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[alunonhisown]

Some funny, some stupid, you decide.

I just renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his bum!

I was walking down the road the other day when I saw paddy struggling to carry a wardrobe down the street and so I asked him "Is Mick not here to help your out"
Paddy replied "He is helping me, He is inside carrying the clothes"

I was driving to work today and saw a woman driving down the road with her hazard lights on.
At least she's honest.

What do you call a camel with four humps?
A Saudi quattro

My mate say he can get his dog to come on command.
I have to give mine a handjob.

I love my wife, she always gives me 100% sound advice.
99% sound, 1% advice.

I went to the ATM this morning and it said "insufficient funds".
I'm wondering, is it them or me?

I see the price of Oxo cubes and Bovril has shot up again.
The fekking stock market's gone crazy.

What is the capital of Iceland?
About £2.50 at the moment, and falling.

Due to the credit crunch, the light at the end of the tunnel will be turned off.

With the world's banking system on its knees, Iceland's economy is on the brink of bankruptcy.
Mind you they should have known not to trust a fekking scouser. That Kerry Katona has had her thieving fingers in the till or I'm a monkey's uncle.

Statistics show that, as the credit crunch has risen, more women have been having sex with their husbands to save money on batteries.

No wonder there's a credit crunch - have you seen that new Barclays advert? That fekking slide must have cost millions to build!   
I laughed at them all, but I am a dumb brunette, with blonde streaks.

[maria]

Very good

[STMO999]

Some funny, some stupid, you decide.

I just renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his bum!

I was walking down the road the other day when I saw paddy struggling to carry a wardrobe down the street and so I asked him "Is Mick not here to help your out"
Paddy replied "He is helping me, He is inside carrying the clothes"

I was driving to work today and saw a woman driving down the road with her hazard lights on.
At least she's honest.

What do you call a camel with four humps?
A Saudi quattro

My mate say he can get his dog to come on command.
I have to give mine a handjob.

I love my wife, she always gives me 100% sound advice.
99% sound, 1% advice.

I went to the ATM this morning and it said "insufficient funds".
I'm wondering, is it them or me?

I see the price of Oxo cubes and Bovril has shot up again.
The fekking stock market's gone crazy.

What is the capital of Iceland?
About £2.50 at the moment, and falling.

Due to the credit crunch, the light at the end of the tunnel will be turned off.

With the world's banking system on its knees, Iceland's economy is on the brink of bankruptcy.
Mind you they should have known not to trust a fekking scouser. That Kerry Katona has had her thieving fingers in the till or I'm a monkey's uncle.

Statistics show that, as the credit crunch has risen, more women have been having sex with their husbands to save money on batteries.

No wonder there's a credit crunch - have you seen that new Barclays advert? That fekking slide must have cost millions to build!   
I laughed at them all, but I am a dumb brunette, with blonde streaks.

That one reminded me of this one:

Following the problems in the sub-prime lending market in America and the run on Northern Rock BS in the UK, uncertainty has now hit Japan.
 
In the last 7 days Origami Bank has folded, Sumo Bank has gone belly up and Bonsai Bank announced plans to cut some of its branches.
 
Yesterday, it was announced that Karaoke Bank is up for sale and will likely go for a song while today shares in Kamikaze Bank were suspended after they nose-dived.
 
Furthermore, 500 staff at Karate Bank got the chop and analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi Bank where it is feared that staff may get a raw deal.
 

[alunonhisown]

Some funny, some stupid, you decide.

I just renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his bum!

I was walking down the road the other day when I saw paddy struggling to carry a wardrobe down the street and so I asked him "Is Mick not here to help your out"
Paddy replied "He is helping me, He is inside carrying the clothes"

I was driving to work today and saw a woman driving down the road with her hazard lights on.
At least she's honest.

What do you call a camel with four humps?
A Saudi quattro

My mate say he can get his dog to come on command.
I have to give mine a handjob.

I love my wife, she always gives me 100% sound advice.
99% sound, 1% advice.

I went to the ATM this morning and it said "insufficient funds".
I'm wondering, is it them or me?

I see the price of Oxo cubes and Bovril has shot up again.
The fekking stock market's gone crazy.

What is the capital of Iceland?
About £2.50 at the moment, and falling.

Due to the credit crunch, the light at the end of the tunnel will be turned off.

With the world's banking system on its knees, Iceland's economy is on the brink of bankruptcy.
Mind you they should have known not to trust a fekking scouser. That Kerry Katona has had her thieving fingers in the till or I'm a monkey's uncle.

Statistics show that, as the credit crunch has risen, more women have been having sex with their husbands to save money on batteries.

No wonder there's a credit crunch - have you seen that new Barclays advert? That fekking slide must have cost millions to build!   
I laughed at them all, but I am a dumb brunette, with blonde streaks.

That one reminded me of this one:

Following the problems in the sub-prime lending market in America and the run on Northern Rock BS in the UK, uncertainty has now hit Japan.
 
In the last 7 days Origami Bank has folded, Sumo Bank has gone belly up and Bonsai Bank announced plans to cut some of its branches.
 
Yesterday, it was announced that Karaoke Bank is up for sale and will likely go for a song while today shares in Kamikaze Bank were suspended after they nose-dived.
 
Furthermore, 500 staff at Karate Bank got the chop and analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi Bank where it is feared that staff may get a raw deal.
 

They were BRILLIANT, MOST, STOM, TOMS, Whatever, just BRILLIANT