Here's a long, meandering (but true) 12 year old story of my introduction to the wonderful world of Mercedes Benz. Had a healthy respect for them ever since:
Come back from a 5 week assignment to my employer’s Toronto office, flight lands at 5am, I’m at my desk in London by 9am.
My boss, Sarah, comes to see me. “Albert” she says, “we need you to be at our Darlington office [300 miles away] first thing tomorrow morning, we’re moving some work there and they aren’t confident about going-live without one of our best people (I'm easilly buttered) being onsite to trouble shoot any problems. You’ll need to leave this afternoon, travel up there by train, stay in a hotel tonight and tomorrow night and return home the day after tomorrow.”
“Sarah”, I say, “I’d love to help” [translation: WTF are you doing moving work whilst I’m away, we both know you’re going to f*** it up] “but I’ve only just got back in the country, I haven’t even unpacked my suitcase yet and I’m really looking forward to sleeping in my own bed for the first time in weeks; so can’t you find anyone else?”
“Albert”, she says, “we both know you’re the only person for the job. Please will you go?”
“Ok”, I say, “I’ll do it. BUT, I’m not going by train and staying in a hotel. I’ll drive up there in the morning, leave home at 4.30am, be at the office by 9am, work through until 5pm and be home by 9.30pm. That way I get to sleep in my own bed tonight”.
“Great”, she says. “But where am I supposed to get you a car from?”
“I’ll take the pool car”, I say. [A Vauxhall Astra. Estate. Diesel. Non-turbo. Grand total of 57 BHP. To drive a 600 mile round trip in one day]. Deal, she says.
“Sh*t”, I think to myself. That’s going to be a fun drive, what was I thinking?
Half an hour later, Sarah’s boss, Rachel, comes to see me. “Thanks for agreeing to go to Darlington” she says. “You’re welcome” I say. “Rather than take the Astra, wouldn’t you rather take the Toyota Carina?” she asks. I think to myself, Toyota Carina, 1.8, 113 BHP. That’s more like it. “I’ll take it” I tell her. Journey looks a lot more palatable now.
Half an hour later, Rachel’s boss Martin, Director of Operations, comes to see me. .“Thanks for agreeing to go to Darlington” he says. “You’re welcome” I say. “Rather than take the Toyota, wouldn’t you rather take the Mercedes?” he asks. “What Mercedes?” I ask. “Alan left the company whilst you were away and his company Mercedes E-Class has been sitting outside Reception for a week. Do you want to take it?”
Hmmm, I think to myself. Mercedes E320 or Toyota Carina 1.8…. tough decision. Not. “I’ll take it”.
Two days later, Wednesday morning, I go to see Martin in his office. “Here are the keys to the Mercedes, thanks for lending it to me”. “What did you think of it?” he asks. “Fabulous. Sounds like a jet engine when it’s at 6000 RPM. When you’re driving along in the 3rd lane of the motorway, slower traffic see you in their rear view mirror and they jump out of your way, it’s like Moses parting the red sea. Thoroughly enjoyed it. Any chance at all I can keep it for another day?”. “I’d get in trouble if anyone found out” he says. “Ok”, I say, looking like I’m about to cry. I start to walk away. “Give the keys back to me on Monday” he says……
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Topic: My First Time... (Read 1160 times)