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[prestigesec]

I need some advice please 1st of all i hate drugs whether it be a joint or some coke or whatever i am totally against it never used it and never want to.

Problem being my girlfriend who i love with all my heart does when she goes out with the girls or to a party, take coke and was open enough to tell me that she did. Her friends are all in that kind of circle they all do it they all got money and so on. I went to a couple of parties with her and her friends to give them all a chance and to be honest there was no bad behaviour or anything like that, but i just hated the fact that everyone there was on drugs.

My girlfriend says she does it because after a few drinks she is rotten but when she takes coke she is fine and this is true with her. Last party we where at i nearly ended up fighting with someone over arguing about drugs i put my point across and he didnt like it anyway i obviously embarresed my girlfriend and no longer will meet up with her friends.

What i need to know is in this day and age am i being to pig headed or should i stick to my beliefs and tell her to stop it or i go? Dont want it to come to this but just dropped her of now with her mates i am at home and will be pulling my hair out all night, i know she would never cheat on me or anything like that but i just know this once or twice a month taking coke at parties will always bug me. Help help help

[bertiecbx550]

sorry but i`m totally against illegal drugs....lost my eldest nephew to them and almost my 3rd nephew till he saw what heroin and crack had done to his eldest brother before he died 3years ago..we buried him on x-mas eve.... it still hurts to this day my own opinion would be to try and help her to give em up cause they will take you over in the end...

[albitz]

your right they are wrong (i feel strongly about this for personal reasons) stick to your beliefs and hope that your girlfriend (with your gentle persuasion)grows out of it rather than it becoming a big problem in her life ,as it does for many people.

[phil her up]

Coke taking is more widespread than most people think, due partly to it being cheaper than a few years ago. A mate of mine got addicted & blew 30K in a year :-/

[prestigesec]

I say this to her to not bother with it but she just comes back with its not dangerous its fine and that she is responsble and that coke is not that dangerous i am in the opinion that they are all dangerous.

[albitz]

believe me,your right ,she is naive.

[prestigesec]

Coke taking is more widespread than most people think, due partly to it being cheaper than a few years ago. A mate of mine got addicted & blew 30K in a year :-/

I have spoke to a couple of my friends about this and they suprised me by saying they take it now and again and that it is more common than you would think.

[HolyCount]

Easy for me to say mate -- but I am zero tolerance on this ---- In your place I am afraid there are two choices: She cleans up her act, or I wouldn't want to know.

It's a difficult road and there are so many things that can get out of hand, one thing leading to another etc.

Do a bit of research, no good comes of a persistant coke habit

[prestigesec]

Easy for me to say mate -- but I am zero tolerance on this ---- In your place I am afraid there are two choices: She cleans up her act, or I wouldn't want to know.

It's a difficult road and there are so many things that can get out of hand, one thing leading to another etc.

Do a bit of research, no good comes of a persistant coke habit

Am lookin on net about it now dont get me wrong she is not takin it everyday cause i wouldnt be with her if she did, just once or twice a month but thats once or twice to much for me. Just brings massive argument when i go on about it she says i am not open minded enough.

[Debs.]

Drug taking is a selfish activity; the user doesn`t seem to care for the consequences for themselves (and others) and especially-so for the one`s that care about them.

Coke is serious.....it`s not a "take it once in a while for fun" thing.
It`s miserable and sordid and ruins relationships, health, wealth and friendships.....for the 'fiscal and interpersonal cost' and life-consequences I cannot see a single redeeming aspect to the use of so-called 'hard drugs'.

It need not mean the end of your relationship; but surely if the partnership is to survive the drugs must surely go.
.....and there`s only one person whom is in charge of that decision!

I`d imagine peer-pressure may have a part to play in your partner`s casual Coke use; often in a group people feel pressured and later explain away their actions with salving excuses. ("It keeps me sober etc.")

Have you talked through your negative-feelings about the 'issue' with her?.....Sometimes users just can`t see the real situation and how it affects others.

[Kevin Wood]

I have no idea how dangerous coke is but, just as alcohol doesn't quite do it for her, one day she'll decide that coke doean't either. If she's in an environment where drugs are available it's not hard for her to get in deeper. I agree. She's naiive.

What you do about it only you can answer really. If it's driving you to spend your bank holidays apart because you can't share the same friends, circles, etc. that's not helping your relationship, and you should make sure she knows this. I hope for her sake resolving it means more to her than her habit.

Kevin

[prestigesec]

Drug taking is a selfish activity; the user doesn`t seem to care for the consequences for themselves (and others) and especially-so for the one`s that care about them.

Coke is serious.....it`s not a "take it once in a while for fun" thing.
It`s miserable and sordid and ruins relationships, health, wealth and friendships.....for the 'fiscal and interpersonal cost' and life-consequences I cannot see a single redeeming aspect to the use of so-called 'hard drugs'.

It need not mean the end of your relationship; but surely if the partnership is to survive the drugs must surely go.
.....and there`s only one person whom is in charge of that decision!

I`d imagine peer-pressure may have a part to play in your partner`s casual Coke use; often in a group people feel pressured and later explain away their actions with salving excuses. ("It keeps me sober etc.")

Have you talked through your negative-feelings about the 'issue' with her?.....Sometimes users just can`t see the real situation and how it affects others.

We can never seem to discuss it as it always ends in a big argument she has done it for the past 10 years and cannot see why i hate it but dont want to lose her its a pain in the arse to be honest i just dont know how to get it through to her.

[Lazydocker]

No question... She needs to clean up her act. If it was harmless then it wouldn't be an ILLEGAL drug. Drugs are bad, no two ways about it, and they are addictive. From what you've said she is showing the typical signs of an addict... "It's perfectly safe", "it's better than alcohol"

I hate to say it but... If she doesn't clean up her act then you will eventually end up visiting her in hospital (if you're lucky) or, worse still, on a slab. Regardless of the potential problems with OD on the drug itself, what else is it being cut with? These things are NEVER pure...

That's my bit... Bin the drugs, with your full help and support, or bin her.

[prestigesec]

I have no idea how dangerous coke is but, just as alcohol doesn't quite do it for her, one day she'll decide that coke doean't either. If she's in an environment where drugs are available it's not hard for her to get in deeper. I agree. She's naiive.

What you do about it only you can answer really. If it's driving you to spend your bank holidays apart because you can't share the same friends, circles, etc. that's not helping your relationship, and you should make sure she knows this. I hope for her sake resolving it means more to her than her habit.

Kevin

She kind of makes it sound like i am the one that is causing us to be apart on bank holiday, yet she said she would never ever want me to touch drugs bit hypicritical i think.

[Lazydocker]

Drug taking is a selfish activity; the user doesn`t seem to care for the consequences for themselves (and others) and especially-so for the one`s that care about them.

Coke is serious.....it`s not a "take it once in a while for fun" thing.
It`s miserable and sordid and ruins relationships, health, wealth and friendships.....for the 'fiscal and interpersonal cost' and life-consequences I cannot see a single redeeming aspect to the use of so-called 'hard drugs'.

It need not mean the end of your relationship; but surely if the partnership is to survive the drugs must surely go.
.....and there`s only one person whom is in charge of that decision!

I`d imagine peer-pressure may have a part to play in your partner`s casual Coke use; often in a group people feel pressured and later explain away their actions with salving excuses. ("It keeps me sober etc.")

Have you talked through your negative-feelings about the 'issue' with her?.....Sometimes users just can`t see the real situation and how it affects others.

We can never seem to discuss it as it always ends in a big argument she has done it for the past 10 years and cannot see why i hate it but dont want to lose her its a pain in the arse to be honest i just dont know how to get it through to her.

I can remember seeing a presentation when I was at school about the results of drug taking... If only you could get hold of some of the pictures I saw you'd probably put her off for life!! I know it turned the stomach of everyone in the room, including a couple of the staff who were former armed forces personnel, and had seen the real side of war/NI first hand.