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[I_want_an_Omega]

After 30 years my Mrs has finally found a way of stopping my snoring .............

It's actually quite simple and seems to work ..............

If I'm snoring then she reaches out and strokes the uppermost side of my face - just firmly enough to "almost" wake me. This usually has the effect as I then wriggle around, move and stop snoring - for a while anyway.

Plan B is to pinch & hold my nose closed - making sure she can get out of the way as I then thrash around for a while.

The interesting thing is that I have no recollection of her activity in the morning.

HTH

[cem_devecioglu]

After 30 years my Mrs has finally found a way of stopping my snoring .............

It's actually quite simple and seems to work ..............

If I'm snoring then she reaches out and strokes the uppermost side of my face - just firmly enough to "almost" wake me. This usually has the effect as I then wriggle around, move and stop snoring - for a while anyway.

Plan B is to pinch & hold my nose closed - making sure she can get out of the way as I then thrash around for a while.

The interesting thing is that I have no recollection of her activity in the morning.

HTH

 
 

[redelitev6]

  My snoring causes serious grief between me and the Mrs, been to the doc's about it and all he could say was lose some weight and that might help, seems to be the cure all for everything !
 

[omega3000]

After 30 years my Mrs has finally found a way of stopping my snoring .............

It's actually quite simple and seems to work ..............

If I'm snoring then she reaches out and strokes the uppermost side of my face - just firmly enough to "almost" wake me. This usually has the effect as I then wriggle around, move and stop snoring - for a while anyway.

Plan B is to pinch & hold my nose closed - making sure she can get out of the way as I then thrash around for a while.

The interesting thing is that I have no recollection of her activity in the morning.

HTH

 

A right hook like prince naseem would be on its way without you realising 

[Murph]

My snoring causes serious grief between me and the Mrs, been to the doc's about it and all he could say was lose some weight and that might help, seems to be the cure all for everything !

A very familiar story!

I got down to 12st. a couple of years ago and still no difference,  but now that I'm back to nigh on 15st. all that seems to be irrelevant and the snoring is down to my weight again.

[dad1uk]

If you want to hear proper snoring then go for a walk round the campsite at an OOF meet on a Sunday morning - you can feel the ground tremble

[omega3000]

If you want to hear proper snoring then go for a walk round the campsite at an OOF meet on a Sunday morning - you can feel the ground tremble

 

But that would be self inflicted snoring with too much cider       
                                                                           

[paul.lovejoy]

After 30 years my Mrs has finally found a way of stopping my snoring .............

It's actually quite simple and seems to work ..............

If I'm snoring then she reaches out and strokes the uppermost side of my face - just firmly enough to "almost" wake me. This usually has the effect as I then wriggle around, move and stop snoring - for a while anyway.

Plan B is to pinch & hold my nose closed - making sure she can get out of the way as I then thrash around for a while.

The interesting thing is that I have no recollection of her activity in the morning.HTH

i am like that with sex now

[hercules]

Farting is my forte.

oh aye,when your laying on your side with your butt facing the missus and as you relax them big long loud belly farts 

[omegod]

I thought I was getting sick as I was finding bald patches in my pubes, turned out SWMBO had found her own way of stopping me snoring by ripping them out 

[pirate]

my missis is terrible i have to chuck her out wakes the whole house up,its her in the spare room ,how about that i dont make a murmer ,militry training dont make a sound like a bloody ninja

[SIR Philbutt]

Swmbo went to doctors to get sleeping pills as the snoring was disturbing her

He advised her that pills where not the answer to this problem

When she asked what she could do he suggested tying something around the offenders testicles

Couple of night's later I had been on a night out and "fell" into bed and was snoring in seconds

She got up and went to find something to use. Found some blue ribbon in the sewing box and promptly applied it to my jewels   

Instantly the snoring stopped 

Few minutes later the dog started snoring as well  so back she went and found some red ribbon and applied that to his 

Silence was achieved. 

Early in the morning I wake up and nip to the loo for a pee and notice the ribbon, remove and back to bed

On the way back I notice the dog "splayed" out on the floor with his ribbon applied

Reach down, give him a stroke and say "Dont know what we did last night lad but we won first and second prize" 

   

[cem_devecioglu]

 

[Richie London]

I shared a room with a scouser in Wales a few yrs ago. he was that loud he would of done a better job than a lighthouse keeping ships out to see. i grind my teeth badly sometimes I've broken my filling off.

[bertie1.8vectra]

You are all amateurs compared to me i can snore like a class 37 going through a tunnel and fart worst than a sewerage farm..... I got kicked out of the holiday caravan i was in on a sun holiday down by portsmouth with my ex and best mate and his wife for snoring, i had to sleep in the beemer for the rest of the week. I still suffer with it and have also tried the cures but for no success i also wake myself sometimes choking because my throat closes up for some reason and got rushed to bourenmouths general hospital because i was turning blue in the face... not a good feeling... as for my farts it does not matter what i eat i always seem to turn into a lethal gas that can and will make people recoil in horror.... Me i seem to enjoy my own smell for some strange and perveted reason.....