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Author Topic: He said to me.  (Read 643 times)

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Mr Skrunts

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He said to me.
« on: 01 July 2010, 13:26:09 »

[size=12]

He said to me... ... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
I said to him. ..... Turn sideways and look in the mirror!


He said to me. ..... Why don't women blink during sex?
I said to him.. . They don't have time


 
He said to me. . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
I said to him.. . I don't know; it has never happened.

He said to me. . Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and Good- looking?
I said to him . . . They already have boyfriends.


He said...What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
I said . . . a widow.

 
He said to me.... Why are married women heavier than single women?

I said to him . . . Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
[/size]
« Last Edit: 01 July 2010, 14:27:35 by skruntie »
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PhilRich

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Re: He said to me.
« Reply #1 on: 01 July 2010, 13:28:26 »

 ;D ;D ;D ;D :y
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fletchesmrs

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Re: He said to me.
« Reply #2 on: 01 July 2010, 13:30:33 »

 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D all true  :y :y :y
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Mr Skrunts

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Re: He said to me.
« Reply #3 on: 01 July 2010, 13:50:37 »

[size=12]

He said... Want a quickie?
She said... As opposed to what?

He said... I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said... You wear briefs, don't you?

He said... Do you love me just because my father left me a fortune?
She said... Not at all honey, I would love you no matter who left you the money.

He said... This coffee isn't fit for a pig!
She said... No problem, I'll get you some that is.

He said... Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you in the worst way.
She said... Well, you succeeded.

Priest... I don't think you will ever find another man like your late husband.
She said... Who's gonna look?

He said... You have a flat chest and need to shave your legs, have you ever been mistaken for a man?
She said... No, have you?

He said... Why do you women always try to impress us with your looks, not with your brains?
She said... Because there is a bigger chance that a man is a moron than he is blind.

He said... Let's go out and have some fun tonight.
She said... Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.

He said... Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?
She said... I would, but you're never there.

He said... Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you really badly.
She said... Well, you succeeded.

He said... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said... That's a good idea... You stand by the ironing board, while I sit on the sofa and fart.

He said... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
She said... Turn sideways and look in the mirror you fat blank. [/size]
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dbug

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Re: He said to me.
« Reply #4 on: 01 July 2010, 14:15:46 »

 ;D ;D ;D ;D :y
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Sixstring

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Re: He said to me.
« Reply #5 on: 01 July 2010, 16:31:10 »

I thought you'd appreciate those, Skruntie. Didn't know how to post them myself............LOL!
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Mr Skrunts

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Re: He said to me.
« Reply #6 on: 01 July 2010, 21:47:01 »

Quote
I thought you'd appreciate those, Skruntie. Didn't know how to post them myself............LOL!

Ah, now it makes sence, wonder who the email belonged to, saw Di as a recipient.

Yes liked them and found a few more, cheers, worth shareing I thought.   :y
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