Thursday 16th October.....3.00 am.
We were abruptly awoken by a noise that would make the first exchange in a nuclear war sound like a fart in a biscuit tin.....BBBAAANNNGGG.
I believe my first words were something to the effect of......What the f**king hell was that?
Hard to believe but it took me almost five minutes to find out exactly what had happened. I looked everywhere before I finally found a huge wagon in our conservatory. A bloodied and bewildered driver stared back at me with eyes the size of dinner plates.
I immediately called 999 and asked for police assistance along with an ambulance. Twenty minutes later they turned up. Five minutes after this two fire engines also arrived.
The driver, who spoke little english, provided a negative breath test and was subsequently taken to hospital. The consensus of the conversation being that he may have fallen asleep at the wheel.
Luckily for us the lorry had 'rampaged' a significant distance through our neighbours land before reaching us. Impact speed was probably less than 20 MPH.
The emergency services (about ten people in total) left at around 6.30 am....This was when Mrs Opti suddenly became very distressed and fearful.
I now have to deal with my insurance company who predictably are making things far from easy. A structural engineer has already been and the loss adjuster is due on Tuesday.
The garden is completely trashed. This was made worse when they removed the lorry because there was much 'greenery' in the form of mature trees and bushes to cut away. This took four hours.
Still, I'm not called Opti for nothing and far worse things happen every day throughout the world.

Thanks for yous concern, chaps.







