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[zirax]

For background info my dad has been out of work for 10 months.

Ring Ring:-
Dad puts me on speakerphone so my mum can hear as well.
"Just wanted to say congrats on your new job dad!"
"eh? I haven't got a job"
"Yes you have, it's a houseman and you've just saved me £25 on my car insurance"
"I AIN'T A ******* HOUSEMAN, I'M UNEMPLOYED!"
My mum starts wetting herself in the background
"Well, what do you do all day dad? Do you hoover?"
"yep"
"cook?"
"yep"
...........
......
"I AIN'T ONE!"
"What about househusband?" asks my mum
"nah, too expensive, they add £10 to the policy"
At this point my mum is laughing her head off
"I AIN'T....."
"Thanks dad, I'll see you at the weekend"

If you can imagine two hands coming out of the phone, they'd be round my neck He'll come around when it saves him a packet on his policy which is due soon

[Lazydocker]

Exactly... Instead of unemployed be a Houseman/House Husband/Homemaker and you wont get stung as much