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[bluehawk]

The four Goldberg brothers, Lowell, Norman, Hiram, and Max,
invented and developed the first automobile air-conditioner.
On July 17, 1946, the temperature in Detroit was 97 degrees.

The four brothers walked into old man Henry Ford's Office
and sweet-talked his secretary into telling him that four
gentlemen were there with the most exciting innovation in the
auto Industry since the electric starter.

Henry was curious and invited them into his office.
They refused and instead asked that he come out to the
parking lot to their car.

They persuaded him to get into the car, which was about 130
degrees, turned on the air conditioner, and cooled the car off immediately..

The old man got very excited and invited them back to the office,
where he offered them $3 million for the patent.

The brothers refused, saying they would settle for $2 million, but they
wanted the recognition by having a label,
'The Goldberg Air-Conditioner,' on the dashboard of each car in which it
was installed..

Now old man Ford was more than just a little anti-Semitic, and there was no
way he was going to put the Goldberg's name on two million Fords.

They haggled back and forth for about two hours and finally agreed on
$4 million and that just their first names would be shown.

And so to this day, all Ford air conditioners show --
Lo, Norm, Hi, and Max
--on the controls.


I can hear your groans from here.. Control yourself.

I don't write this stuff!!

[bluehawk]

1+2 = 3

Until a child tells you what they are thinking, we can't even begin to imagine how their mind is working....
Little Zachary was doing very badly in math.
His parents had tried everything...tutors, mentors,
flash cards, special learning centers.
In short, everything they could think of to help his math.

Finally, in a last ditch effort, they took Zachary down and enrolled him In the local Catholic school. After the first day, little Zachary came home with a very serious look on his face. He didn't even kiss his mother hello. Instead, he went straight to his room and started studying.

Books and papers were spread out all over the room and little Zachary was hard at work. His mother was amazed. She called him down to dinner.

To her shock, the minute he was done, he marched back to his room without a word, and in no time, he was back hitting the books as hard as before.

This went on for some time, day after day, while the mother tried to understand what made all the difference.

Finally, little Zachary brought home his report Card.. He quietly laid it on the table, went up to his room and hit the books. With great trepidation, His Mom looked at it and to her great surprise, Little Zachary got an 'A' in math. She could no longer hold her curiosity.. She went to his room and said, 'Son, what was it? Was it the nuns?' Little Zachary looked at her and shook his head, no.. 'Well, then,' she replied, Was it the books, the discipline, the structure, the uniforms? WHAT WAS IT?'

Little Zachary looked at her and said, 'Well, on the first day of school when I saw that guy nailed to the plus sign, I knew they weren't fooling around

[bluehawk]

A Farmer's Logical Explanation

A TV Interview which was never aired in the UK ....
You know there are so many TV channels, each starved of new programmes.
In a rural programme for farmers, a female TV reporter seeking the main cause of Mad Cow disease,
arranged for an interview with a farmer who may have some theories on the matter....
The interview was as follows:
The lady reporter: "I am here to collect information on the possible sources of Mad Cow Disease.
Can you offer any reason for this disease?"
The farmer stared at the reporter and said: "Do you know that a bull mounts a cow only once a year?"
Reporter (obviously embarrassed): "Well, sir, that's a new piece of information but what's the relation between this phenomenon and Mad Cow disease?"
Farmer: "And, madam, do you know that we milk a cow twice a day?"
Reporter: "Sir, this is really valuable information, but what about getting to the point?"
Farmer: "I am getting to the point, madam. Just imagine, if I was playing with your tits twice a day and only screwing you once a year, wouldn't you get mad?"
The programme was never aired....

[Jimbob]

Superb! 

[dbug]

 

[STMO999]

Very good.

[waspy]

Excellent

[Dishevelled Den]

  very good 

[Mr Skrunts]

Excellent, keep em coming.   

[Hannah Judes Dad]

I like that alot

[Richie London]

very good. 

[PhilRich]

Fan Bloody Tastic!

[Entwood]

Very good !!