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[bertiecbx550]

I once got sent to do a tv retune when i worked at comet...When i got there i asked what exactly was the problem...Only to be told the sun shines on the tv in the afternoon and i cant see the screen!!! and could i move the tv 10" to the right so it stops the problem...I later found out the customer was a deputy store manager at the tamworth comet store......

[redelitev6]

  and you wonder why we need polish workers!!

[dbug]

When I had my IT business an elderly lady came in with a PC that wouldn't boot for repair.  She explained that as it was only a few months old she expected it to be repaired foc under warranty.  I asked her where she had bought it as it obviously wasn't one of my builds (cheapo case etc!!) - PC World she said.  When I suggested she take it back to them for warranty repair she got quite stroppy and abusive insisting that as it was "new" I should repair it foc.  She was politely told to  go forth    - True story - Northants

[I_want_an_Omega]

Some years ago I called our team PA and asked her to book me a flight to Genoa. "That's nice, I really like Italy", she said. When the tickets were delivered they were for Geneva!

[Squealey]

About 8 years ago my company sold a good customer of ours an ex demo shrink wrap machine, £40,000 worth of equipment. We always asked that a customer gets the essentials to the machine (3 phase power, air etc etc) then leave it well alone.
Well this customer is like a kid with a new toy and can't wait to switch it on. He wires it up and BANG!!!! Now you or I might be put off by this but after quickly switching it off he switches it back on, god knows what he thought might happen, but, you've guessed it, BANG!!!!
After a little bit of BS on his side (I never touched it, I never switched it on etc etc) we were obviously able to prove as an ex demo it was working 24 hours before it was delivered.
Turns out he had lived up a neutral. My machines don't much like 240v down there and it turns out he had blown up 2 Lenze motor controllers. It would have been one, but he had switched it on again hadn't he. Cost for new one (programmed direct from machinery manufacturer, £850 each)
Oh well, we all learn by our mistakes, or so you would think.
Luckily he has decided to stay with me after I was made redundent in April and requested that I go in last Thursday and install a second hand machine he had picked up. I couldn't believe it when I arrived, he had done exactley the same thing and blown up 2 motor controllers, again!!!!!
As I work for myself now I decided to take a look inside (wasn't allowed to do that at my last company, not as much profit). Found a varistor in each one blown to kingdom come.
Found the varistor at RS, 47p each, soldered them onto the PCB and job done. Saved him £1600+!!!
Although I never made as much cash out of that, the  great feeling I got from making something work with a little bit of savvy and the appriciation I got from the customer was fantastic!
End of the day, he's a great customer, one of the nicest blokes I know, and I need to keep hold of them ones!!!!

[Amigo]

Typical "rest head in palm of hand & sigh" situation. Certainly makes one wonder.
     All good but i especially like no.5!!!!

[Gaffers]

Another heating "Engineer" story....
Mother-in-laws heating had its annual service by Worcester (or whatever they call themselves now), next morning there was no heat so another "Engineer" turns up and diagnoses low system pressure and re-pressurises it.
Next morning, no heat. New " Engineer" turns up and finds no pressure again so spends 3 hours looking for a leak, cant find one so re-pressurises it and leaves.
Next morning, no heat. Supervisor turns up, sees there is no pressure and says 'expansion vessel' which is changed lated that day.
Next morning, no heat. Supervisor plus one turns up, no pressure again and changes the heat exchanger.
Next morning, no heat. "Engineer" turns up and replaces the pump???
Next morning, no heat. I get up early and drive 35miles to MiL and simply look at the boiler etc. There is water on the ground under the pressure relief pipe. Re-pressurise the system and it lights up, second later a trickle of water appears at the pressure relief pipe.
Part of the service requires the pressure relief valve to be tested, most experienced plumbers / technicians know that they often leak once the valve lifts off its seat so they either fit a new seal or replace the valve as part of the service.
New valve clipped in and system holds pressure.
Worcester supervisor turns up and starts ranting about how I wasnt allowed to touch the boiler (combustion chamber etc not opened) then tried to say it voided her maitenance contract terms so I offered to write to his Director and appologise but also explain that an 87 year old woman was left without heating or hot water for 8 days because 4 different "Engineers" and one Supervisor couldnt follow a simple fault finding process. He backed off a bit then. (think I will write anyway).
MiL has a new heat exchanger, pump, fill valve, double check valve, pressure flush? (Why??) fresh inhibitor and an overhauled pressure relief valve with new O rings.
Next morning, lovely and warm, and the next, and the next, until....
Next morning, no hot water. Flow switch has packed up. Man is on his way.
here we go again.

Dont get me started on heating engineers 

[Marks DTM Calib]

They are not engineers....many seem to show a compitence level barely above that that of a toddler!

[Omegadoha, Desert Member]

JC head in hands moments. :-?

[cruisetopoland]

This is embarrassing, but true...

I once spent two hours furiously driving in Italy trying to find Florence after my co-pilot decided it would be a good idea to see the sights and try Florentine steak.

After 50 miles of frustration, I worked out that Florence is indeed Firenze, hence the lack of signs to Florence 

Never lived this down 

[Debs.]

This is embarrassing, but true...

I once spent two hours furiously driving in Italy trying to find Florence after my co-pilot decided it would be a good idea to see the sights and try Florentine steak.

After 50 miles of frustration, I worked out that Florence is indeed Firenze, hence the lack of signs to Florence 

Never lived this down 

If not meant in the aviation sense (i.e: co-pilot); that`s only slightly less worrying/amusing!

[cruisetopoland]

This is embarrassing, but true...

I once spent two hours furiously driving in Italy trying to find Florence after my co-pilot decided it would be a good idea to see the sights and try Florentine steak.

After 50 miles of frustration, I worked out that Florence is indeed Firenze, hence the lack of signs to Florence 

Never lived this down 

If not meant in the aviation sense (i.e: co-pilot); that`s only slightly less worrying/amusing!

The bizarre thing is though, that the co-pilot was ITALIAN

[Entwood]

This is embarrassing, but true...

I once spent two hours furiously driving in Italy trying to find Florence after my co-pilot decided it would be a good idea to see the sights and try Florentine steak.

After 50 miles of frustration, I worked out that Florence is indeed Firenze, hence the lack of signs to Florence 

Never lived this down 

If not meant in the aviation sense (i.e: co-pilot); that`s only slightly less worrying/amusing!

The bizarre thing is though, that the co-pilot was ITALIAN

Explains everything .. they NEVER read road signs of any description

[cruisetopoland]

This is embarrassing, but true...

I once spent two hours furiously driving in Italy trying to find Florence after my co-pilot decided it would be a good idea to see the sights and try Florentine steak.

After 50 miles of frustration, I worked out that Florence is indeed Firenze, hence the lack of signs to Florence 

Never lived this down 

If not meant in the aviation sense (i.e: co-pilot); that`s only slightly less worrying/amusing!

The bizarre thing is though, that the co-pilot was ITALIAN

Explains everything .. they NEVER read road signs of any description

One city we visited had a nightmare island with angry traffic-surprising that, as 5 of the 6 exits were marked "centro".

How?  WTF?  Considering Romans made good roads, Italian road signs are hopeless 

[cem_devecioglu]

This is embarrassing, but true...

I once spent two hours furiously driving in Italy trying to find Florence after my co-pilot decided it would be a good idea to see the sights and try Florentine steak.

After 50 miles of frustration, I worked out that Florence is indeed Firenze, hence the lack of signs to Florence 

Never lived this down 

If not meant in the aviation sense (i.e: co-pilot); that`s only slightly less worrying/amusing!

The bizarre thing is though, that the co-pilot was ITALIAN

Explains everything .. they NEVER read road signs of any description

story is a bit different here..chances are as follows:

road signs are mostly used as targets for shooting experience

if not, stolen by someone

if not, painted by an unknown artist

if it can survive ,  still nobody reads it