No such thing as best - its horses for courses 
Obviously, if you want a simple phone that is an unreliable (hardware and software) heap, and you are of suspect sexuality, then Nokia N series
If you are a gullible pillock, or you work for a corporate, then Blackberry.
If you are sane, then Winmobile (shame nobody but HTC make them)
If you think style is more importnant than substance, then Apple has a product for you 
fully understand all except this part. Esp as i know you owned an n95 iirc? Can only presume Nokia’s irritating habbit of relesing buggy un finished phones has done your head in? Which is understandable, every nokia i've owned has been crashy on the first couple of software versions.
BUT...I would have thought it ideal for you in the long run as it's menus are totally customiziable. The vast majority of dross aps can be either removed or left in the depths of the menu never to be seen again, leaving the main menu (route folder) full of all the stuff you want and actually use. You've mentioned over complex menus and crap kiddy winks applications in the past, but the former fixs the latter. You can go in as deep as you wanty and be as childish as you like, take it or leave it. Or make ot what you will, i should say.
I get the impression you want only the functions you mention and nothing else?
ps, dont worry though its not a gay phone, but as i recall there was little hesitation in meeting someone you met on the internet in a remote and pleasant country side car park, and going for a ride in his car.
