How do i go about updating software.....could anyone kindly direct me please.....?
I wouldn't change anything until the fault is fixed. A firmware update won't achieve that and it could introduce another variable that we don't need at this stage.
First step is always to check level and condition of fluid. Drain some out and see what colour it is. Likely to be brown and clear if it hasn't been changed recently. If it's black, opaque or has bits in it, then a faulty gearbox is likely. If not, top up with fluid (with the engine running) and see if that helps.
Also, run the selector lever through each position and check that the yellow LEDs beside the selector follow each position accurately without flickering.
Does it ever go into limp home (stuck in 3rd gear) or display a gearbox fault in the MID?
Also, worth checking the engine for fault codes as this is a 2.2. Failed cam sensor can often send the gearbox into a tizz.
Does it start easily or need a bit more cranking than usual?
Has the engine management light been coming on at all?