So what have you done to your car today?

[Doctor Gollum]

Mark will have it rebuilt before lunch

[TheBoy]

Towed the neighbours Corsa D 1.0 back from a rip off RAC approved outfit.

They charged 78 quid and diagnosed timing chain had snapped.

Pulled the rocker cover and the chain is fine, however a lifter has failed, rocker has punched a hole in the cylinder head, fragments have jammed the exhaust cam, and the chain sprocket bolt has sheered.

There is no oil on the dipstick at all

Not the same neighbour who's car we retrieved when her daughter parked on top of a wall?

[Viral_Jim]

Mark will have it rebuilt before lunch

You're assuming he doesn't have a spare engine stashed in the shed 

[ronnyd]

Towed the neighbours Corsa D 1.0 back from a rip off RAC approved outfit.

They charged 78 quid and diagnosed timing chain had snapped.

Pulled the rocker cover and the chain is fine, however a lifter has failed, rocker has punched a hole in the cylinder head, fragments have jammed the exhaust cam, and the chain sprocket bolt has sheered.

There is no oil on the dipstick at all

Was that the cause of the failure.. or... the aftermath. 

[Marks DTM Calib]

Towed the neighbours Corsa D 1.0 back from a rip off RAC approved outfit.

They charged 78 quid and diagnosed timing chain had snapped.

Pulled the rocker cover and the chain is fine, however a lifter has failed, rocker has punched a hole in the cylinder head, fragments have jammed the exhaust cam, and the chain sprocket bolt has sheered.

There is no oil on the dipstick at all

Not the same neighbour who's car we retrieved when her daughter parked on top of a wall?

It is, all be it this is the gay sons partner (or what ever you call them these days).

[Marks DTM Calib]

Towed the neighbours Corsa D 1.0 back from a rip off RAC approved outfit.

They charged 78 quid and diagnosed timing chain had snapped.

Pulled the rocker cover and the chain is fine, however a lifter has failed, rocker has punched a hole in the cylinder head, fragments have jammed the exhaust cam, and the chain sprocket bolt has sheered.

There is no oil on the dipstick at all

Was that the cause of the failure.. or... the aftermath. 

I would guess cause, its recently been serviced by a 'trusted' garage and the filler cap has one of the locking tabs broken and was a loose fit, loads of oil down the side of the block on no 3 cylinder.

When these run low on oil the followers pump down, release the rocker and it makes its way around the cam casing (or through it in this case)

I suspect the rocker has then locked the cam, sheared the cam shaft to sprocket bolt and the valves then mated with the pistons

[Marks DTM Calib]

Mark will have it rebuilt before lunch

You're assuming he doesn't have a spare engine stashed in the shed 

Sadly its the later A10XEP so harder to get 

[TheBoy]

Well it will be an expensive lesson for the <insert current politically correct term>, not to regularly check oil.  Mind you, wouldnt the red pressure light have come on before the engine fully let go?

[ronnyd]

Well it will be an expensive lesson for the <insert current politically correct term>, not to regularly check oil.  Mind you, wouldnt the red pressure light have come on before the engine fully let go?

Some people do like a pretty dashboard. 

[TheBoy]

Well it will be an expensive lesson for the <insert current politically correct term>, not to regularly check oil.  Mind you, wouldnt the red pressure light have come on before the engine fully let go?

Some people do like a pretty dashboard. 

I own a Jaguar. I'm used to it lit up like a Christmas Tree*



(*before I changed the battery a couple of years back)

[VXL V6]

Well it will be an expensive lesson for the <insert current politically correct term>, not to regularly check oil.  Mind you, wouldnt the red pressure light have come on before the engine fully let go?

If it's anything like the pressure sensor on the 1.2's they tend to fail regularly, often when you pull the electrical connector off the oil starts to drip out!

[speedy_ns]

I changed glow plugs on my 2.5DTI. 3 were dead, other 3 were half dead 
Somehow I managed do pool out tiny brake vacuum hose in the process, which almost resulted with close encounter with city bus
I also adjusted drivers door handle (plastic screw adjuster inside) which din't open the door always.

[TheBoy]

I changed glow plugs on my 2.5DTI. 3 were dead, other 3 were half dead 
Somehow I managed do pool out tiny brake vacuum hose in the process, which almost resulted with close encounter with city bus
I also adjusted drivers door handle (plastic screw adjuster inside) which din't open the door always.

My old 2.5TD (the earlier variant of the DTI that we didn't get in the UK) had 4 knackered glow plugs, god knows how it started.  Still, I timed it, it took 55mins to replace all 6 one lunch hour at work

[Migv6 le Frog Fan]

Yeah, but you were a lot younger then. 

[Nick W]

Well it will be an expensive lesson for the <insert current politically correct term>, not to regularly check oil.  Mind you, wouldnt the red pressure light have come on before the engine fully let go?

If it's anything like the pressure sensor on the 1.2's they tend to fail regularly, often when you pull the electrical connector off the oil starts to drip out!

It's the same sensor! Although it doesn't fail quite so badly or so often.