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[STMO123]

...has just stripped off in front of me and said "What turns you on more love, my pretty face or my sexy body?"


I replied " Your f*ckin sense of humour dear"

[Elite Pete]

 

I take it theres not much chance of her reading this Steve.

[maria]

...has just stripped off in front of me and said "What turns you on more love, my pretty face or my sexy body?"


I replied " Your f*ckin sense of humour dear"

Nice one, but you should of been a man and said your body

[Andy B]

...has just stripped off in front of me and said "What turns you on more love, my pretty face or my sexy body?"


I replied " Your f*ckin sense of humour dear"

I thought that you were about to quote a Les Dawson joke!      

[miggy]

...has just stripped off in front of me and said "What turns you on more love, my pretty face or my sexy body?"


I replied " Your f*ckin sense of humour dear"

LMAO  

[STMO123]

I take it theres not much chance of her reading this Steve.

If we think back to my previous anecdotes Pete,  I really hope not

[A380 Elite]

Just think you get an extra hour tonight to do what you want.

[STMO123]

Just think you get an extra hour tonight to do what you want.

DONT! please........dont.

[Elite Pete]

My wife and I were lying in bed the other day. My hands were slowly finding their way across her body. I whispered, "I'm gonna make you the happiest woman in the world." She whispered back, "I'll miss you."
 

[STMO123]

My wife and I were lying in bed the other day. My hands were slowly finding their way across her body. I whispered, "I'm gonna make you the happiest woman in the world." She whispered back, "I'll miss you."
 

 

Mine said to me "You can tie me up and do anything you like"

So I tied her to the bed and f*cked off for a pint.

[amigov6]

I take it theres not much chance of her reading this Steve.

If we think back to my previous anecdotes Pete,  I really hope not

For your sake i sincerely hope not.
     P.S I ca'nt find a scared smilie cos if she reads that you should be!
        

[CaptainZok]

I take it theres not much chance of her reading this Steve.

If we think back to my previous anecdotes Pete,  I really hope not

For your sake i sincerely hope not.
     P.S I ca'nt find a scared smilie cos if she reads that you should be!
        

It'll be next to the sleeping on the couch all week smilie.

[Baron Von Spongebob]

PMSL

[STMO123]

PMSL

Who woke you up?

[Elite Pete]

Horny wife
A lady who had been married for several years was growing more and more frustrated at her husband's lack of interest in sex.

She wondered about ways to add some pizzazz to their sexual relationship, and finally decided to purchase some crotchless underwear she had seen in a Lingerie shop.

One evening when she was feeling particularly desirous, and he was, as usual, watching television, she took a shower, freshened up, and donned the crotchless undies and a slinky negligee. She then strolled between her husband and the television, and suggestively tossed one leg up on his chair arm.

"Want some of this?" she purred.

"Are you kidding?" he replied. "Look what it did to your underwear!"