Barnsley folk

[STEMO]

Just been down to Barnsley tyres to have two fronts fitted, I ordered them last week. Paul, the manager, says to me "Who said tha needed tyres, lad?". I said "I did. Winters coming and I like 8mm underneath me". "Tha's too much brass, lad, I reckon there's nearly 6mm there". "Nah.......maybe four and a half". "I like Krispy Kreme donuts, me, does tha fancy a bet?" "Errrrr........ " "Reet, pass us gauge"

Five and a half. I'll be calling in with some donuts tomorrow   

That's Barnsley folk for yer. Don't think many tyre fitters would tell you that you're tyres are fine, see you in a few months.

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

Winter tyres are for nancy boys.

I have 570 BHP and 530 lb Ft torque and I don't need them, even though I only have 2 driven wheels.

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

In my youth I ran all my cars on remoulds.

Then my friend suggested we should 'borrow' four brand new tyres fitted to the then new Ford Sierra on display at my local Ford dealer.

We got caught and the coppers kicked the shit out of us even though we offered no resistance.

[RossPhim]

I'm struggling to find the bit in Stemo's original post where he mentions Winter tyres?? 

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

Battered and beaten we were slung in the cells for an early morning court appearance.

I can laugh about it now.

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

I'm struggling to find the bit in Stemo's original post where he mentions Winter tyres?? 

My mistake. When he wrote 'winter' in a northern accent I assumed he was talking about winter tyres.

[STEMO]

Battered and beaten we were slung in the cells for an early morning court appearance.

I can laugh about it now.

Did they hit you on the head? That would explain a lot. 

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

Battered and beaten we were slung in the cells for an early morning court appearance.

I can laugh about it now.

Did they hit you on the head? That would explain a lot. 

The bastards hit us everywhere. They got off on it.

Of course this was around 1982 and the police could get away with just about anything.

[STEMO]

Battered and beaten we were slung in the cells for an early morning court appearance.

I can laugh about it now.

Did they hit you on the head? That would explain a lot. 

The bastards hit us everywhere. They got off on it.

Of course this was around 1982 and the police could get away with just about anything.

Well....if you didn't want a beating, you shouldn't have been thieving. None of that around our way. 

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

Battered and beaten we were slung in the cells for an early morning court appearance.

I can laugh about it now.

Did they hit you on the head? That would explain a lot. 

The bastards hit us everywhere. They got off on it.

Of course this was around 1982 and the police could get away with just about anything.

Well....if you didn't want a beating, you shouldn't have been thieving. None of that around our way. 

Perhaps I'll retire to sunny Barnsley and leave my door open just like in the good old days. I won't be long. Get the kettle on.

[STEMO]

Battered and beaten we were slung in the cells for an early morning court appearance.

I can laugh about it now.

Did they hit you on the head? That would explain a lot. 

The bastards hit us everywhere. They got off on it.

Of course this was around 1982 and the police could get away with just about anything.

Well....if you didn't want a beating, you shouldn't have been thieving. None of that around our way. 

Perhaps I'll retire to sunny Barnsley and leave my door open just like in the good old days. I won't be long. Get the kettle on.

No, I meant in Liverpool in 1982. 

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

Battered and beaten we were slung in the cells for an early morning court appearance.

I can laugh about it now.

Did they hit you on the head? That would explain a lot. 

The bastards hit us everywhere. They got off on it.

Of course this was around 1982 and the police could get away with just about anything.

Well....if you didn't want a beating, you shouldn't have been thieving. None of that around our way. 

Perhaps I'll retire to sunny Barnsley and leave my door open just like in the good old days. I won't be long. Get the kettle on.

No, I meant in Liverpool in 1982. 

Cilla Black was always banging on about how much she missed  Liverpool. Usually from her luxury homes in Surrey and Spain.

[STEMO]

Went down this morning bearing donuts 

[dave the builder]

had the same when I took Mrs Builder's astra estate for winter tyres local to me
"they don't need replacing"
I said fit the new tyres and give me back the part worn ones (about 5mm left)
nice to know that not everyone is out to rip you off