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Mr Skrunts

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Lists - Things To Do.
« on: 27 November 2008, 21:53:55 »

Some fun things to do the next time you're on one of those long international flights to kill time...

Pinch the stewardess' butt as she passes.

When two people kiss in the in flight movie, belch real loud.

When there's any nudity, hoot really loudly for a few minutes.

Fart loudly and act shocked, looking around to see who did it.

Fiddle around with the emergency exit, then ask a fellow passenger if he has a crowbar.

Hijack the cockpit and, over the loudspeaker, announce that the first class passengers and luggage are to switch places.

Run down the aisle screaming, "He's got a bomb! He's got a bomb!".

Go into the bathroom and make rude bodily noises, then come out looking refreshed.

"Accidental" soda spill on the dork next to you.

Give someone a coin, saying "Heads, I detonate the bomb. Tails, I don't".

Go into the bathroom, drop your pants, then come out, yelling "We're out of toilet paper! Stewardess!".

Describe your sex life in great detail to the five-year-old next to you.

Lead a bible study session in the back of the plane.

Start a hot dog stand.

Steal businessman's laptop, play solitaire on it.

Remark that perhaps you shouldn't have put super glue in your underpants that morning.

Pick your nose and pat the person next to you.

Show off your Batman underwear.

Switch accents and see if anyone notices.

Sneak into the cockpit and hit the warning alarm.

Scratch your butt, then sniff your finger.

Go into the cockpit, flick on the intercom light, then loudly inquire as to why the fuel dial says "e".

Go into the cockpit, ask the pilot in an obnoxious voice "Why do they call it the COCKpit?" then snort as if it's the funniest thing in the world.

Don't use deodorant, then "accidentally" stick your armpit in someone's face.

Sneeze, using somebody's sleeve instead of your hand to cover it.

Snort when you laugh.

Tell corny jokes and laugh like it's absolutely hilarious, then expect others to do the same.

Ride carry-on luggage down the aisle, yelling "Yeee-ha!".

With a desperate look, ask the stewardess where the bathroom is, then look relieved and say "Never mind. Do you have any towels?".

Jump up and scream "AAAHHH!! I left the stove on!!".

Ask someone for their autograph, pretending that you think they're Kevin Costner or Goldie Hawn (This best then the person looks nothing like the movie star in question)

If someone has a bad toupee, whack it off.

Pretend you're flying the plane.

Get some rub-on tattoos and a leather jacket, pretend that you belong to a biker gang.

Take over the plane with a toy gun.

Yell to someone "Is it time to hijack the plane yet?" (Note: Do this when there are stewardess nearby).

To the person next to you, say "It's amazing that they didn't notice the grenade in my luggage.
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Mr Skrunts

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Re: Lists - Things To Do.
« Reply #1 on: 27 November 2008, 21:55:07 »

Things to do in the bathroom stall...

1. Stick your palm open under the stall wall and ask your neighbor, "May I borrow a highlighter?"

2. Say "Uh oh, I knew I shouldn't put my lips on that."

3. Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.

4. Say, "Hmmm, I've never seen that color before."

5. Drop a marble and say, "oh shoot!! My glass eye!!"

6. Say "Darn, this water is cold."

7. Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a high place six to eight feet. Sigh relaxingly.

8. Say, "Now how did that get there?"

9. Say, "Humus. Reminds me of humus."

10. Fill up a large flask with Mountain Dew. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbors while yelling, "Whoa! Easy boy!!"

11. Say, "Interesting....more sinkers than floaters.

12. Using a small squeeze tube, spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet paper and drop it under the stall wall of your neighbor. Then say, "Whoops, could you kick that back over here, please?"

13. Say. "C'mon Mr. Happy! Don't fall asleep on me!!"

14. Say, "Boy, that sure looks like a maggot"

15. Say, "Darn, I Knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I gonna do?"

16. Play a well known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.

17. Before you unroll toilet paper, conspicuously lay down your "Cross-Dressers Anonymous" newsletter on the floor visible to the adjacent stall.

18. Lower a small mirror underneath the stall wall and adjust it so you can see your neighbor and say, "Peek-a-boo!"

19. Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall wall and sing "Born Free"

20. When you're in a bathroom stall take a Snickers candy bar with you and when someone is next to you, squish it in your hand and reach under the stall wall and say "You got any more toilet paper over there, This side's completely out."
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Mr Skrunts

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Re: Lists - Things To Do.
« Reply #2 on: 27 November 2008, 21:56:34 »

Boring Partys

Speak in a strange foreign accent. when someone asks where you are from, name a country only you can pronounce.

Use a different accent every time you talk to someone new.

When getting food, pile everything onto your plate in heaping servings - make sure to use your hands!

Ask the host, "Who threw this cheesy party, anyway?"

Turn cartwheels across the floor. If you can turn a back flip, all the better!

Bring a novel and curl up in a corner with it.

Cough all over guests, then exclaim, "Doctor says a few more years and I'll be cured..."

Hang your head and whisper one-word answers to questions.

Play a lullaby on a kazoo during a speech (singing a lullaby works okay, too)

If there is music, mix up your dancing: break dance to classical, symphony conductor hand waves to techno music.

If you find your former dancing partner dancing with someone else, burst into tears, wailing "I thought you loved me!", and run from the room.

Tell a middle-aged wife, "Your husband seems very happy with that girl in the closet..."

Tell a middle aged man, "Your wife seems very happy with that boy in the closet..."

Whisper to the guest on your right, "What kind of lame moron actually goes to these parties, anyway?"

Bring Lego warships and fighter jets. Wage a war in the middle of the room. Urge other guests to get involved. If you are a historical expert, reenact the revolutionary war, the civil war, world war two, etc.

Bring a soccer ball, basketball, football, or baseball. Start a game... in the kitchen.

Karate chop everywhere and everything. Yell really, really loud. A few sudden kicks would be worthwhile as well.

Wear wool or feathers and sneeze all night. "The doctor says I'm not allergic to anything except sheep and birds..."

If someone says the word no to you, say, "How dare you turn down the prince / princess of Ugranialo!"

Burst into the room an hour late, sopping wet and screaming, "I've done it! I've found Atlantis!"

Pick out the oldest women at the party, run up to her, and exclaim, "Grandmother! it's me, Anastasia!"

If it is a summer party in the evening, break into a duet with another guest: "Summer nights". Persuade the host to sing "You're the one that I want" with you.

Come in saying, the guy outside in the lab coat is looking for (insert name of host).
« Last Edit: 27 November 2008, 21:57:02 by skruntie »
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Vamps

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Re: Lists - Things To Do.
« Reply #3 on: 27 November 2008, 21:59:19 »

Think you would get yourself nicked if you tried many of those things :-X
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JamesV6CDX

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Re: Lists - Things To Do.
« Reply #4 on: 27 November 2008, 22:00:56 »

Quote
Think you would get yourself nicked if you tried many of those things :-X

Or shot  ::)

"Hijack the plane with a toy gun"  ::)
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Ken T

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Re: Lists - Things To Do.
« Reply #5 on: 27 November 2008, 22:56:43 »

Quote
Some fun things to do the next time you're on one of those long international flights to kill time...

Pinch the stewardess' butt as she passes.

When two people kiss in the in flight movie, belch real loud.

When there's any nudity, hoot really loudly for a few minutes.

Fart loudly and act shocked, looking around to see who did it.

Fiddle around with the emergency exit, then ask a fellow passenger if he has a crowbar.

Hijack the cockpit and, over the loudspeaker, announce that the first class passengers and luggage are to switch places.

Run down the aisle screaming, "He's got a bomb! He's got a bomb!".

Go into the bathroom and make rude bodily noises, then come out looking refreshed.

"Accidental" soda spill on the dork next to you.

Give someone a coin, saying "Heads, I detonate the bomb. Tails, I don't".

Go into the bathroom, drop your pants, then come out, yelling "We're out of toilet paper! Stewardess!".

Describe your sex life in great detail to the five-year-old next to you.

Lead a bible study session in the back of the plane.

Start a hot dog stand.

Steal businessman's laptop, play solitaire on it.

Remark that perhaps you shouldn't have put super glue in your underpants that morning.

Pick your nose and pat the person next to you.

Show off your Batman underwear.

Switch accents and see if anyone notices.

Sneak into the cockpit and hit the warning alarm.

Scratch your butt, then sniff your finger.

Go into the cockpit, flick on the intercom light, then loudly inquire as to why the fuel dial says "e".

Go into the cockpit, ask the pilot in an obnoxious voice "Why do they call it the COCKpit?" then snort as if it's the funniest thing in the world.

Don't use deodorant, then "accidentally" stick your armpit in someone's face.

Sneeze, using somebody's sleeve instead of your hand to cover it.

Snort when you laugh.

Tell corny jokes and laugh like it's absolutely hilarious, then expect others to do the same.

Ride carry-on luggage down the aisle, yelling "Yeee-ha!".

With a desperate look, ask the stewardess where the bathroom is, then look relieved and say "Never mind. Do you have any towels?".

Jump up and scream "AAAHHH!! I left the stove on!!".

Ask someone for their autograph, pretending that you think they're Kevin Costner or Goldie Hawn (This best then the person looks nothing like the movie star in question)

If someone has a bad toupee, whack it off.

Pretend you're flying the plane.

Get some rub-on tattoos and a leather jacket, pretend that you belong to a biker gang.

Take over the plane with a toy gun.

Yell to someone "Is it time to hijack the plane yet?" (Note: Do this when there are stewardess nearby).

To the person next to you, say "It's amazing that they didn't notice the grenade in my luggage.


You ******* I'm flying home tomorrow  :-X

Well if anyone starts doing of these, least I know he/she droves a miggy.  :y

Ken
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Vamps

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Re: Lists - Things To Do.
« Reply #6 on: 27 November 2008, 23:04:15 »

Quote
Quote
Some fun things to do the next time you're on one of those long international flights to kill time...

Pinch the stewardess' butt as she passes.

When two people kiss in the in flight movie, belch real loud.

When there's any nudity, hoot really loudly for a few minutes.

Fart loudly and act shocked, looking around to see who did it.

Fiddle around with the emergency exit, then ask a fellow passenger if he has a crowbar.

Hijack the cockpit and, over the loudspeaker, announce that the first class passengers and luggage are to switch places.

Run down the aisle screaming, "He's got a bomb! He's got a bomb!".

Go into the bathroom and make rude bodily noises, then come out looking refreshed.

"Accidental" soda spill on the dork next to you.

Give someone a coin, saying "Heads, I detonate the bomb. Tails, I don't".

Go into the bathroom, drop your pants, then come out, yelling "We're out of toilet paper! Stewardess!".

Describe your sex life in great detail to the five-year-old next to you.

Lead a bible study session in the back of the plane.

Start a hot dog stand.

Steal businessman's laptop, play solitaire on it.

Remark that perhaps you shouldn't have put super glue in your underpants that morning.

Pick your nose and pat the person next to you.

Show off your Batman underwear.

Switch accents and see if anyone notices.

Sneak into the cockpit and hit the warning alarm.

Scratch your butt, then sniff your finger.

Go into the cockpit, flick on the intercom light, then loudly inquire as to why the fuel dial says "e".

Go into the cockpit, ask the pilot in an obnoxious voice "Why do they call it the COCKpit?" then snort as if it's the funniest thing in the world.

Don't use deodorant, then "accidentally" stick your armpit in someone's face.

Sneeze, using somebody's sleeve instead of your hand to cover it.

Snort when you laugh.

Tell corny jokes and laugh like it's absolutely hilarious, then expect others to do the same.

Ride carry-on luggage down the aisle, yelling "Yeee-ha!".

With a desperate look, ask the stewardess where the bathroom is, then look relieved and say "Never mind. Do you have any towels?".

Jump up and scream "AAAHHH!! I left the stove on!!".

Ask someone for their autograph, pretending that you think they're Kevin Costner or Goldie Hawn (This best then the person looks nothing like the movie star in question)

If someone has a bad toupee, whack it off.

Pretend you're flying the plane.

Get some rub-on tattoos and a leather jacket, pretend that you belong to a biker gang.

Take over the plane with a toy gun.

Yell to someone "Is it time to hijack the plane yet?" (Note: Do this when there are stewardess nearby).

To the person next to you, say "It's amazing that they didn't notice the grenade in my luggage.


You ******* I'm flying home tomorrow  :-X

Well if anyone starts doing of these, least I know he/she droves a miggy.  :y

Ken

 ;D ;D ;D ;D
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cem_devecioglu

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Re: Lists - Things To Do.
« Reply #7 on: 28 November 2008, 10:20:09 »

 ;D ;D

the next step is jail ;D
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Gaffers

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Re: Lists - Things To Do.
« Reply #8 on: 28 November 2008, 11:22:50 »

9 of the first ones (airplane) will get you arrested, 1 of them will get you killed. Have a guess which one...........
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Re: Lists - Things To Do.
« Reply #9 on: 28 November 2008, 11:37:35 »

Courtroom Fun

The big list of fun stuff to do in that boring ol' courtroom of law...

1. Bring a cell phone and order a pizza when the judge starts talking.

2. Bring a zip-lock bag full of grapes and launch a few at the defendant when the judge isn't looking.

3. Giggle uncontrollably when they show the evidence, if any blood is present.

4. If they ever bring up the possibility of an accomplice, duck your head and quiver.

5. Stand up and yell "OBJECTION!" to everything the judge says. EVERYTHING.

6. If you're the defendant, wait until the judge starts talking about you. Proceed to hide under your table.

7. If anybody attempts to communicate with you in any way, stare off into space and blow spit bubbles.

8. Sing "The Song That Never Ends" incessantly.

9. Get the judge to look at you. Lick your lips and motion that you'll "call him"

10. Actually call him

11. Bring a kazoo.

12. Act like you're doing something important, and ask them to "keep it down"

13. Every time the judge uses the gavel, keel over backwards and act like you've been shot.

14. Bring a Gameboy and leave the volume at full.

15. Wait until everybody is completely focused on the trial, then blow a referee's whistle as loud as you can. Point to the person next to you and tell him to "stop it!"

16. Pretend you turn into a pig when you get wet. Douse yourself in cold water and act like one.

17. Call the judge a wuss when he issues the death penalty. When he accuses you of contempt of the court, look puzzled and ask him what it means. When he answers, object.

18. Dress up like Santa Claus

19. Drink all of your lawyer's water, then ask for more. Then ask to go to the bathroom.

20. Hiccup every time somebody says the word "the"

21. Change your plea every five minutes

22. If you're the judge, call the defendant the plaintiff, the plaintiff a lawyer, the witness a juror, and the jurors defendants. Call the lawyers "Barney"

23. Gurgle into the microphone.

24. Complain aloud about that nasty wedgie you have, then take a poll of others in the audience if they too have a nasty wedgie.

25. If in traffic court, when asked to stand, walk over to the judge and issue him a parking ticket on his desk.

26. When asked to produce evidence, pick your nose, smear the snot on the table, point to it and say, "From this it is obvious, I am not guilty!"

27. Wear those X-Ray vision glasses from Halloween, when someone walks past, stare them up and down then shake head in dismay.

28. Popcorn and a large coke, if anyone asks about it, show them your ticket and say "I'm a paying customer!".

29. Fart, pause momentarily, and comment under your breath, "I've done better..."

30. Fart again later on, take a deep breath and state enthusiastically "Now that's more like it!".

31. Bring a Lego replica of the courtroom, including Lego people, and imitate everything happening, including voices!

32. When pronounced guilty, reply "How about we try that again, this time Rock, Scissors, Paper - best of three!"

33. Bring toaster and wave a box of "Tropical Sprinkles Pop Tarts" around while asking "Where's a damn plug around here!".
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Mr Skrunts

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Re: Lists - Things To Do.
« Reply #10 on: 28 November 2008, 11:39:19 »

Dorm Shower Fun

There are ways to make just about any situation fun, even going to your dorm shower...


1. Enter the stall. Shower for about 3 minutes, then scream really loudly, exclaiming, "I didn't know I had one of THOSE!"

2. Enter the stall, fully clothed. Do not undress and make sure your clothes get all wet and soapy. Complain when leaving the bathroom that your shirt tends to bleed.

3. Ask Scottie to beam you up.

4. Enter the stall, undress and then re-dress up as Superman. Leap out of the stall, vengefully vow to stop Lex Luther's evil plot, then run full force into the wall. Stand up, shake your head, and proceed to take your shower.

5. Bring a bottle of fake blood or ketchup into the shower with you. Exclaim "Ow! You know, it really hurts when you pop one of those." Then let the blood/ketchup seep down the drain for all to see.

6. Bring in a rubber chicken. Get it all soapy, then toss in into the next stall. Demand that the person in that stall return it to you, or you will cast a voodoo curse on them. The next day, hang the chicken from the bathroom lighting fixtures by a noose and stick numerous pins and forks in it.

7. Have a seizure. Bang against the walls of the stall really hard. Try to knock them down. If anyone later asks if you are okay, just say that you had some Mexican Jumping Fava Beans and they were reacting negatively with your stomach.

8. Stand in the bathroom, waiting for would-be shower-goers. When they come in, tell them "not to do it" and ask them "not to give in to sin." Wail mournfully when they step into the shower.

9. Initiate a war with the person in the stall next to you. Use the residual water on the floor as your battle medium, and float little battleships over to their side. If they kick them back or throw them over the edge, exclaim that you didn't know they had the power of God and sheepishly mumble prayers for the duration of your shower.

10. Bring in a fake finger. Float it down the drainage "ditch." Ask if someone would be so kind as to return it to you. If no one does, tell them that the finger has been sacrificed to Satan and that the shower stalls are now possessed. Hang Halloween decorations and crepe-paper ghosts from them the next day.

11. Bang your head against the stall wall, shouting "Redrum! Redrum!" in your best groggy voice.

12. Bring a Yoo-Hoo chocolate milk drink to the shower with you. Complain about a stomach ache, then moan "Ohhhh, um, uh-oh," and squirt the Yoo-Hoo down the drain "ditch" for all to see.

13. Before you turn the shower on, make a noise like you are charging up a proton pack from Ghostbusters. Before you turn it off, ask Egon to set the trap up for you.

14. Bring a balloon into the shower. Make the balloon squeak for the duration of your bathing experience. Then pop it, and fall to the ground as if shot.

15. Bring dead fish into the shower with you. Let them float down the drainage "ditch", complaining angrily about the quality of water these days.

16. Hang up the names of different farm animals in the stalls. Have everyone entering the stalls join you in a rendition of "Old McDonald Had A Farm," making the sound of the animal in their stall.

17. Turn the stall into a shrine for a pagan god. Call him Weeshy. Insist that anyone who uses that stall must tithe to receive his benevolence and glory. If they don't tithe, avoid them for the rest of your life.

18. Take your shower like normal, and then begin screaming that the Communists are taking over. Make battle sounds -- including bombs, bazookas, and tanks. Towards the end, wearily declare victory. Leave wounded.

19. Blow bubbles. Exclaim that you are dissolving.

20. Bring in a bucket, fill it with water, and float a bar of soap in it. Charge a fee for people to see the Wicked Witch of the West bathing nude. Threaten anyone who laughs at you with flying monkeys.

21. Start singing Pavarotti really loud. In the middle, stop, stutter for a second, and then exclaim "Ohmigosh...do you know what these words REALLY mean?"

22. Suck on the faucet head until you fill up with water. Complain that the Seven Chinese Brothers get no respect, OR pretend to be a fountain.

23. Wet your head, and then sneak into a toilet stall. Flush the bowl and wait a minute. Walk out of the stall lurching, complaining about how dizzy you are.

24. Buy a bunch of those tiny animal-pills that expand into full, spongy shapes when they get wet. Bring them into the shower and spill them into the ditch. Ask somebody for your pills back, and when they hand you little animals, scream, slap them, and run away.

25. Make your best Psycho noise (reeEENT reeEENT...).

26. Try to get everyone in the other stalls to sing in four-part harmony with you. If this actually works, change your voice part every three measures.

27. Become a shower-pirate. Loot other stalls of soap, Oxy pads, and Q-Tips. Bury them under the tile floor. Fire cannons at people using toilet balls.

28. Bring scuba gear into the shower with you. Talk to Cousteau. Upon leaving, tell everyone that the Titanic was actually torpedoed by the Germans. Be cocky.

29. Hum for a couple of moments, stop, make an "Mmmm!" sound, and then announce to everyone that the mildew on the shower walls kind of tastes like head cheese.

30. Coat the floor in a fine layer of quick-drying cement.

31. Hang "Marisa Cevasco steals Homecoming Queen Crown" signs in all the stalls. If anyone asks who Marisa Cevasco is, call them ignorant and ignore them for the rest of your life.

32. Bring in Sesame Street bath books. Read them aloud. Giggle every time Bert walks in on Ernie bathing.

33. Stare at people's feet as they bathe. If they do not wash their feet, tell them to. If this happens a second time, steal their shoes and tell them that they left on strike. If they DO wash their feet and fall down while doing it, laugh hysterically.

34. Stand outside the shower curtain, raise a harpoon, and shout "I'm coming for you, Moby!" Run in an
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cem_devecioglu

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Re: Lists - Things To Do.
« Reply #11 on: 28 November 2008, 11:53:14 »

Skruntie, the most good point for your posts is that they are ideal for

someone to learn English..Easy to see all the usage of verbs, nouns in

the sentence as an example :y
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cem_devecioglu

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Re: Lists - Things To Do.
« Reply #12 on: 28 November 2008, 11:57:05 »

and there's a folder on my desktop named Skruntie  ;D :y
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Mr Skrunts

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Re: Lists - Things To Do.
« Reply #13 on: 28 November 2008, 11:58:21 »

Quote
and there's a folder on my desktop named Skruntie  ;D :y


and do I need to ask whats stored in that folder.  ::) :P
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cem_devecioglu

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Re: Lists - Things To Do.
« Reply #14 on: 28 November 2008, 11:59:11 »

Quote
Quote
and there's a folder on my desktop named Skruntie  ;D :y


and do I need to ask whats stored in that folder.  ::) :P

dont ;D :y
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