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[STMO123]

[size=16]Keep them clean and politically correct please[/size]

Thats killed that thread then

[Taxi_Driver]

[size=16]Keep them clean and politically correct please[/size]

Guess the one i pm'd you about isnt allowed then  

[Chopsdad]

I just looked thro my mobile and this is the only one that maybe allowed..... :-/

A farmer said to his wife. If you had bigger tits we could rid of the cow. She said if you had a bigger dick we could get rid of the tractor driver!  

I don't think Rogerreno will like that one  

[Markjay]

I just looked thro my mobile and this is the only one that maybe allowed..... :-/

A farmer said to his wife. If you had bigger tits we could rid of the cow. She said if you had a bigger dick we could get rid of the tractor driver!  

I don't think Rogerreno will like that one  

Why? it sounds like a complement to me.  

[Chopsdad]

Try this:

A fat, hairy woman walks into a bar, raises her arm and asks 'Who's gonna buy a lady a drink then?'
'Give the ballerina a drink' says a drunk old man at the end of the bar.
She necks it down, raises her arm and asks again 'Who's gonna buy a lady a drink then?'
Get the ballerina another drink' answers the drunk.
The barman does as he's asked but then asks the drunk why he keeps calling her a ballerina.......
Any woman who can lift her leg that high, deserves a drink!

It's the cleanest I had.

[STMO123]

Try this:

A fat, hairy woman walks into a bar, raises her arm and asks 'Who's gonna buy a lady a drink then?'
'Give the ballerina a drink' says a drunk old man at the end of the bar.
She necks it down, raises her arm and asks again 'Who's gonna buy a lady a drink then?'
Get the ballerina another drink' answers the drunk.
The barman does as he's asked but then asks the drunk why he keeps calling her a ballerina.......
Any woman who can lift her leg that high, deserves a drink!

It's the cleanest I had.

Far too clean!  AA's spoiled it now

[Taxi_Driver]

I just looked thro my mobile and this is the only one that maybe allowed..... :-/

A farmer said to his wife. If you had bigger tits we could rid of the cow. She said if you had a bigger dick we could get rid of the tractor driver!  

I don't think Rogerreno will like that one  

Only a joke m8....sorry if it offended anyone  

[Chopsdad]

After no dates or sex for 5 years a woman goes to see chinese sex therapist, Dr Chang.
He says 'Rake of all ror crose, gret down on floor & craw reery reery fas to odderside of room'
So she does.
'Ok craw reery reery fas bac'
As she did Dr shook his head.
'Problem vewy vewy bad, worse case Ed Zachery disease I ever c, dat why u get no date'
She says ' God what's Ed Zachery disease?'
Doctor says 'It's where your face looks Ed Zachery like your arce'

[STMO123]

After no dates or sex for 5 years a woman goes to see chinese sex therapist, Dr Chang.
He says 'Rake of all ror crose, gret down on floor & craw reery reery fas to odderside of room'
So she does.
'Ok craw reery reery fas bac'
As she did Dr shook his head.
'Problem vewy vewy bad, worse case Ed Zachery disease I ever c, dat why u get no date'
She says ' God what's Ed Zachery disease?'
Doctor says 'It's where your face looks Ed Zachery like your arce'

 

[Chopsdad]

After no dates or sex for 5 years a woman goes to see chinese sex therapist, Dr Chang.
He says 'Rake of all ror crose, gret down on floor & craw reery reery fas to odderside of room'
So she does.
'Ok craw reery reery fas bac'
As she did Dr shook his head.
'Problem vewy vewy bad, worse case Ed Zachery disease I ever c, dat why u get no date'
She says ' God what's Ed Zachery disease?'
Doctor says 'It's where your face looks Ed Zachery like your arce'

 

Happy to help  

[supermop]

a clean and politically correct joke wouldn't really be a joke now would it.

[bob.dent]

a clean and politically correct joke wouldn't really be a joke now would it.

Sad but true!

[nixoro]

After no dates or sex for 5 years a woman goes to see chinese sex therapist, Dr Chang.
He says 'Rake of all ror crose, gret down on floor & craw reery reery fas to odderside of room'
So she does.
'Ok craw reery reery fas bac'
As she did Dr shook his head.
'Problem vewy vewy bad, worse case Ed Zachery disease I ever c, dat why u get no date'
She says ' God what's Ed Zachery disease?'
Doctor says 'It's where your face looks Ed Zachery like your arce'

Like it  

[Gwilym]

All of them very good

[Goonlord]

I like this one hope its not to rude or offends any one  

Once upon a time, in a nice little forest, there lived an orphaned bunny and an orphaned snake.  By a surprising coincidence, both were blind from birth.

One day, the bunny was hopping through the forest, and the snake was slithering through the forest, when the bunny tripped over the snake and fell down.
"Oh, my," said the bunny, "I'm terribly sorry.  I didn't mean to hurt you.  I've been blind since birth, so, I can't see where I'm going.  In fact, since I'm also an orphan, I don't even know what I am."
It's quite ok," replied the snake."  Actually, my story is as yours.  I too have been blind since birth, and also never knew my mother.  Tell you what, maybe I could slither all over you, and work out what you are so at least you'll have that going for you."
  
"Oh, that would be wonderful" replied the bunny.  So the snake slithered all over the bunny, and said, "Well, you're covered with soft fur, you have really long ears, your nose twitches, and you have a soft cottony tail.  I'd say that you must be a bunny rabbit."
"Oh, thank you, thank you," cried the bunny, in obvious excitement.  The bunny suggested to the snake, "Maybe I could feel you all over with my paw, and help you the same way that you've helped me."  So the bunny felt the snake all over, and remarked,

 

 

 

 

"Well, you're smooth and slippery, and you've a forked tongue, no backbone and no balls.  I'd say you must be a team leader, a supervisor or possibly someone in senior management."