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[VXL V6]

It takes time, as Omegatoy says, about ten days before all the 'What if's' stop going around in your head. Just the human way of dealing with it i'm afraid. You'll be fine when everything stops going round in your head.

[Lazydocker]

I want to get over it & enjoy the job again. It's only been a few days but i'm so on edge at the moment i feel i'm even more at risk of hurting someone else.
   I hate to admit it but i'm scared of it happening again which makes me more of a liabilty. We'll see.

Is it insensitive if I go for the more forceful route

Don't be so soft you big daft ape  Or I'll set Emma on you

Seriously though Guy, I do understand your doubts but really think you need to look at it from a different perspective...

You've been driving for years and never had such an incident... That is because you are safe and experienced   Step back and put it behind you

Oh... And Emma sends a big hug and chilled wipes to mop your brow

[skyblue]

I want to get over it & enjoy the job again. It's only been a few days but i'm so on edge at the moment i feel i'm even more at risk of hurting someone else.
   I hate to admit it but i'm scared of it happening again which makes me more of a liabilty. We'll see.

There is NO harm in feeling scared mate.... after my accident  I was the same didnt want to drive again but knew I had too. Ask yourself this  Could you have done anything more  to avoid the accident... by the sounds of it no so why keep blameing  yourself for some other prats stupid actions

[albitz]

I think incidents such as this can make you a better driver in the long run. It serves as a reminder not to become complacent, and just how easy it is to have an accident. Hopefully it will soon fade Guy and you can carry on, a better safer driver than you were before.

[CaptainZok]

Reading your original post the copper didn't see you as negligent or he'd have been looking at a due care charge so stop doubting yourself.
As for what if, what if she had used a bit more alertness and not gone up the inside of a trailer which was indicating?

Take it easy and stop beating yourself up about what didn't happen mate.

[hoofing it]

The main thing is knowone was killed but you had a bad scare most of us hgv drivers have had them.
DON'T let the what if's ruin your love for the job your doing

[Entwood]

What you are feeling is totally normal, it is a typical reaction to a highly stressful occurance.

What matters now is how it is dealt with.

NOTE I did NOT say "how you deal with it".

Speak to your boss, your union, AND YOUR GP. Stress, and your reaction to it is a serious matter. You might need a short period off work, counselling may help .. I don't know because I don't know you, and I don't know your circumstances... but you do need the support of a trained professional .... not a bunch of well wishing amateurs.

What I do know is, worrying about it and trying to sort it on your own, or taking the macho "learn to live with it" line are both TOTALLY WRONG.

In my time in the military I saw far too many "macho" types end up in deep s**t, with all sorts of problems, because they refused to seek help. The earlier the problem is faced .. the easier the recovery... and your boss, as your "supervisor" has a major role to play.

[Lazydocker]

What you are feeling is totally normal, it is a typical reaction to a highly stressful occurance.

What matters now is how it is dealt with.

NOTE I did NOT say "how you deal with it".

Speak to your boss, your union, AND YOUR GP. Stress, and your reaction to it is a serious matter. You might need a short period off work, counselling may help .. I don't know because I don't know you, and I don't know your circumstances... but you do need the support of a trained professional .... not a bunch of well wishing amateurs.

What I do know is, worrying about it and trying to sort it on your own, or taking the macho "learn to live with it" line are both TOTALLY WRONG.

In my time in the military I saw far too many "macho" types end up in deep s**t, with all sorts of problems, because they refused to seek help. The earlier the problem is faced .. the easier the recovery... and your boss, as your "supervisor" has a major role to play.

Very true E! 

[Amigo]

You lot are great & thanks. Early start & finish but easy day tomorrow, regular run. Then i've got the weekend away from the truck.
   I know you're all talking sense but things don't usually phase me so i'm not used to feeling like this.

 Get tomorrow out of the way & i'll see how i feel next week.

[Del Boy]

What you are feeling is totally normal, it is a typical reaction to a highly stressful occurance.

What matters now is how it is dealt with.

NOTE I did NOT say "how you deal with it".

Speak to your boss, your union, AND YOUR GP. Stress, and your reaction to it is a serious matter. You might need a short period off work, counselling may help .. I don't know because I don't know you, and I don't know your circumstances... but you do need the support of a trained professional .... not a bunch of well wishing amateurs.

What I do know is, worrying about it and trying to sort it on your own, or taking the macho "learn to live with it" line are both TOTALLY WRONG.

In my time in the military I saw far too many "macho" types end up in deep s**t, with all sorts of problems, because they refused to seek help. The earlier the problem is faced .. the easier the recovery... and your boss, as your "supervisor" has a major role to play.

What absolute sense you speak 

[Lazydocker]

You lot are great & thanks. Early start & finish but easy day tomorrow, regular run. Then i've got the weekend away from the truck.
   I know you're all talking sense but things don't usually phase me so i'm not used to feeling like this.

 Get tomorrow out of the way & i'll see how i feel next week.

You'll be OK Guy

But, like Entwood says, don't be afraid to ask for professional help

[Vamps]

Guy, just drive thinking every other car on the road is a MKI Cortina, your driving will never have been better.....

[Kevin Wood]

Recent events on the road have left me feeling similar, Guy, so I can empathise to a certain extent.

Smaller, less dangerous chunks of metal involved, admittedly, but, nonetheless, it's easy to lose your confidence even if you know deep down that you were in the right and did all you could.

I would say don't do anything hasty and throw away a good career. Find a way to get through the interim period when all the reminders will be there, to a time when you can put this behind you. Give 100% to your driving and pat yourself on the back every time you see a dangerous situation you've avoided. Don't give up. If you do, it'll probably be one more incompetent foreign driver taking your place.

Kevin

[Amigo]

Reading your original post the copper didn't see you as negligent or he'd have been looking at a due care charge so stop doubting yourself.
As for what if, what if she had used a bit more alertness and not gone up the inside of a trailer which was indicating?

Take it easy and stop beating yourself up about what didn't happen mate.

You & Carol have ridden shotgun with me on a pretty challenging bit of road in an old truck with a real gearbox at full weight so you've seen me drive a wagon but regardless of who'se fault it is i don't want blood on my hands. I'm sure i'll get over it, besides Kim does the best burger!

[TheBoy]

"learn to live with it" line are

Ah, you mean the TheBoy method of dealing with stress/family&friends funerals/illness/bad things etc