> 1. Teaching Maths In 1970
> A logger sells a truckload of timber for £100.
> His cost of production is 4/5 of the price.
> What is his profit?
>
> 2. Teaching Maths In 1980
> A logger sells a truckload of timber for £100.
> His cost of production is 80% of the price.
> What is his profit?
>
> 3. Teaching Maths In 1990
> A logger sells a truckload of timber for £100.
> His cost of production is £80.
> How much was his profit?
>
> 4. Teaching Maths In 2000
> A logger sells a truckload of timber for £100.
> His cost of production is £80 and his profit is £20.
> Your assignment: Underline the number 20.
>
> 5. Teaching Maths In 2005
> A logger cuts down a beautiful forest because he is selfish and
> inconsiderate and cares nothing for the habit of animals or the
> preservation of our woodlands.
> Your assignment: Discuss how might the birds and squirrels feel as the
> logger cut down their homes just for a measly profit of £20.
>
>
> 6. Teaching Maths In 2009
> A logger is arrested for trying to cut down a tree in case it may be
> offensive to Muslims or other religious groups not consulted in the
> felling licence. He is also fined a £100 as his chainsaw is in breach of Health &
> Safety legislation as it deemed too dangerous and could cut something. He
> has used the chainsaw for over 20 years without incident however he does
> not have the correct certificate of competence and is therefore considered
> to be a recividest and habitual criminal. His DNA is sampled and his
> details circulated throughout all government agencies. He protests and is
> taken to court and fined another £100 because he is such an easy target.
> When he is released he returns to find Gypsies have cut down half his wood
> to build a camp on his land. He tries to throw them off but is arrested,
> prosecuted for harassing an ethnic minority, imprisoned and fined a
> further £100. While he is in jail the Gypsies cut down the rest of his wood and
> sell it on the black market for £100 cash. They also have a leaving BBQ
> of squirrel and pheasant and depart leaving behind several tonnes of rubbish
> and asbestos sheeting. The forester on release is warned that failure to
> clear the fly tipped rubbish immediately at his own cost is an offence. He
> complains and is arrested for environmental pollution, breach of the peace
> and invoiced £12000 plus VAT for safe disposal costs by a regulated
> government contractor.
>
>
> Your assignment: How many times is the logger going to have to be
> arrested and fined before he realises that he is never going to make £20 profit by
> hard work, give up, sign onto the dole and live off the state for the rest
> of his life?
>
>
> 7. Teaching Maths In 2010
> A logger doesn’t sell a lorry load of timber because he can’t get a loan
> to buy a new lorry because his bank has spent all his and their money on a
> derivative of securitised debt related to sub- prime mortgages in Alabama
> and lost the lot with only some government money left to pay a few million
> pound bonuses to their senior directors and the traders who made the
> biggest losses.
>
> The logger stuggles to pay the £1200 road tax on his old lorry however,
> as it was built in the 1970s it no longer meets the emissions regulations
> and he is forced to scrap it.
>
> Some Bulgarian loggers buy the lorry from the scrap merchant and put it
> back on the road. They undercut everyone on price for haulage and send
> their cash back home, while claiming unemployment for themselves and their
> relatives. If questioned they speak no English and it is easier to deport
> them at the governments expense. Following their holiday back home they
> return to the UK with different names and fresh girls and start again. The
> logger protests, is accused of being a bigoted racist and as his name is
> on the side of his old lorry he is forced to pay £1500 registration fees as a gang
> master.
>
>
> The Government borrows more money to pay more to the bankers as bonus's
> are not cheap. The parliamentarians feel they are missing out and claim the
> difference on expenses and allowances.
>
>
> You do the maths.
>
>
> 8. Teaching Maths 2017
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Topic: Long Maths Joke (Read 560 times)