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[dave the builder]

breeze lock walls, wire mesh roof with padlocks and by the 4th photo it's escaped 
what's it's name Harry Houdini 

[Migv6 le Frog Fan]

Her name is actually Dora, as in Dora the explorer. 

At least you didnt mention the bricklaying. 
It nearly ferkin killed me doing it tbh. 

[dave the builder]

If it's any conciliation ....
My Koi eat 2 bags of aldi prawns over £5 a week , plus expensive pre made Koi pellets plus homemade food (rice,peas,sweatcorn,chicken breast etc) plus mealworms and other treats and live in a heated indoor pond in the winter which will cost upwards of £200 in electric for the heat , plus add another £250 in electric to run the water pumps and filters etc per year .
the cat costs £35 a month to insure, plus upwards of £15 per week in food
It's expensive having pets 

next time i'm having a pet stick 

[Migv6 le Frog Fan]

And you cant take Koi for a walk either. 
Tortoise food is free. Its just weeds really. Have to regularly walk around the local countryside foraging for them though.
This actually a good thing as we both need a bit of exercise. 

[ronnyd]

And you cant take Koi for a walk either. 
Tortoise food is free. Its just weeds really. Have to regularly walk around the local countryside foraging for them though.
This actually a good thing as we both need a bit of exercise. 

Take Dora for the walk with you, then she can pick her own.

[dave the builder]

And you cant take Koi for a walk either. 
Tortoise food is free. Its just weeds really. Have to regularly walk around the local countryside foraging for them though.
This actually a good thing as we both need a bit of exercise. 

Take Dora for the walk with you, then she can pick her own.

He'd never keep up with Dora 

[Migv6 le Frog Fan]

You may be right.  She could certainly walk further than me in a day. They can walk quite a few miles in a day apparently/

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

Her name is actually Dora, as in Dora the explorer. 

At least you didnt mention the bricklaying. 
It nearly ferkin killed me doing it tbh. 

Are you sure it is a girl?

They don't have an obvious 'big swinging dick'.....

[Sir Tigger KC]

Her name is actually Dora, as in Dora the explorer. 

At least you didnt mention the bricklaying. 
It nearly ferkin killed me doing it tbh. 

Are you sure it is a girl?

They don't have an obvious 'big swinging dick'.....

I had a tortoise called Sam when I was kid, and I think he did have a big swinging dick when he pissed all over me. 

Always hold a tortoise facing away from you. 

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

Her name is actually Dora, as in Dora the explorer. 

At least you didnt mention the bricklaying. 
It nearly ferkin killed me doing it tbh. 

Are you sure it is a girl?

They don't have an obvious 'big swinging dick'.....

I had a tortoise called Sam when I was kid, and I think he did have a b

ig swinging dick when he pissed all over me. 

Always hold a tortoise facing away from you. 

Sounds like you are confusing an elephant with a tortoise, which is easily done.

The 'big swinging dick' was in fact his trunk. And it sprayed you with water and not piss.

[Sir Tigger KC]

Her name is actually Dora, as in Dora the explorer. 

At least you didnt mention the bricklaying. 
It nearly ferkin killed me doing it tbh. 

Are you sure it is a girl?

They don't have an obvious 'big swinging dick'.....

I had a tortoise called Sam when I was kid, and I think he did have a b

ig swinging dick when he pissed all over me. 

Always hold a tortoise facing away from you. 

Sounds like you are confusing an elephant with a tortoise, which is easily done.

The 'big swinging dick' was in fact his trunk. And it sprayed you with water and not piss.

Well I think I was about 8 and as I remember, Sam who was quite elderly, maintained a steady stream that Uncle STEMO would be proud of. 

I don't think I examined his dick in any detail, but that's how I know that a tortoise's dick points forwards. 

[Migv6 le Frog Fan]

Her name is actually Dora, as in Dora the explorer. 

At least you didnt mention the bricklaying. 
It nearly ferkin killed me doing it tbh. 

Are you sure it is a girl?

They don't have an obvious 'big swinging dick'.....

If the egs are hatched at a certain temperature (oround 30 degrees iirc) they will almost certainly be boys. If they are hatched a couple of degrees warmer, they will almost certainly be girls. Cant tell for certain though until they arwe a few years old apparently.
Things is Dora is very nosey and curious, loves heat, could sleep for England, and behaviour patterns follow no logic, so shes a girl. 

[Sir Tigger KC]

I hope that penitentiary that you've built is rat proof!   

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8777533/Pet-tortoises-eaten-ALIVE-hungry-rats-deprived-kitchen-scraps-lockdown.html

[Field Marshal Dr. Opti]

I hope that penitentiary that you've built is rat proof!   

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8777533/Pet-tortoises-eaten-ALIVE-hungry-rats-deprived-kitchen-scraps-lockdown.html

RIP......Dora.

[Migv6 le Frog Fan]

It is indeed rat proof. Hence the mesh lids. Rats wont try to bit through steel Hence that mesh is also all the way around the perimeter of my garden and shed.
Used to be plagued by the evil little bastards, and drowning them in a bucket of water gets a bit tedious after a while.