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Author Topic: Things that make you go Hmmmmmm  (Read 2042 times)

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HolyCount

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Things that make you go Hmmmmmm
« on: 04 April 2008, 18:01:52 »

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby"  when babies wake up every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

What is the speed of darkness?

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?

Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?

Do you cry under water?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Did you ever stop and wonder......

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum."

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the toilet is?

Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway ?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream ??

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from ?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Stop singing and read on . . . . . . . . .. .

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

 

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Entwood

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Re: Things that make you go Hmmmmmm
« Reply #1 on: 04 April 2008, 18:10:49 »

 :y :y :y :y
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Dazzler

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Re: Things that make you go Hmmmmmm
« Reply #2 on: 04 April 2008, 18:11:03 »

Very good ;D
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Martin_1962

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Re: Things that make you go Hmmmmmm
« Reply #3 on: 04 April 2008, 18:19:04 »

Quote
If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

-136.5c
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Debs.

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Re: Things that make you go Hmmmmmm
« Reply #4 on: 04 April 2008, 18:20:51 »

Quote
If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?
 

Love it!  ;D
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waspy

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Re: Things that make you go Hmmmmmm
« Reply #5 on: 04 April 2008, 19:56:31 »

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

How very true  :y :y
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HolyCount

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Re: Things that make you go Hmmmmmm
« Reply #6 on: 04 April 2008, 20:01:23 »

My favourite are these two:

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum."

What WERE they thinking of ???
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mars

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Re: Things that make you go Hmmmmmm
« Reply #7 on: 04 April 2008, 21:26:27 »

 ;D ;D ;D :y
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Taxi_Driver

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Re: Things that make you go Hmmmmmm
« Reply #8 on: 04 April 2008, 22:06:05 »

Quote
Quote
If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

-136.5c

I have to disagree Martin........everyone knows 0 x 2 = 0 , so it will be the same temp  :y ;D
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Martin_1962

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Re: Things that make you go Hmmmmmm
« Reply #9 on: 05 April 2008, 08:54:29 »

Quote
Quote
Quote
If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

-136.5c

I have to disagree Martin........everyone knows 0 x 2 = 0 , so it will be the same temp  :y ;D


Temperature is measured in odd ways, distances 0 is 0 but with temperature unless you use Kelvin 0c is 273K
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Debs.

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Re: Things that make you go Hmmmmmm
« Reply #10 on: 05 April 2008, 09:01:08 »

Quote
Quote
Quote
Quote
If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

-136.5c

I have to disagree Martin........everyone knows 0 x 2 = 0 , so it will be the same temp  :y ;D


Temperature is measured in odd ways, distances 0 is 0 but with temperature unless you use Kelvin 0c is 273K

Absolutely!  :y
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korum

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Re: Things that make you go Hmmmmmm
« Reply #11 on: 05 April 2008, 10:44:40 »

Quote
Quote
Quote
If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

-136.5c

I have to disagree Martin........everyone knows 0 x 2 = 0 , so it will be the same temp  :y ;D


-8.88888888888889
convert to fahrenheit half it then convert back ;D
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HolyCount

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Re: Things that make you go Hmmmmmm
« Reply #12 on: 05 April 2008, 11:42:28 »

Quote
Quote
Quote
Quote
Quote
If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

-136.5c

I have to disagree Martin........everyone knows 0 x 2 = 0 , so it will be the same temp  :y ;D


Temperature is measured in odd ways, distances 0 is 0 but with temperature unless you use Kelvin 0c is 273K

Absolutely!  :y

Beat me to it -- but I wasn't going to put it so cleverley or subtley  :-?
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file28

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Re: Things that make you go Hmmmmmm
« Reply #13 on: 05 April 2008, 11:50:42 »

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
we got a light in our freezer
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maria

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Re: Things that make you go Hmmmmmm
« Reply #14 on: 05 April 2008, 11:53:43 »

Like it :y
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