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[Mr Skrunts]

The thing is it's not just her she's ruined, it's everyone else around her, it's the most selfish thing I could ever think to do, I think I have to leave I've got my own place anyway so moving out is no issue, but I just can't trust her. That's the thing I just can't trust her.

Dont move out of property if it is your own.  She is in the wrong, ask her to leave. 

[Debs.]

I`m with Ploppy and Proz on this.....life`s too short!

It must be an awful position for your son at his (still youthful) age....being 'pulled' two ways; feeling protective of you and his Mum: even though she`s so-selfishly let you both down.

[Proz]

The thing is it's not just her she's ruined, it's everyone else around her, it's the most selfish thing I could ever think to do, I think I have to leave I've got my own place anyway so moving out is no issue, but I just can't trust her. That's the thing I just can't trust her.

Thats what killed it for me , the trust ..... i would never be able to trust her again 

[cem_devecioglu]

The thing is it's not just her she's ruined, it's everyone else around her, it's the most selfish thing I could ever think to do, I think I have to leave I've got my own place anyway so moving out is no issue, but I just can't trust her. That's the thing I just can't trust her.

Dont move out of property if it is your own.  She is in the wrong, ask her to leave. 

In these kind of circumstances , its best to leave the places where you have bad memories.. a fresh start will always be better imho.. and I'm afraid "trust" word is not meaningful anymore.. :-/

[Del Boy]

Just been down to her work, spoke to the woman who's bloke it is they've kissed nothing else but I've also been told she's texting others as well, that's it done.

[Sixstring]

Have been reading all this, and, having been in the same position as you twice before now, must offer you some advice that I didn't want to take at the time, but worked for me, and made me feel better in time.

A person (male or female) who feels the need for anothers company when they are aready in a relationship MUST feel there is something missing in that relationship for them, or they would not seek out the company of another.

Regardless of who started what, it takes TWO to tango, two to make, and two to break a relationship, and in your case, the man has a relationship too, so he KNEW what was going on, and was prepared to cheat on HIS partner/wife, therefore he wanted to make a relationship with your lady knowing she had a partner. He didn't care, and neither did she about hurting their respective relationships.

This means you are better off out of it, because she had done it before.

As for "wev'e only kissed...." it is so unlikely its not worth considering, because a man or woman doing this KNOWINGLY is doing it for kicks they can't/don't get at home, and the thrill of getting caught is the motivation.

Leave, friend, go back to your home, and heal. find someone deserving of your attention, this lady plainly is not.
Take comfort in the fact others care about you and how you feel, and are willing to offer you the advice and shoulder to cry on, albeit metaphorically, and stop your son doing something that will affect him in later life, and only come back to haunt him possibly. Violence does not make anything right, and the other man will be looking over his shoulder for a time expecting a beating.
Rise above it, walk away with head held high, for you did not do anything disrespectful, and others will respect you for it.

Best Wishes,

Mike.

[Peachy]

I look at it like this....
If you take her back there will ALWAYS be THREE in the bed, ALWAYS.
Move on. And do it Amicably.
Smashing some blokes face in is NOT the way to go, no matter how bitter you feel. God it hurts, I know it does.
Never look back in anger, and remember there will always be three in the bed. NOT GOOD.

[mr ICE man]

had it happen to me too!!very recently!agree with sixstring tbh.marriage/relationships have to be based on trust and you cant trust her having done what she has more than once.although its hard to do your best off without her mate.

[Del Boy]

According to her I frighten her, I've known for sometime about this but had no evidence, I kept dropping hints and Friday afternoon I flipped, I never did anything to her but I was punching things and yes, I was saying I know, I know who it is etc etc, she's going I can't live like this anymore. Then after Saturday and seeing the state my son was in I don't know what is wrong in her sick disgusting filthy head. But get this, today driving near where the bloke lives, I see her coming out of his road, she tells me "oh I've just called it off tell Liam he's won" Liam being my son, she thought I be getting ready for work so she knew where I would be, every Tuesday my son is out of the house until 6, she must think I'm stupid. I know what'll happen, it'll be yeah I'll shag him then after a while I'll go back to Del because he's had me back before. She does this and she had the bare faced cheek to say to me earlier I'm stuffed without a car, and I haven't got any money, and like a stupid prick I said take my credit card which she refused but I mean how dare she.

Earlier after I'd seen her coming out from there I sat by his road just thinking if I do this is happens properly and it happens now, but for what I feel better, but I get locked up lose my job and everything else. This won't go away for him though it'll happen but, I need him to think he's home and dry with her first purely for the fact that he won't be ready for me to pounce. I mean I haven't even kicked off yet, not properly anyway, but all she keeps saying to me is I don't want you I don't want you, my son said to me earlier, how she can say that to you is unreal.

[maria]

Del my addvice is to not hit the bloke as it takes two and i know it hurts but i would just leave mate and try and get on with your life if you want you can pm me and i can help you as i have been through the same thing  so ni know how you feel, and yes you are so soft to forgive her in the past but that what loves does to you, you will be fine when you start your divorce and get rid , and then you and your son can be happy again and maybe in the future the right person will come and treat you right.

[Del Boy]

Well people caught that filthy excuse I was upset over last night. Sat and hid up in a bush opposite my house or what was my house then wallop at exactly 01:04 I saw him coming out of MY house with her kissing him!!! My 16 year old last week said to her, you choose mum me or him, she then text me and said tell Liam he's one, then all week she has been going on at him about loyalty because he's been more loyal to me. Where in the name of all that is holy is her loyalty to him? He's going to say later, get up to anythng last night he'll already know if she's lieing or not. Well I'm disgusted with her, as he said last week give her the benefit of the doubt she admitted it fair & square, now though fu*k her. My son said he's out of there and he doesn't want anymore to do with her. I don't want her to know I was watching but she'll know if he says anything and he's not like me if something pisses him off he'll say.

[Del Boy]

Things now happen my way with him too, thinks he can get away with this does he?

[webby23]

Take it easy mate, theres alot of sound advice in the responses above, please heed them.

I have been thorugh similar once before, not nice, but time DOES heal and the further you can get away from her the better, no more chances for her mate, dont waste your  life trying with someone like that.......

Best wishes and dont let them drag you down......