At the end of the tax year, the Tax Office sent an inspector to audit the books of a Synagogue.
While he was checking the books he turned to the Rabbi and said, 'I notice you buy a lot of candles. What do you do with the candle drippings?'
Good question,' noted the Rabbi. 'We save them up and send them back to the candle makers, and every now and then they send us a free box of candles.'
'Oh,' replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question had a practical answer.
But on he went, in his obnoxious way: 'What about all these bread-wafer purchases? What do you do with the crumbs?'
'Ah, yes,' replied the Rabbi, realising that the inspector was trying to trap him with an unanswerable question. 'We collect them and send them back to the manufacturers, and every now and then they send us a free box of bread-wafers.'
'I see,' replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he could fluster the know-it-all Rabbi.
'Well, Rabbi,' he went on, 'what do you do with all the leftover foreskins from the circumcisions you perform?'
'Here, too, we do not waste,' answered the Rabbi...'What we do is save all the foreskins and send them to the Tax Office, and about once a year they send us a complete dick.'
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A female CNN journalist heard about a very old Jewish man who had been going to the Western Wall to pray, twice a day, every day, for a long, long time.
So she went to check it out. She went to the Western Wall and there he was, walking slowly up to the holy site.
She watched him pray and after about 45 minutes, when he turned to leave, using a cane and moving very slowly, she approached him for an interview.
‘Pardon me sir, I’m Rebecca Smith from CNN. What’s your name?
‘Morris Fishbien,’ he replied.
‘Sir, how long have you been coming to the Western Wall and praying?’
‘For about 60 years.’
‘60 years! That’s amazing! What do you pray for?’
‘I pray for peace between the Christians, Jews and the Muslims.’
‘I pray for all the wars and all the hatred to stop.’
‘I pray for all our children to grow up safely as responsible adults, and to love their fellow man.’
‘How do you feel after doing this for 60 years?’
‘Like I’m talking to a brick wall!’
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Topic: THE TAXMAN COMETH joke (Read 738 times)