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[humbucker]

gardening? Isn't that a pink job?

no, turns out it's black and blue 

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

So much for the 'English Country Garden'. As idyllic as it appears, it's a f&cking warzone out there! Spent a lot of Saturday weeding it, ended up completely covered in stinging nettle rashes and stings. Both arms and both legs red raw. Nice. Hayfever was playing up a bit so reached for inhaler. Shoved it in my cakehole and fired it off, inhaled deeply and immediately started choking as I'd sucked a full size earwig into the back of my throat. Little bugger must have crawled into the inhaler from the top as the lid was on. Choking continued for what seemed like an absolute age until it flew out of my trap like a missile. I'd just about recoved from that horror when I was wandering around the garden taking photos and trying to note down the different species of flower and plant we've got growing about the place. Was taking a snap of one of the rose bushes when a wasp came and stung me on the side of the HEAD. If it had been the arm it would have been bad enough, but the side of the head?! Agony ensued, followed by a complete numbness of the cheek, ear, jaw and head. It's still stinging a bit now. Little bugger.

So the moral of the story is this: pour concrete and petrol over anything that even looks like it's going to grow leaves or flowers. Or simply don't go out. Ever.

No match for our weeds.....

[henryd]

I'd say purple.....theres bits that are blue and bits that are pink 

Indeed. I do two types of gardening job. Four stroke and Two stroke.

Mrs. KW spends a few minutes in the garden, sees a spider and runs back inside.

Mrs HD has the same problem with multiple legs on insects