As it seems we are coming to the end of Gordon and his Labour party running the UK, here are a few ...... Jokes.
Metaphorically, the \'Midas touch\' is defined as someone of good fortune, for whom everything they touch \"turns to gold\".
Gordon Brown is said to have the \'Andrex touch.\'
I see the Police have just foiled a terrorist plot to blow up the Prime Minister, Gordon Brown.
Haven't they got anything better to do?
I was stopped on the street by a woman doing a survey today. She asked me what I thought Gordon Brown could do for the British people.
Apparently "die" wasn't an option.
While stitching up the hand of a 75 year old Devon farmer, who cut it on a gate while working cattle, the rural doctor struck up a conversation with the old man. Eventually the topic got around to Gordon Brown and his appointment as Prime Minister.
“Well, you know,” drawled the old farmer, “this Brown fellow is what they call a fencepost tortoise.”
Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a fencepost tortoise was.
The old farmer said, “When you’re driving along a country road and you come across a fence post with a tortoise balanced on top, that’s called a fencepost tortoise.”
The old farmer saw a puzzled look on the doctor’s face, so he continued to explain, “You know he didn’t get up there by himself, he definitely doesn’t belong up there, he doesn’t know what to do while he is up there, and you just have to wonder what kind of idiot put him up there in the first place.”
Gordon Brown says he wants kids to stay at school until they're 18.
That's just not going to work in the modern world is it? Who's going to pick their kids up from primary school?
What's the difference between Gordon Brown and Robert Mugabe?
One's a fat idiot who lost control of the country and is wrecking its economy. The other is Robert Mugabe.
1. Open a 'new file' in your computer.
2. Name it, 'Gordon Brown.'
3. Send it to the 'trash.'
4. Empty the 'trash.'
5. Your computer will ask you, 'Do you really want to get rid of 'Gordon Brown?'
6. Firmly, Click 'Yes.'
7. Feel better?
An American doctor said, 'Medicine in my country is so advanced, we can take a kidney out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in six weeks'.
A German doctor said, 'That's nothing! In Germany, we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in four weeks'.
A Russian doctor said, 'In my country medicine is so advanced, we can take half a heart from one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two weeks'.
The English doctor, not to be outdone, said 'Hah!. We can take two arseholes out of Scotland, put them in 10 & 11 Downing Street and have half the country looking for work within twenty-four hours'.
Whats 12 inches long and hangs in front of an arsehole?
Gordon Brown's tie.
Headline News:
"Gordon Brown: Sarah and I, we're a modern love story".
That's right Gordon... Shrek.
So Gordon Brown has switched from Kit-Kats to bananas
Don't know why, cos soon as the Election is over, he's going to be taking a big f$%^ing break.
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Topic: Gordon Brown (JOKES) (Read 709 times)