Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Tony H]

James, been thinking about this and the situation last night.

As a support to the young lady i would drop the manager of the petrol station a letter, my reason for doing this is it will provide balance should the t**t decide to do the same, and from experience if they are prepared to scream and shout then they are also prepared to write and complain

I wouldn't worry too much about that James. If the stations security is up to the mark the whole incident will have been captured and recorded on cctv. As for stepping in well done, There are to many people nowadays prepared to just sit back and allow thing like that to happen

[Kevin Wood]

I think writing to the garage is a good idea. If the chap decides to write a letter the backup the cashier would get if there were already a letter from you supporting her would probably mean more to her than your intervention on the day. After all, she probably doesn't have the best job security anyway in that sort of position.

Could make the difference between her "Pi$$ing off a customer" and her "Successfully dealing with an awkward git" in her boss' eyes.

Kevin

[JamesV6CDX]

Well actually James threatening to knock some guys teeth out is hardly the result of being brought of decently.

That's a very short sighted comment and doesn't incorporate the circumstances..

It is in my book, an acceptable thing to do, to have a man-to-man intervention if someone is being abusive to young women, which is something I cannot stand and was always taught is wrong.

Please note, before I made this comment I wrote "things became a little confrontational" - I had made every effort to talk reason with him first. It was only when HE became agressive I made this comment.

you have threatened someone with violence

Not before he did...

...your lucky he didn't call the police

I wish he did! I would have had a field day telling them about all his racist comments towards the cashier! I had plenty of witnesses to the situation (people with me + staff) and would have had no problems justifying any of my actions. Police are taught to use discretion, and I'm sure given the circumstances they wouldn't take a dim view of someone helping out a victim of racial abuse.

or even worse turn around and do some serious damage to you.

No fear of this. If I wasn't confident of my own abilities, I wouldn't have intervened in the first place.

[motmann]

well done james, i agree with miggy on this one, but , like you did in the situation you found yourself in last month sometimes you have do what you have to do .......do i feel a poll coming on guys? did james do the "right" thing?

[JamesV6CDX]

did james do the "right" thing?

That is purely a matter of discretion, I dont think a poll is really appropriate. Opinions will naturally differ.

But put in the same situation - I would do the same again... and I wouldn't handle it much differently.

I ALWAYS talk politely, and avoid trouble, but as the saying goes, sometimes you must fight fire with fire...

[JamesV6CDX]

PS -

Speaking of dishing out slaps... who's been playing with the title of this thread?  

 

[miggy]

did james do the "right" thing?

That is purely a matter of discretion, I dont think a poll is really appropriate. Opinions will naturally differ.

But put in the same situation - I would do the same again... and I wouldn't handle it much differently.

I ALWAYS talk politely, and avoid trouble, but as the saying goes, sometimes you must fight fire with fire...

Or P"ss on it.............

[eliterob]

well james must say you didnt strike me as the sort to stand up like that (granted only met you for 10 mins lol) but fair play fella.
must say i would have done the same in that situation

[JamesV6CDX]

well james must say you didnt strike me as the sort to stand up like that

I'm not... very very rare for me to loose my temper. I'm usually the most quiet and placid guy out there.

Sometimes though, with scourge like that.. the worm turns

[stuart30]

Well actually James threatening to knock some guys teeth out is hardly the result of being brought of decently.

That's a very short sighted comment and doesn't incorporate the circumstances..

It is in my book, an acceptable thing to do, to have a man-to-man intervention if someone is being abusive to young women, which is something I cannot stand and was always taught is wrong.

Please note, before I made this comment I wrote "things became a little confrontational" - I had made every effort to talk reason with him first. It was only when HE became agressive I made this comment.

you have threatened someone with violence

Not before he did...

...your lucky he didn't call the police

I wish he did! I would have had a field day telling them about all his racist comments towards the cashier! I had plenty of witnesses to the situation (people with me + staff) and would have had no problems justifying any of my actions. Police are taught to use discretion, and I'm sure given the circumstances they wouldn't take a dim view of someone helping out a victim of racial abuse.

or even worse turn around and do some serious damage to you.

No fear of this. If I wasn't confident of my own abilities, I wouldn't have intervened in the first place.

James how is that a short sighted comment.... :-?

You threaten the bloke so you cant really say thats the out come of being brought up decently,if you had asked him to refrain from being abusive and if he didnt you would inform the authorities then too me that would have shown more class than offering to be a DIY dentist.

Regards being confident in your own abilities let me tell you straight james,theres always some bloke who is either bigger nastier or just plain loopy,regardless if you 5.ft or 6.6ft and built like a brick out house....ive seen a college of mine who made my 6.2ft 20 stone size  look like a size 00 compared too him and ive seen him floored by some mental case,what im getting at is no matter how well you feel you can defend your self there's always one person who will be able to attack that little bit better.

Whilst what you did was admirable i feel you was lucky too have walked away from what could have turned very nasty and quite possibly very costly by simply trying to do the right thing.

[JamesV6CDX]

if you had asked him to refrain from being abusive and if he didnt you would inform the authorities then too me that would have shown more class than offering to be a DIY dentist.

stu, point taken mate, but I DID take this approch, and tried to carry on that way, until HE became out of hand towards me

I appreciate your point about the dangers. But.. I guess I was just prepared to defend the poor girl on the recieving end of his abuse

[miggy]

Well actually James threatening to knock some guys teeth out is hardly the result of being brought of decently.

That's a very short sighted comment and doesn't incorporate the circumstances..

It is in my book, an acceptable thing to do, to have a man-to-man intervention if someone is being abusive to young women, which is something I cannot stand and was always taught is wrong.

Please note, before I made this comment I wrote "things became a little confrontational" - I had made every effort to talk reason with him first. It was only when HE became agressive I made this comment.

you have threatened someone with violence

Not before he did...

...your lucky he didn't call the police

I wish he did! I would have had a field day telling them about all his racist comments towards the cashier! I had plenty of witnesses to the situation (people with me + staff) and would have had no problems justifying any of my actions. Police are taught to use discretion, and I'm sure given the circumstances they wouldn't take a dim view of someone helping out a victim of racial abuse.

or even worse turn around and do some serious damage to you.

No fear of this. If I wasn't confident of my own abilities, I wouldn't have intervened in the first place.

James how is that a short sighted comment.... :-?

You threaten the bloke so you cant really say thats the out come of being brought up decently,if you had asked him to refrain from being abusive and if he didnt you would inform the authorities then too me that would have shown more class than offering to be a DIY dentist.

Regards being confident in your own abilities let me tell you straight james,theres always some bloke who is either bigger nastier or just plain loopy,regardless if you 5.ft or 6.6ft and built like a brick out house....ive seen a college of mine who made my 6.2ft 20 stone size  look like a size 00 compared too him and ive seen him floored by some mental case,what im getting at is no matter how well you feel you can defend your self there's always one person who will be able to attack that little bit better.

Whilst what you did was admirable i feel you was lucky too have walked away from what could have turned very nasty and quite possibly very costly by simply trying to do the right thing.

Unfortunatly in this day and age that would not work either and that could have also caused a reaction from the fella.

James did right..he stood up for what he belived in and you cannot knock anyone for that.....I think when he said he was brought up decently, he was most likely refering to standing up for himself and helping others when they are in difficulty, knowing right from wrong and treating people with respect. It seems this fells only knew one language.......shut up or put up.

I still say.........well done James.

 

[cem_devecioglu]

In my opinion James do the right thing..

There are times in everbodys life that you regret after if you dont take the action at the necessary moment..

And there are times you cant accept the situation as it is..

[dippydave]

I am also torn by your actions James. I fully applaud you for reprimanding the loud-mouthed oaf. Especially with others there to back you up if needed.

However after being head-butted in a chip shop after telling a chap to eat his chips in peace and leave my friends alone, I'm not sure about intervention! Maybe if i'd have been more aggressive then he would have backed off and walked away. For my quietness I got threatened, hit, and a response by the police of "there was no cctv footage and nothing from the witnesses" - my letter of complaint went in yesterday stating that the manager had the tape, and there were 7witnesses so do something!

back to the petrol station, I think bullies need to be straightened out at all levels, from the classroom to the street to the office and small contributions like yours James might just help.

Especially if you can 'take care of yourself' if absolutely needed!

[JamesV6CDX]

Looking back on reflection, you would always do things a little differently.

I regret lots of things.... but I don't regret this

I was also once hit in the face by a drunk with no warning or provocation, and nothing came of it. I had a letter from the courts to say if I didn't reply, the offence would be "taken into consideration" with several simelar ones.

They should have thrown the book at him...