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Messages - Mr Skrunts

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General Discussion Area / Re: Sticky for Jokes
« on: 20 November 2018, 13:55:29 »
I was standin next to this bloke in the changing room at my local gym yesterday when a mobile phone rings. He was getting dry so he puts it on loudspeaker. I thought straightaway wot a smug bastard!

MAN: "Hello"

WOMAN: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the gym?"

MAN: "Yes"

WOMAN: "I am at the Metro Centre now and found this beautiful leather coat.

It' s only 1,000. Is it OK if I buy it?"

MAN: "Sure, ..go ahead if you like it that much."

WOMAN: "I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new 2018 models. I saw one I really liked."

MAN: "How much?"

WOMAN: "90,000"

MAN: "OK, but for that price I want it with all the options."

WOMAN: "Great! Oh, and one more thing .... The house I wanted last year is back on the market. They're asking 950,000".

MAN: "Well, then go ahead and give them an offer of 900,000. They will probably take it. If not, we can go the extra 50 thousand.

WOMAN: "OK. I'll see you later! I love you so much!!"

MAN: "Bye! I love you, too."

The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are staring at him in astonishment, mouths agape.....He smiles and asks: "Anyone know who this oppsin phone belongs to?"

General Discussion Area / AGGGGGH - Building Societys
« on: 19 November 2018, 09:47:31 »
I started a Monthly saver account in Dec last year, was told all the details over the phone etc etc, the main pointa were I could make one withdrawal a year and paying any ammount I wanted upto a specific account. 8)

Just rung up to confirm the maturity date to make my annual withdrawal only to find out the account tranfers to a basic account for for future saving.
Why do they all make a play on words rather than just telling the basics as it should be.  I was under the impression I could make the withdrawal and carry on, now it ends up creating yet annother account (will be the 7th with that BS . . . .WHY)     I need to chill. :-X

Palm oli is in a hell of a lot of products.yŷ :o

Including the chip pans in a lot of chippy's up and down the country. :-\

Mine gave me a warning that my mcafee licence had expired yesterday . . . . . funny thing is I dont have it installed. :-\

General Discussion Area / Re: AA v others
« on: 31 October 2018, 13:15:32 »
I paid 225 last 2 years.

I have the whole kit apart from cover abroad inc the Garage repair cover on my Elite. :-X

Had to challenge them though as the renewal cost came in at 300+

Newbie Welcome Area / Re: Hello!
« on: 28 October 2018, 22:58:58 »
Hi, welcome to the forum.  :y

General Discussion Area / Re: Sticky for Jokes
« on: 18 September 2018, 15:25:07 »
A flat chested young woman goes out looking for a new bra one day.

She tries shop after shop trying to find a size 28A yet she can't get one anywhere.

Finally, in desperation, she tries her fortunes in a little unmentionables shop run by an woman who's hard of hearing.

"Have you got anything in size 28A?" asks the young woman.

"What was that, dear?" says the old woman.

The young woman repeats herself again.

Still the old woman can't hear her, so the young woman lifts up her T-shirt baring her breasts and says, "Have you got anything for these?"

The old woman peers at the woman's boobs and says, "No, dear. Have you tried Clearasil?"

General Discussion Area / Re: Dead Person
« on: 07 September 2018, 01:22:52 »
He always struck me as the kinda guy who enjoyed life....... and women:)

Mostly women!  ;D   . . . . Loni Anderson ::)

RIP Burt!  :y

General Discussion Area / Re: omega/caterra
« on: 05 September 2018, 23:24:11 »
Prefer the V8 version. 8)

There is one of the members that posted his with quite a lot of upgrades to his catera. :y

General Discussion Area / Re: Sat Nav Choice
« on: 05 September 2018, 17:34:57 »
Carry an upto date map in the car all the time :y

Thought about the double din sat nav audio but dont use the car enough allthough I do have a radio problem (tuning in) I have put that down to the aerial. :-\

Allways have a phone or 2 on me and yes both are now 4G but ws put off witth a friends new Galaxy 8 getting us lost several times on google maps. >:(

Ultimeately I like a large screen sat nav, Garmin is 6.9" free udates 4 times a year for life on maps and safety and plenty of bells and whistles to keep me amused. 8)

Seems I have tlaked myself into the garmin lol ::)

General Discussion Area / Sat Nav Choice
« on: 05 September 2018, 12:39:00 »
Allways been a fan of Tomtom my current one being the Tomtom XXL.

Like the the large screen and ease of use, but sadly allthough maps are up to date am finding the maps are not acurate, junctions (local ones) are just classeda straight through (no stopping)  Allthought the SPECS carmera are listed on the A61 after leaving the M1 the speeds are wrong etc.

So thinking of going Garmin DriveSmart 61LMT-D with Full Europe Maps 6" Sat Nav

Any thoughts Tomtom versus Garmin? :y

General Discussion Area / Re: Broadband
« on: 31 August 2018, 19:55:41 »
16 quid off?  ???

Ours is only 13 per month in total with Plusnet?

With or wothout line rental?

General Discussion Area / Re: Coke
« on: 29 August 2018, 16:35:53 »
Why on earth did you think a convenience store selling impulse items would be cheaper than the chippy.

I won't ask why you are taking your ex out for posh nosh - you do know how to treat a girl :D

I asked for a can, she thought about the cost but went ahead anyway, cans are about .70p but i never think to compare the 330ml@.70p verse 500ml@1.30 cost :-\

I buy the 30 pack of cans for 10 (.30p each) just gone up from 7.50 :y

General Discussion Area / Re: Coke
« on: 29 August 2018, 16:29:25 »
Two words...

Sugar Tax ;)

Diet Coke, No tax

General Discussion Area / Coke
« on: 28 August 2018, 00:17:02 »
Picked my ex girlfriend up from work tonight and we normally nip to the chippy for a bite to eat and I generally grab a can of diet coke to drink.

Thinking I was smart I asked her to grab a can from a morrisons petrol station thinking it would save me some money.  Sadly they only had the 500ml bottles costing 1.30.

Just looked on a compare site, cheapest 500ml was 1.29.  Yet a 2l bottle of diet coke caffine free is 166 (or 2 for 3.00)

Day light robbery, and I thought petrol was exspensive. :-\

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