinct took over. I relised I had hit the bottom and decieded it was time to re build my head / life.
Nowdays, i'm still a stress head / have the odd rant ( as some on here will have worked out ;D) but I am slowly turning things around :y
As for seeing the doc, If I ever found myself in that position, I would bang on his door and talk to him :y
You've heard some of this before of me Rob.
If you want a chat over a coffee or a beer, give us a ring mate :y
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no idea about your job :-\ but can briefly say being short of time and high expectations are main factors..
last week there were 2 projects that I could earn good money .. and very limited time ahead, I got really stressed after the phone call.. how I could I finish in time, and I refused both of them, even I'm tight financially..Reason simple, wont be able to finish them on time, good luck for who accepted it..
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It's a tinker of a thing. Be aware your employers have a duty of care to support you and it's wise to see if they have supported you recently with effective supervision, appraisals etc. If you have mentioned being unduly stressed they should have responded by changing the situation in some way.
If you put a sicknote in with work related stress on they will likely refer you to occupational health but they should be impartial and will give you reasonable timescales and advice to your employer how to help you to get yourself back on track. Either way keep your chin up and keep perspective on where your at :y
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A mixture of work stress ( business going t*ts up / refuseing to cut my losses and get out ) and a few family issues led to me totally loosing it a few years ago :(
I got into trouble with the law and very nearly went down for it :'(
At the time, I didn't see the signs ( and would have punched anybody who tried to tell me ) that I was turning into a complete nutter :(
I never saw a doctor but i'm under no illusions ( after talking to people I knew at the time who were scared stiff of me ) that if I had gone to see one, I would have been sectioned.
Me, I spent 6 months, sleeping on the floor of a customer / friends house, drinking myself to sleep every night untill instinct took over. I relised I had hit the bottom and decieded it was time to re build my head / life.
Nowdays, i'm still a stress head / have the odd rant ( as some on here will have worked out ;D) but I am slowly turning things around :y
As for seeing the doc, If I ever found myself in that position, I would bang on his door and talk to him :y
You've heard some of this before of me Rob.
If you want a chat over a coffee or a beer, give us a ring mate :y
Thanks Steve - much appreciated.
I have a meeting with HR tomorrow so let's see what the professional has to say. I'm suspecting fabricated issues from a couple of junior management creeps. I'm going to have to try & keep my cool as these aren't normal people. I was told to "get over it" when was given the all clear from my Cancer false alert 18 months ago, and there was no interest at all in my lads post Afhgan situation.
I guess you dont get jobseekers if you just quit do you?
Wish me luck
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A mixture of work stress ( business going t*ts up / refuseing to cut my losses and get out ) and a few family issues led to me totally loosing it a few years ago :(
I got into trouble with the law and very nearly went down for it :'(
At the time, I didn't see the signs ( and would have punched anybody who tried to tell me ) that I was turning into a complete nutter :(
I never saw a doctor but i'm under no illusions ( after talking to people I knew at the time who were scared stiff of me ) that if I had gone to see one, I would have been sectioned.
Me, I spent 6 months, sleeping on the floor of a customer / friends house, drinking myself to sleep every night untill instinct took over. I relised I had hit the bottom and decieded it was time to re build my head / life.
Nowdays, i'm still a stress head / have the odd rant ( as some on here will have worked out ;D) but I am slowly turning things around :y
As for seeing the doc, If I ever found myself in that position, I would bang on his door and talk to him :y
You've heard some of this before of me Rob.
If you want a chat over a coffee or a beer, give us a ring mate :y
Thanks Steve - much appreciated.
I have a meeting with HR tomorrow so let's see what the professional has to say. I'm suspecting fabricated issues from a couple of junior management creeps. I'm going to have to try & keep my cool as these aren't normal people. I was told to "get over it" when was given the all clear from my Cancer false alert 18 months ago, and there was no interest at all in my lads post Afhgan situation.
I guess you dont get jobseekers if you just quit do you?
Wish me luck
If you leave you can claim ESA Earnings and support allowance. Basically if your too ill to work regardless of your current employment status.
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A mixture of work stress ( business going t*ts up / refuseing to cut my losses and get out ) and a few family issues led to me totally loosing it a few years ago :(
I got into trouble with the law and very nearly went down for it :'(
At the time, I didn't see the signs ( and would have punched anybody who tried to tell me ) that I was turning into a complete nutter :(
I never saw a doctor but i'm under no illusions ( after talking to people I knew at the time who were scared stiff of me ) that if I had gone to see one, I would have been sectioned.
Me, I spent 6 months, sleeping on the floor of a customer / friends house, drinking myself to sleep every night untill instinct took over. I relised I had hit the bottom and decieded it was time to re build my head / life.
Nowdays, i'm still a stress head / have the odd rant ( as some on here will have worked out ;D) but I am slowly turning things around :y
As for seeing the doc, If I ever found myself in that position, I would bang on his door and talk to him :y
You've heard some of this before of me Rob.
If you want a chat over a coffee or a beer, give us a ring mate :y
Thanks Steve - much appreciated.
I have a meeting with HR tomorrow so let's see what the professional has to say. I'm suspecting fabricated issues from a couple of junior management creeps. I'm going to have to try & keep my cool as these aren't normal people. I was told to "get over it" when was given the all clear from my Cancer false alert 18 months ago, and there was no interest at all in my lads post Afhgan situation.
I guess you dont get jobseekers if you just quit do you?
Wish me luck
Tossers >:( >:(
Thats why I loved been my own boss. I didn't have to keep looking over my shoulder
Nope
Nothing for 3 months :(
You have had a lot of stuff to deal with over the last few years and you got through it :y
Just smile, be polite and call it the way you see it but don't jump over the desk and tw*t him ;D ;D
All the best mate and remember ................ don't let the barstewards grind you down ;)
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i'm on anti's too. and although most people won't talk about it i believe a lot of people are on them.
the scary thing is you can be depressed and not know the reason why. everything can feel like it's pointless.
however, if you get perscribed the drugs (citalopram is the main one) then after a few weeks it will give you that urge to get up in the morning and have a good day and be happy...........like when you were 16 and nothing mattered! :y
good luck mate. :y :y
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Omegod is right when he points out that your employer has a duty of care here but employers vary quite greatly as to how they interpret this duty! Too frequently in the past I have seen people being signed off for "stress" by their GP and you just think WTF, but everyone is different and deals with stuff differently. Like many I know Im not so bad with dealing with crap at work now and can cope with some crap at home but a combination of both at the same time....Ive been there, trust me, and eventually was forced to take some time off because it just got to the point where I was physically/mentally/emotionally f"cked and Ive always been a bit of a workaholic so initially I felt really guilty about it but I was just getting buried. The key thing then is to take some time out not just to rest (though your body will demand that of you anyhow) but to be very proactive and try and step outside of yourself and get a better perspective on the things that are causing the stress and then look at things you can do to change those situations. Obviously some things you will have more control over than others but you need to try and formulate a plan of action. A couple of weeks off in itself wont solve anything because when you go back nothing will have changed and you'll soon be back to square one again. You need to make changes. Catharsis is great, let off steam/get hammered but you know the old saying "dontjust bitch about it DO something about it!" Talk to your employer and get them to help you on this. Stress can be a very serious condition and whilst sleeping tablets/anti depression pills have their place my personal advice would be to really try and understand the various (rarely is it a single cause) factors and what you can do about them. Your employer should be "understanding" and endeavour to make all "reasonable" changes where appropriate for you and ultimately they would normally do this through their occupational health dept. It is an exceedingly tough economic climate at the present but sadly too many employers forget the importance of their workforce in weathering this let alone the costs in terms of investment. If you are in a union seek their support too. As youve no doubt found, stress from one corner often then spills into other areas so you need to take some action sooner rather than later.Best wishes mate :y
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I also suffered from stress and depression after divorcing. Beeing loosen everything, money, house, job all of my material existency I realised that if I don't make any harmony between the one who I want to be and the one who I'm able to be I'll never be happy again. It's taken me for five - six years...Often we are declining to overestimate and overload ourself...Nowadays I do not want to be any kind of specialist and do not want to get so much money like before just want to be a happy man and I can tell you proudly already I am ! Poorer but happier and I swear it was a very good business... :y And added yet a hun poem's words : "Under you is hell, above you is heaven, inside you is THE LADDER" Never give up Rob, find the ladder and climb up, nobody can do it without you!
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I also suffered from stress and depression after divorcing. Beeing loosen everything, money, house, job all of my material existency I realised that if I don't make any harmony between the one who I want to be and the one who I'm able to be I'll never be happy again. It's taken me for five - six years...Often we are declining to overestimate and overload ourself...Nowadays I do not want to be any kind of specialist and do not want to get so much money like before just want to be a happy man and I can tell you proudly already I am ! Poorer but happier and I swear it was a very good business... :y And added yet a hun poem's words : "Under you is hell, above you is heaven, inside you is THE LADDER" Never give up Rob, find the ladder and climb up, nobody can do it without you!
Your understanding of the English is getting better and better, keep it up and you will be like cem from Turkey.... :y :y :y
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oof spirit at it's best. i never realised you were all budding psychologists... thought you were stoopid spanner heads :D ;D ;D ;D
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I also suffered from stress and depression after divorcing. Beeing loosen everything, money, house, job all of my material existency I realised that if I don't make any harmony between the one who I want to be and the one who I'm able to be I'll never be happy again. It's taken me for five - six years...Often we are declining to overestimate and overload ourself...Nowadays I do not want to be any kind of specialist and do not want to get so much money like before just want to be a happy man and I can tell you proudly already I am ! Poorer but happier and I swear it was a very good business... :y And added yet a hun poem's words : "Under you is hell, above you is heaven, inside you is THE LADDER" Never give up Rob, find the ladder and climb up, nobody can do it without you!
Your understanding of the English is getting better and better, keep it up and you will be like cem from Turkey.... :y :y :y
Thank you, I'll do my best ! :y Although I would like to keep my right up to make some mistake sometimes to test whether if you correct me or not ;D ;D ;D But back to Robert I hope he read my comment before quitted... :-\
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Dear all,
Thankyou so much for your comments - I really appreciate them.
As you can tell from the time I haven't been able to get much any sleep tonight, so am going to make myself a cuppa and write it all down. Hopefully can get an appointment with the Doctor tomorrow at some point and give him a concise written summary.
Thanks - Rob
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Good luck with the docs Rob.
Stress and depression can be very serious and depression can often go unnoticed by the person affected.
I know in my last year on the Army I was posted a long way from home but within the UK. I hated being there and already had problems with the 'green machine' prior to that posting and had a lot to deal with at that unit. I knew I hated being there etc but didn't really see the effect it was having on my family, it wasn't until after I signed off and got out (at the 18 year point so by no means an easy decision) that I found out more details. Sat round the xmas table, first xmas after getting, chatting away with my mum, dad, wife and kids and it was there that it came out that it had got to the stage where my own kids were scared of me coming home at the weekends because I would explode with anger at the slightest little thing! It was at that point that it really hit home how bad it had got.
All I would suggest is pretty much what you appear to be doing, see the doc / HR at work and get it acknowledged dealt with. As has been said, your employer has a duty of care for your health and well being.
You are talking about it and doing the right things it seems, I sat on it and did nothing and I think the outcome would of been far worse for me if I hadn't come out of the Army when I did.
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Good luck Rob,
When you see the quack you will have to answer a questionnaire... Be honest with the answers as this is to "Grade" the severity of your depression. If in doubt, err on the side of caution and give a slightly higher value than you first think (this will make sense when you answer the questions ;)) and don't feel embarrassed/ashamed... There is no need to and you are doing the right thing getting help :y
Above all, talk to your family about it and take the advice of the GP/HR bods.
Also, as an addition, any meds you are prescribed will probably tell you to avoid alcohol. I would strongly recommend this as alcohol is a depressant and avoiding it will help :y (I don't know how relevant that comment is... You may be T Total for all I know ;))
Overall, don't bottle it up and don't be afraid to talk... You've done the hardest bit now by seeking the help you need! It gets easier from now on :y
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Thanks all.
Document written, a concise 2/3 page, well spaced.
SWMBO read it before going to work and started to cry - setting me off.
I called the Docs appt line, they have a Doc providing telephone triage - an excellent idea. She asked me to read what I had written & within a few lines I was blubbing like a baby.
Appointment is made for later today so will report back.
It sounds like a cliche, but I do feel as if I have taken that 1st step.
Thanks guys ....
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Good luck mate :y
Don't bottle it up! as BT once said "It's good to talk" and never a truer statement has been made.
Above all be honest to the ones around you, because they will be there to support you.
Hope it all goes well, but this is just the first step of a long bumpy road.
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very much agree with dad1 here! Youve taken he first few steps as you say and acknowledged the problem (a hard enough thing in itself for us blokes ;D) and have set the ball rolling . From personal experience a very key issue is not to bottle things up/try and repress or ignore your feelings and to open up to people and talk about stuff including options. A problem shared etc. There are some people who simply dont get it but hey, thats more of an indication of their own problems not yours. Mostly you'll be warmed and a little surprised by the empathy and support you might get. As a member on several forums for my son's condition it is around thsese things that the members benefit most. good luck :y
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Thanks again for the kind words.
I saw the Doc and had a very constructive discussion with him - which actually made me cry and then feel better straight afterwards.
Diagnosis was as expected as was course of treatment - basically medication, counseling (in a few weeks) and engaging in positive activities over the next couple of weeks.
So, prescription collected, next appointment made and certificate posted to the boss.
Hopefully I can chill out a bit now - today's activity will be to turn some pallets into kindling for the logburner.
Thanks again :y
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Nothing wrong with having a blub and getting a few things off your chest Rob if you feel better afterwards :)
Glad things are moving on for the better :y
That offer stands anytime
All the best :y
Just think, if you do get some time off, you can help your lad drink Lincoln dry over the holidays :y ;D ;D
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Chill, and get well soon Rob your health is important. :y
P.S didn't you recently start the job?
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Nothing wrong with having a blub and getting a few things off your chest Rob if you feel better afterwards :)
Glad things are moving on for the better :y
That offer stands anytime
All the best :y
Just think, if you do get some time off, you can help your lad drink Lincoln dry over the holidays :y ;D ;D
Not allowed to drink :'(. Thanks for the offer though Steve.
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Chill, and get well soon Rob your health is important. :y
P.S didn't you recently start the job?
Thanks Dave, 2 years but feels like 10 :-\