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Author Topic: A moral question.  (Read 2777 times)

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Vamps

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A moral question.
« on: 11 October 2008, 21:12:45 »

My 16 year old stepson came in last night, having had a drink, not sure how much, didn’t see him. He came in, took the dog out and disappeared upstairs, I did speak with him regards his scooter as it was not in the garage.  :-?

To his credit he had had a drink so left his scooter at his elder brothers house and got a lift home, :y :y :y they were in a village about 3 miles away.

Spoke with him today, not in trouble but I wanted to know where he had been drinking and what.

He had been served in 2 pubs in Sedgefield.  Now he is recently 16 and looks about 14, if that. ::) ::) ::)

Points to note.
Never had any problems with him as a Kid, very little anyway, he is a good lad.
I was 16 once as well.

Not so much that he had been drinking but that he was getting served, now I do have a problem when everyone gets on about young people drinking, as behind this is nearly always an adult, either serving or buying for them.

Do I have a little word with the police, about the pub’s in question, or let it go. :question
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webby23

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Re: A moral question.
« Reply #1 on: 11 October 2008, 21:16:23 »

If it was me I would pop down to the pub and have a word with the manager.

Your lad doesnt sound a bad one, but another kid could get canned up in there and things may end up alot worse.

Not the kids fault at the end of the day, kids will do what they can get away with, but something needs doing about an establishment that sells to underage drinkers.

Just my 2p worth !
« Last Edit: 11 October 2008, 21:23:41 by webby23 »
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JamesV6CDX

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Re: A moral question.
« Reply #2 on: 11 October 2008, 21:18:01 »

When I was 16, my mates (same age) and I would walk up the local, regularly have three or so pints, and walk back merry. Never did any harm, and had our heads screwed on.

Yes it was naughty, but also pretty harmless because we were always brought up to enjoy alcohol but not abuse it.

It sounds like he was totally in control, especially by not riding his moped, and the fact he openly admitted it means he hasn't got much to hide.

I personally would leave it... but that's just me :y
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Lizzie_Zoom

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Re: A moral question.
« Reply #3 on: 11 October 2008, 21:22:05 »

Quote
]If it was me I would go to the pop down to the pub and have a word with the manager[/highlight].

Your lad doesnt sound a bad one, but another kid could get canned up in there and things may end up alot worse.

Not the kids fault at the end of the day, kids will do what they can get away with, but something needs doing about an establishment that sells to underage drinkers.

Just my 2p worth !

Yes I agree, and make it clear that next time you will complain to the Police! >:( >:(

Although we all drank in pubs when we were barely 16 years old, it is certainly not good due to all the dangers they can face as indeed we could have done! :o :o :o  I think it is the potential driving whilst drunk that would worry me the most. :o :o
« Last Edit: 11 October 2008, 21:22:44 by Lizzie_Zoom »
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Vamps

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Re: A moral question.
« Reply #4 on: 11 October 2008, 21:22:22 »

Quote
When I was 16, my mates (same age) and I would walk up the local, regularly have three or so pints, and walk back merry. Never did any harm, and had our heads screwed on.

Yes it was naughty, but also pretty harmless because we were always brought up to enjoy alcohol but not abuse it.

It sounds like he was totally in control, especially by not riding his moped, and the fact he openly admitted it means he hasn't got much to hide.

I personally would leave it... but that's just me :y


I am surprised James, thought you would have had me sending in the armed response unit. ;D ;D ;D
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JamesV6CDX

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Re: A moral question.
« Reply #5 on: 11 October 2008, 21:22:59 »

Quote
Quote
When I was 16, my mates (same age) and I would walk up the local, regularly have three or so pints, and walk back merry. Never did any harm, and had our heads screwed on.

Yes it was naughty, but also pretty harmless because we were always brought up to enjoy alcohol but not abuse it.

It sounds like he was totally in control, especially by not riding his moped, and the fact he openly admitted it means he hasn't got much to hide.

I personally would leave it... but that's just me :y


I am surprised James, thought you would have had me sending in the armed response unit. ;D ;D ;D

Oh hush....  :P  ;D
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Markjay

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Re: A moral question.
« Reply #6 on: 11 October 2008, 21:48:55 »

Drinking can be a very slippery slope, especially for young people. I would keep monitoring his behaviour just to make sure that he keep acting responsibly, as he has done, and if so then I would be happy with that.

As for the Pubs, it would depend to a great extent of the nature of the said establishment,. If it is a small local pub where the publican is behind the bar most of the time, then yes a quiet word would be appropriate. But if it is one of them chain-owned large commercial pubs, then I suspect no-one on-premises would really care, so it’s either talking to the Police or do nothing....



« Last Edit: 11 October 2008, 21:49:26 by markjay »
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Bandit127

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Re: A moral question.
« Reply #7 on: 11 October 2008, 22:05:52 »

Please people, if we called the police evey time a 16 year old got served in a pub none of us would get nicked for speeding, let alone anything worse.

Give the guy a break. He had a few beers. Failed to get stupid, throw up drunk. Failed to drink-drive his moped home. Was honest with his Dad.

Exemplary behaviour for a 16 year old these days. Exemplary behaviour for a 16 year when I was that age - and also the 'call the police' brigade when they were that age too I suspect.

Get a life people - and let him have his...  :y

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cem_devecioglu

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Re: A moral question.
« Reply #8 on: 11 October 2008, 22:06:04 »

Quote
Drinking can be a very slippery slope, especially for young people. I would keep monitoring his behaviour just to make sure that he keep acting responsibly, as he has done, and if so then I would be happy with that.

As for the Pubs, it would depend to a great extent of the nature of the said establishment,. If it is a small local pub where the publican is behind the bar most of the time, then yes a quiet word would be appropriate. But if it is one of them chain-owned large commercial pubs, then I suspect no-one on-premises would really care, so it’s either talking to the Police or do nothing....




agreed :y
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amigov6

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Re: A moral question.
« Reply #9 on: 11 October 2008, 22:12:10 »

I'd let it go if no harm was done. Does'nt make you an uncaring parent but sometimes you have to let them find out for themselves. We all supped a few @ 16 or younger, i see no need to rock the boat.
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Vamps

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Re: A moral question.
« Reply #10 on: 11 October 2008, 22:12:42 »

Quote
Please people, if we called the police evey time a 16 year old got served in a pub none of us would get nicked for speeding, let alone anything worse.

Give the guy a break. He had a few beers. Failed to get stupid, throw up drunk. Failed to drink-drive his moped home. Was honest with his Dad.

Exemplary behaviour for a 16 year old these days. Exemplary behaviour for a 16 year when I was that age - and also the 'call the police' brigade when they were that age too I suspect.

Get a life people - and let him have his...  :y


I am not worried about him, he is sensible.

So it is OK for pubs to serve kids, well don't complain about gangs of drunken youths then, someone served them.
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Jay w

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Re: A moral question.
« Reply #11 on: 11 October 2008, 22:14:29 »

at 16 i was doing the same sort of thing, we weren't getting drunk but were doing a pint or two on the weekends...........

i know things have changed and we have more of a focus of what can be 'unsocial behaviour' excessive drinking being one of those.

James, my stepson, was drinking in the house at 15/16, he was too baby faced to get served, and there were a few times that he overdid it and ended up with his head down the loo in the middle of the night......

He is now 19 and has a pretty responsible attitude to drink, yes he goes out and yes he has a few, but knows when to call it a day.

Personally i would be having a chat with him, however it does seem that by leaving his bike and getting a lift he is showing some sensibility.....  
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STMO123

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Re: A moral question.
« Reply #12 on: 11 October 2008, 22:19:20 »

I wouldn't worry about going near the pubs in question. There are hundreds of pubs and if the lad wants a drink he will find one somewhere that will serve him. I would talk to him about it, he is the one who will decide whether he walks through the door of the pub in the first place and he will decide how much he is going to drink whilst in there.
Make it clear that there is nothing wrong with a drink now and again and it is natural for him to want to try and 'grow up'.
Tell him you trust him and know that he wont let you down, but at the same time point out how one foolish mistake, ie, getting on his scooter, will stay with him for a very long time.
The lad has not let you down so far, give him some credit.
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albitz

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Re: A moral question.
« Reply #13 on: 11 October 2008, 22:22:11 »

sensible stepson,irresponsible landlord.
considering the drink related problems we see these days,pubs shouldnt be serving 16 year olds imo......I would be tempted to make the call.
A 17 y.o. was drinking in a pub near to where I live about a year ago.
he wasnt quite as sensible and decided he could ride 1 mile home on his scooter.He hit a telegraph pole less than 100 yards from his house and was killed.
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markey mark

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Re: A moral question.
« Reply #14 on: 11 October 2008, 22:22:20 »

he will be fine got a 16 year old lad mesen ! had a few beers with him in cyprus when we were there ! worst thing you can do is make a fuss next time he wont be so forth coming with deatails  :y
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