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[Amigo]

It's been a week now & i just don't like driving the truck any more. Although no one was hurt i can't get over the fact i could kill someone so easily, i don't want to be responsible for that. After each day i can't wait to jump out of the poxy thing & glad i hav'nt hurt anyone...i dread getting back in it again. I'm so nervous now i'm more of a risk than before. You see /hear horror stories about trucks hitting cars & killing people. It's really shaken me up & i don't want to do it anymore.
  A mate runs a busy cab firm & i'm tempted to go self employed, yes i have a good accountant & can afford to buy & insure a car, medical /police check etc.

[Lizzie_Zoom]

It's been a week now & i just don't like driving the truck any more. Although no one was hurt i can't get over the fact i could kill someone so easily, i don't want to be responsible for that. After each day i can't wait to jump out of the poxy thing & glad i hav'nt hurt anyone...i dread getting back in it again. I'm so nervous now i'm more of a risk than before. You see /hear horror stories about trucks hitting cars & killing people. It's really shaken me up & i don't want to do it anymore.
  A mate runs a busy cab firm & i'm tempted to go self employed, yes i have a good accountant & can afford to buy & insure a car, medical /police check etc.

I will always advise people Guy to go with the heart, and let the brain work out how

If you feel like that it is for a good reason, so go with the flow

[skyblue]

I inderstand how you are feeling  but if you are too nervous to continue maybe ya gaffer could find you a yard job for a while

[albitz]

Act in haste, regret at your leisure. Iirc Guy you loved your job until now.I think you need a bit more time to put this incident into perspective tbh. Maybe you can learn from it even though iirc it wasnt your fault ?
My advice, for what its worth, is to give it time.

[hotel21]

Had a few driving heart stoppers of various types over the years Guy, so have an inkling of how you feel.

Ultimately, you do what you want to do.  Sometimes it can be over analysed, thinking about the big 'what ifs' but, as you have seen, it was a swap of paint and dents, nothing more.

In some respects, if you look back at your banger days and the knocks and injuries that some caught, would you do it now?  I would bet, possibly not.

New day, new challenges mate....   

 

[Lazydocker]

Guy, don't make any rush decisions... If you let every "What if" play on your mind you wouldn't leave the house

I remember attending the scene of an RTA when doing recovery... Nothing serious but at the front of the queue was my motorbike instructor who gave me a toot and thumbs up. The police officer on the scene asked how I knew him and I told him it was my instructor and I was doing my test next week.

His response was "After the fatal accident you attended yesterday?", which was particularly nasty and is still deeply embedded in my mind.

My response... "But you could say the same about walking after the fatality we attended 3 weeks ago", again a rather nasty pedestrian Vs Rover 800 incident.

You'll still be driving for a living mate... Still have higher than average odds of an incident...

Think long term mate... How many years have you been driving HGVs? And how many times have you had a bump?

[Amigo]

The banger racing was MUCH harder & full on. Difference is we went out looking for it on the track. On the road we all want to avoid it.
  I'm going to work tomorrow & won't make any rash decisions but after all these years i'm uneasy in the truck now. We'll see how it goes but i've never felt like this before, i'm on edge all the time, can't be safe.

[Amigo]

Guy, don't make any rush decisions... If you let every "What if" play on your mind you wouldn't leave the house

I remember attending the scene of an RTA when doing recovery... Nothing serious but at the front of the queue was my motorbike instructor who gave me a toot and thumbs up. The police officer on the scene asked how I knew him and I told him it was my instructor and I was doing my test next week.

His response was "After the fatal accident you attended yesterday?", which was particularly nasty and is still deeply embedded in my mind.

My response... "But you could say the same about walking after the fatality we attended 3 weeks ago", again a rather nasty pedestrian Vs Rover 800 incident.

You'll still be driving for a living mate... Still have higher than average odds of an incident...

Think long term mate... How many years have you been driving HGVs? And how many times have you had a bump?

I see everything you're saying Paul but you attended your accident, regardless of fault i was involved in mine & was close to killing some one hence "doing it" not attending it.
   I don't want to be responsible for that & i don't want to climb in my cab tomorrow.

   I just see it happening again over & over. 

[cem_devecioglu]

amigo, accidents are inevitable either this way or that way.. which one do you prefer to be in when something happens car or truck

[Lazydocker]

Guy, don't make any rush decisions... If you let every "What if" play on your mind you wouldn't leave the house

I remember attending the scene of an RTA when doing recovery... Nothing serious but at the front of the queue was my motorbike instructor who gave me a toot and thumbs up. The police officer on the scene asked how I knew him and I told him it was my instructor and I was doing my test next week.

His response was "After the fatal accident you attended yesterday?", which was particularly nasty and is still deeply embedded in my mind.

My response... "But you could say the same about walking after the fatality we attended 3 weeks ago", again a rather nasty pedestrian Vs Rover 800 incident.

You'll still be driving for a living mate... Still have higher than average odds of an incident...

Think long term mate... How many years have you been driving HGVs? And how many times have you had a bump?

I see everything you're saying Paul but you attended your accident, regardless of fault i was involved in mine & was close to killing some one hence "doing it" not attending it.
   I don't want to be responsible for that & i don't want to climb in my cab tomorrow.

   I just see it happening again over & over. 

Yep... I agree completely Guy. Was just a couple of "What if" moments.

At the end of the day, only you can decide. But I'm sure you'll feel better in time mate.

If you do decide that you've had enough and want to go down the Taxi route, remember that to earn your £450(?)/week you need to earn much more than that by the time you've allowed maintenance/rental/fuel/circuit charges

Got a few mates who do Taxi work and, certainly around here, there just isn't enough work about at the moment

As someone else said... Any chance of the gaffer giving you some yard work/shunting for a week or 2? I know that's probably not easy for a relatively small firm but worth asking? Explain why... You never know I know (from what you've said) that he'd be very sad to see you go

[Omegatoy]

Strangely, Ive had 2 incidents similar to your story, both times it was drivers trying to shoot up the inside to get in front of the slow artic , both were frightening and the damage to the cars was horrendous, thankfully both drivers were ok although not happy when i gave them a verbal for tryng to kill themselves after they had mouthed off at me!!,
HOWEVER it plays on your mind for about ten days or so thenits slowly forgotten till the insurance company bring it all up again!! and then it fades again,
point is both times it made me more aware of the hidden dangers and a far more alert driver, especially when checking mirrors i always check twice now!! on my last assesment the instructor commented on how few drivers do what i do and complimented me afterwards,

If you like I have always driven class1, and always enjoyed the challenge, then give it a while mate use the nerves to make you a better driver, and keep on trucking

[skyblue]

Strangely, Ive had 2 incidents similar to your story, both times it was drivers trying to shoot up the inside to get in front of the slow artic , both were frightening and the damage to the cars was horrendous, thankfully both drivers were ok although not happy when i gave them a verbal for tryng to kill themselves after they had mouthed off at me!!,
HOWEVER it plays on your mind for about ten days or so thenits slowly forgotten till the insurance company bring it all up again!! and then it fades again,
point is both times it made me more aware of the hidden dangers and a far more alert driver, especially when checking mirrors i always check twice now!! on my last assesment the instructor commented on how few drivers do what i do and complimented me afterwards,

If you like I have always driven class1, and always enjoyed the challenge, then give it a while mate use the nerves to make you a better driver, and keep on trucking

Some very sound advice there... dont let one prats actions destroy you mate

[Baron Von Spongebob]

Take a deep breath Guy, have a word with the gaffer, we are in charge of big dangerous vehicles and at risk more than most because of the miles we do but, these things happen, Don't give up on your passion, You will get over it and it will probably take a bit of time.

[TheBoy]

Amigo Guy, you can just as easily kill someone in a minicab. Actually, possibly more likely if the truth be told due to the nature of the beast.

Do what you want to do, but its always struck me that you've always enjoyed what you did.  Hopefully, you've had your only incident now.

[Amigo]

I want to get over it & enjoy the job again. It's only been a few days but i'm so on edge at the moment i feel i'm even more at risk of hurting someone else.
   I hate to admit it but i'm scared of it happening again which makes me more of a liabilty. We'll see.