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[Andy H]

I haven't the faintest idea what you are talking about.

I had an eye test once. Primary school.  I was shitting myself, in case it turned out I was going to be a Speccy.  Fortunately I passed* with flying colours.



*Though the oppswits never picked up I'm colour blind, useless tossers.

my school eye test at age 12:
Take your glasses off and read as much as you can on the chart.
Me - if i take my glasses off I can't see the chart
Just do as your told and stop being cheeky
Me (takes off glasses)- I  can't see the chart
Just read what you can - you can read can't you?
Me - i can tell you what I can remember from before I took my glasses off or I can put them back on & try ?
Sigh, OK, what can you read with glasses?
Me (reads whole chart)
Have you been examined by an optician?
Me - (very quietly) where do you think I got the glasses?
Self preservation kicked in at this point and I left before it got any weirder 

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

I haven't the faintest idea what you are talking about.

I had an eye test once. Primary school.  I was shitting myself, in case it turned out I was going to be a Speccy.  Fortunately I passed* with flying colours.



*Though the oppswits never picked up I'm colour blind, useless tossers.

How does that work, with a 32,000 pair cable and all? 

Guesswork.

Biggest I saw when I was on the tools was a 4000pair, which only had White/Orange, Slate/Red and Green/Black.  And I can only count to ten, as I'm not from Suffolk.

I was made to take a colourblindness test before I was given the job. Fail and no job. That was in 1969, before you were born 

That was one small step for man but one giant leap for mankind.

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

I did that about a month ago.
It allows them to take a more detailed look inside your eyes for damage or unhealthy areas than has previously been possible. They'll probably show you the images, which are interesting.

I reckon it's worth a tenner every couple of years, especially as I don't pay for the rest of the eye test.

How come you don't pay, Nick?

As far as I can see it is only old people and people in prison who are exempt

[Lizzie Zoom]

I did that about a month ago.
It allows them to take a more detailed look inside your eyes for damage or unhealthy areas than has previously been possible. They'll probably show you the images, which are interesting.

I reckon it's worth a tenner every couple of years, especially as I don't pay for the rest of the eye test.

How come you don't pay, Nick?

As far as I can see it is only old people and people in prison who are exempt

As a type 2 diabetic, and to keep the DVLA happy, I have to have regular, 6 / 12 month,  full eye tests with scans that show every detail of your eyes. They are always free and tell the experts if my eye sight is deteriorating or not as I get older.  These tests started, before I was 60, when I had to treat my diabetes with insulin.

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

I did that about a month ago.
It allows them to take a more detailed look inside your eyes for damage or unhealthy areas than has previously been possible. They'll probably show you the images, which are interesting.

I reckon it's worth a tenner every couple of years, especially as I don't pay for the rest of the eye test.

How come you don't pay, Nick?

As far as I can see it is only old people and people in prison who are exempt

As a type 2 diabetic, and to keep the DVLA happy, I have to have regular, 6 / 12 month,  full eye tests with scans that show every detail of your eyes. They are always free and tell the experts if my eye sight is deteriorating or not as I get older.  These tests started, before I was 60, when I had to treat my diabetes with insulin.

Lizzie.....can a comprehensive eye test 'pick up' diabetes?. I hear that some/many people are unaware they have it. I know, for example, that a dentist can often 'pick up' early signs of throat cancer.

[Viral_Jim]

Free tests can also be had through employer's vouchers if you work at a screen.

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

Free tests can also be had through employer's vouchers if you work at a screen.

I believe this can cause problems if used to excess.

[Lizzie Zoom]

I did that about a month ago.
It allows them to take a more detailed look inside your eyes for damage or unhealthy areas than has previously been possible. They'll probably show you the images, which are interesting.

I reckon it's worth a tenner every couple of years, especially as I don't pay for the rest of the eye test.

How come you don't pay, Nick?

As far as I can see it is only old people and people in prison who are exempt

As a type 2 diabetic, and to keep the DVLA happy, I have to have regular, 6 / 12 month,  full eye tests with scans that show every detail of your eyes. They are always free and tell the experts if my eye sight is deteriorating or not as I get older.  These tests started, before I was 60, when I had to treat my diabetes with insulin.

Lizzie.....can a comprehensive eye test 'pick up' diabetes?. I hear that some/many people are unaware they have it. I know, for example, that a dentist can often 'pick up' early signs of throat cancer.

No idea Opti, but I suspect the experts in the diabetic field who view these scans would see the damage they do, caused by in my case sugar, and come to a conclusion pointing towards someone having that illness.

[TheBoy]

I was made to take a colourblindness test before I was given the job. Fail and no job. That was in 1969, before you were born 

Yeah, it would have been picked up then, had I had an interview for the job...   ...which I didn't.

[Nick W]

I did that about a month ago.
It allows them to take a more detailed look inside your eyes for damage or unhealthy areas than has previously been possible. They'll probably show you the images, which are interesting.

I reckon it's worth a tenner every couple of years, especially as I don't pay for the rest of the eye test.

How come you don't pay, Nick?

As far as I can see it is only old people and people in prison who are exempt

Family history as both parents have been treated for glaucoma and cataracts, plus I had ocular hypertension a few years ago which also qualifies me.


Damage to the eyes is one of the earlier visible signs of diabetes, and eye tests have included a check for it for many years.

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

I did that about a month ago.
It allows them to take a more detailed look inside your eyes for damage or unhealthy areas than has previously been possible. They'll probably show you the images, which are interesting.

I reckon it's worth a tenner every couple of years, especially as I don't pay for the rest of the eye test.

How come you don't pay, Nick?

As far as I can see it is only old people and people in prison who are exempt

Family history as both parents have been treated for glaucoma and cataracts, plus I had ocular hypertension a few years ago which also qualifies me.


Damage to the eyes is one of the earlier visible signs of diabetes, and eye tests have included a check for it for many years.

I'm glad to learn you are not a malingerer.

[Sir Tigger KC]

I did that about a month ago.
It allows them to take a more detailed look inside your eyes for damage or unhealthy areas than has previously been possible. They'll probably show you the images, which are interesting.

I reckon it's worth a tenner every couple of years, especially as I don't pay for the rest of the eye test.

How come you don't pay, Nick?

As far as I can see it is only old people and people in prison who are exempt

Family history as both parents have been treated for glaucoma and cataracts, plus I had ocular hypertension a few years ago which also qualifies me.

Damage to the eyes is one of the earlier visible signs of diabetes, and eye tests have included a check for it for many years.

Hmmm maybe I shouldn't neglect my eye tests as I have family history of diabetes, as my Dad, my Uncle, and my Nan all had it.

Type one I think. 

So I need to find an Optician as well as a Dentist! 

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

I did that about a month ago.
It allows them to take a more detailed look inside your eyes for damage or unhealthy areas than has previously been possible. They'll probably show you the images, which are interesting.

I reckon it's worth a tenner every couple of years, especially as I don't pay for the rest of the eye test.

How come you don't pay, Nick?

As far as I can see it is only old people and people in prison who are exempt

Family history as both parents have been treated for glaucoma and cataracts, plus I had ocular hypertension a few years ago which also qualifies me.

Damage to the eyes is one of the earlier visible signs of diabetes, and eye tests have included a check for it for many years.

Hmmm maybe I shouldn't neglect my eye tests as I have family history of diabetes, as my Dad, my Uncle, and my Nan all had it.

Type one I think. 

So I need to find an Optician as well as a Dentist! 

Best check you are not pregnant as well.

The NHS needs to know if you need a scan for some reason.

[Sir Tigger KC]

I did that about a month ago.
It allows them to take a more detailed look inside your eyes for damage or unhealthy areas than has previously been possible. They'll probably show you the images, which are interesting.

I reckon it's worth a tenner every couple of years, especially as I don't pay for the rest of the eye test.

How come you don't pay, Nick?

As far as I can see it is only old people and people in prison who are exempt

Family history as both parents have been treated for glaucoma and cataracts, plus I had ocular hypertension a few years ago which also qualifies me.

Damage to the eyes is one of the earlier visible signs of diabetes, and eye tests have included a check for it for many years.

Hmmm maybe I shouldn't neglect my eye tests as I have family history of diabetes, as my Dad, my Uncle, and my Nan all had it.

Type one I think. 

So I need to find an Optician as well as a Dentist! 

Best check you are not pregnant as well.

The NHS needs to know if you need a scan for some reason.

Yes it's a strange world we live in, where a man can get knocked up by a woman with a penis! 

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

I did that about a month ago.
It allows them to take a more detailed look inside your eyes for damage or unhealthy areas than has previously been possible. They'll probably show you the images, which are interesting.

I reckon it's worth a tenner every couple of years, especially as I don't pay for the rest of the eye test.

How come you don't pay, Nick?

As far as I can see it is only old people and people in prison who are exempt

Family history as both parents have been treated for glaucoma and cataracts, plus I had ocular hypertension a few years ago which also qualifies me.

Damage to the eyes is one of the earlier visible signs of diabetes, and eye tests have included a check for it for many years.

Hmmm maybe I shouldn't neglect my eye tests as I have family history of diabetes, as my Dad, my Uncle, and my Nan all had it.

Type one I think. 

So I need to find an Optician as well as a Dentist! 

Best check you are not pregnant as well.

The NHS needs to know if you need a scan for some reason.

Yes it's a strange world we live in, where a man can get knocked up by a woman with a penis! 

Yes....bepenised women are all the rage at the moment....but it's good for society to be inclusive.