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[STEMO]

Went to Junction 32 retail park this aft. Mrs wandered into Next saying, "We could do with a new sofa, and they have some good ex displays in here". Saw one (which, I admit, was good value) at £990, reduced from £2750. Decided we'd have it, found a young shop assistant and went off to pay. Debit card in machine, £990 debited, lovely jubbly.
Not quite. "When are you picking it up?". "What?" Here are the business cards of two local companies who will pick it up and deliver it. It has to be gone in two days.
No mention of this before we paid, manager called. 'dangle berries' the young assistant for not telling us and asks if we'd like a refund. Yes, please, I'm not ringing the local man and van, hoping he can fit me in. I thought this was Next, not Joe's Junk Shop.
Refund given, that will be back in your bank within a week. Mrs wants to know why I'm walking around the shops with a fûckin face on me.

[Sir Tigger KC]

I can already hear the heavy sighs that Mrs STEMO will emit every time she sits down next to you on the old soda! 

You'd better get down to DFS quickly if you want some peace and quiet!     

[STEMO]

I can already hear the heavy sighs that Mrs STEMO will emit every time she sits down next to you on the old soda! 

You'd better get down to DFS quickly if you want some peace and quiet!     

Her? What about me, me me? Go to the shops, lend Next a grand for a week and come home again 

All for a soda 

[Sir Tigger KC]

You should have just sucked it up and called Man-With-A-Van.... 

Your life will become intolerable until Mrs STEMO has her new sofa! 

[STEMO]

You should have just sucked it up and called Man-With-A-Van.... 

Your life will become intolerable until Mrs STEMO has her new sofa! 

You reckon? 

[Sir Tigger KC]

Yep. 

You've now established that you are willing to buy a new sofa, so it's only a matter of time. 

[Rangie]

Roof rack on the faithful Astra & a couple of straps would have done the job, I've seen eastern Europeans clear a whole house like that..😂

[STEMO]

Yep. 

You've now established that you are willing to buy a new sofa, so it's only a matter of time. 

She'll do as she's told, good old fashioned relationship here 

[Migv6 le Frog Fan]

We can safely assume she never looks at OOF then. 

[BazaJT]

And I take it you have her permission to say so

[pscocoa]

Make sure anything you buy will fit through doors....

[Sir Tigger KC]

Yep. 

You've now established that you are willing to buy a new sofa, so it's only a matter of time. 

She'll do as she's told, good old fashioned relationship here 

That's what you think. 

Before long you'll be settling down on your new sofa, wondering how TF did this happen!   

[STEMO]

Make sure anything you buy will fit through doors....

Surely the people who manufacture furniture wouldn't make it too big to go through a standard 6'6"x 2'6" door, Phil?

[STEMO]

We can safely assume she never looks at OOF then. 

Faceache, twátter, maybe teacher forums, not OOF.

[STEMO]

Yep. 

You've now established that you are willing to buy a new sofa, so it's only a matter of time. 

She'll do as she's told, good old fashioned relationship here 

That's what you think. 

Before long you'll be settling down on your new sofa, wondering how TF did this happen!   

I said I was happy to buy the fickin thing, didn't I? Just not having the local pikey turning up in a flatbed with a rain sodden sofa on the back. I have standards to maintain, don't you know?