When I was a kid the old man was running a building site in a bit of a down-at-heel part of the town. One day a chap in the block of flats next to it went off his trolley and began hurling abuse from his balcony, throwing stuff off it at people below and eventually clambered over the wall and threatened to leap from his flat. The Police were of course called and began trying to talk him down as the area was sealed off.
As the old man continued working in his portakabin a wooden top came rushing in, his face flush with annoyance.
"Are you in charge here?" he enquired.
"Yes I am," the old man said. "Why?"
"If you don't keep the people on your site under control we will close you down and you'll be under arrest!" the copper said.
Just as the old man was about to start his usual argument with someone in authority on the merits of his allegation, through the now open door he heard the rythmic chant of assorted labourers, chippies and roofers as they stood on the scaffolding round the newly constructed building outside;
"Jump, yer fat b*****d!!!!!!!!!!"
And the motto of the story? Well, if you're thinking about meeting your maker, don't do it in the vicinity of people from Tipton or the Wren's Nest Estate as they have a strange concept of entertainment.
(I should add that the person did not jump and eventually was talked down)